Abort the Bastards

Oregon recently granted adoptees the right to view their original birth certificates. The state joins Tennessee, Alaska, Delaware and Kansas in giving this privilege to children whose biological parents were nauseated by the mere sight of them.

Naturally, birth parents are up in arms. They gave the little bastards to loving homes, where they wouldn't spend their days resented or nourished by dog feces and pure hatred. And look at how they're being repaid.

The birth parents assumed the process would guarantee anonymity, unless both parties desired contact. They didn't want 18-year-old mental cases showing up on their doorsteps because they knew -- just knew -- their real mommies and daddies would understand them. Not like those evil ogres who don't even share a drop of DNA with them.

Thanks to the tireless efforts of adoptee rights organizations, such as Bastard Nation, those birth parents could soon hear the loud knocking of their mistakes.

34-year-old Kim Morter was among the Oregonian adoptees turning in the applications that would allow them to annoy the shit out of the people who created them.

``I've been waiting 34 years to possibly dredge up the painful details surrounding my conception, so I don't think another six weeks will make any difference. I just hope that if my mom was raped, she doesn't mind if my track down my dad, too. I want to know if I have his eyes,'' Morter said.

I support the efforts of Kim and other adoptees.

Countries that opened adoption records sometimes experienced a decline in adoptions and an increase in abortions. Rather than face the nightmare of a kid with issues tracking them down, they had the brats sucked out before they could present a problem.

It's subtle population control, and given America's love of privacy, it could work here.

Pro-choice advocates frequently prattle on about overpopulation, but in the same breath, remind their enemies that they support adoption as an alternative to abortion.

Why?

Whether the birth parents or the adoptive parents rear the kid, the kid is still here -- sucking up oxygen and crowding the highways.

Adoption is not a worthwhile alternative. It's simply a cop-out for people who are not only too weak to terminate a pregnancy but too weak to suck it up and take care of their living tribute to a one-night stand.

They don't want the responsibility of being a parent, but they do like the idea of their genes walking around. They can jump in the gene pool without getting wet.

Nice fucking deal.

But now, it's going to bite them in the ass. They're going to be examples to those who don't want to end up in their place.

They're going to have to explain to their families that it wasn't just eating too many burgers during the summer of '78 that caused them to put on weight. They'll have to explain to their husbands that, oops, they really weren't virgins on their weddings nights. And they'll have to explain to their children that they have a brother or sister that wasn't wanted, but no, that doesn't mean that Mommy/Daddy will decide that they don't want them someday.

They'll be the poster children for abortion. "Don't want to be in an awkard situation 18 years from now? Don't want to find out that the kid you gave away shares your mom's fear of aliens putting cancer in her brain? Well, run -- don't walk -- to your nearest clinic!"

So, support adoptee rights because, really, aren't there enough weirdo adopted kids out there?

Providing jack-off material for white misogynists since 1997.

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