Gone Girl: 3 reasons why I'm #TeamAmy

I'll start this post by saying, that I held back from writing my thoughts on this book whilst it was still the hot topic because:

a) I didn't want to ruin it for anyone

b) I wanted to give time for the hype to die down and to let my thoughts marinate

If for any reason you haven't read the book or watched the movie (I did the former), then flee whilst you can because this post will be riddled with spoilers and I won't be held responsible. Ta.

Anyway, back to my post. I sat down with two close friends on Thursday night and as we discussed controversial (and fictional) villains, both Walter White (whom I hate with a passion) and the amazing Amy came up. 

I explained that I  loved  admired/respected her and whilst one friend agreed, the other couldn't quite comprehend. I took the time to explain my feelings to him and I'm about to do the same for you:

1. Amy is brilliant. For all her psychosis (and she was entirely fucking crazy), Amy's intellect, her sheer genius cannot be disputed. The dedication it takes to fake your death, nay, your murder and frame another person, with all the intricacies involved deserves some admiration. She said it herself, people fail at such things because they lack the requisite patience, dedication and discipline it takes to execute such a plan and I agree wholeheartedly.

2. Amy didn't start it. I've been singing this song for such a long time, but I'll sing it again in soprano top C so you hear me clearly; no one. ever. asks. what. the. other. person. did.  Amy's need for revenge was to the point of lunacy; she always went too far in her acts of retribution and that's a fact. 

However, the key word here is revenge, which suggests a preceding act of wrongdoing. Had someone (whether it be Ben with his infidelity or Desi with his super creepy need to control her) not originally wronged her, there would be nothing to avenge. Newton himself informed us that for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction and whilst her reactions may not have been equal per se, they were never without reason. 

Alas, as life and humans can be unpredictable, you never know how volatile another person's mental state may be, ergo, once you wrong someone, you have to be prepared for their reaction, or as was with Amy's case, their overreaction. In other words, don't start nothin' it won't be nothin'.

3. Amy reaffirmed my thoughts on 'cool girl'. If you've forgotten this speech (and I sincerely hope you haven't) here's a snippet to refresh your memory:

"Being the Cool Girl means I am a hot, brilliant, funny woman who adores football, poker, dirty jokes, and burping, who plays video games, drinks cheap beer, loves threesomes and anal sex" 

- read the full excerpt of this amazing passage here.

Recently, I spoke to my brother about my relationship status (single, if you were wondering) and he said something akin to me needing to adjust my personality just ever so slightly in order not to appear overpowering to men. 

In my humble opinion, this is a pile of shit, but it is this precise faecal matter that is the basis of the point Amy was making. There is an unspoken pressure to pretend to be another person in the beginning of a relationship; to hold back on voicing your feelings (whether they be annoyance or a keen interest) lest he (or indeed she) brands you a nag/controlling/needy.

In the past, I know I've felt the pressure to be Cool Girl; for me it has previously meant toning down my sarcasm, laughing at things that really didn't amuse me or ramping up my sexuality at times when I may not have necessarily been too enamoured by the activities at play. Interpret that how you will.

Those days are far behind me and I'm no longer Cool Girl (Amy can confirm this to be fact). A while back I made a conscious decision to be honest and to be unapologetically me, flaws and all, but during that time, I've uncovered another truth spoken by Amy as explained by another part of her speech:

How do you know you’re not Cool Girl? Because he says things like: “I like strong women.” If he says that to you, he will at some point fuck someone else. Because “I like strong women” is code for “I hate strong women.”

I don't know if I agree that he will always 'fuck someone else', but I do agree that men who claim to like stronger women, more often than not, later reveal that to not be the case. "I think you're intriguing and honest" can turn to, "you're a bitch" really quickly when a man feels emasculated. 

I have so much more to say on the issue, but this is slowly slipping into a pseudo-feminist thesis and that was not my intention. I may elaborate at a later stage but my original point remains; villain or nay, when it comes to Amy vs Ben, I am entirely #TeamAmy.

Cheers