On CHOW: Grilled cheese sandwich cravings
Sign up | Log in

Log in to post and mark posts as watched.

refresh »
  • [-]so for those who could pay 35K a year for private school - why wouldn't you?

    67 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]
    02.10.09, 05:45 AM [ Flag ]
    • If they started charging less, I'd totally pay less;)

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 05:48 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • They are cheap.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 05:54 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • OR below: This is exactly why I'm turned off by private -- are you a private school parent? I'd far prefer to give the $35,000 to charity. But you can't imagine anyone not choosing private except for "cheapness".

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.10.09, 06:16 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • I would. Obviously cost is an issue but I think it's just as important to teach DC that there are other people in the world besides trust fund babies.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.10.09, 10:42 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • sometimes being "cheap" is why you can afford private school.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.10.09, 06:29 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • Totally true in our case. Many of our friends who plead poverty as the reason for sending their kids to public schools have summer homes, take exotic vacations, keep a car in the city. We don't have any of that, which is how we manage.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 10:17 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • i can't say i won't change my tune when MS comes, but for elementary i do not see any reason to do private. not a big fan of entitlement or exclusion; i am a fan of neighborhood schoools and diversity. so we save the money.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 05:56 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • I feel exactly the same way. I recognize that the academics can be amazing in private, but I'm completely turned off by the idea of sending dc to a school filled with rich people. I know there are a miniscule number of "exceptions", but I have to laugh when the "not rich" diversity in privates are families of highly educated parents who went to good colleges and happen to have "interesting" jobs that pay less money. I strongly doubt there are many kids in K who are from typical middle or working class families -- plumbers, doormen, fed ex delivery workers. I'm fortune to have a zoned public that has families from all backgrounds, but I'd feel the same way about some rich suburban public school as well.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.10.09, 06:14 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • OR: and i just can't buy into this idea that TT K is necessary for a good education or successful life. I went to pretty crappy elementary schools, and i relaly don't see it having set me back.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.10.09, 06:19 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • Me, too. Went to top liberal arts college from mediocre public. The private school kids had an easier time first year, but the rest of us caught up pretty quickly and despite starting with a huge advantage, the private school kids weren't necessarily the stars. And in the long run, there's no difference at all. Making a happy life for yourself isn't about going to a tt K, it's about the intangibles you get from your parents and experiences.

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.10.09, 06:30 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • I know the children of police officers, a plumber and a parent in the military in private schools (independent, not parochial) and I don't know that many private school parents.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 03:25 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • hmmm...what private school has these kids in K or 1st? I mean, the police officer and plumber's kids.

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 08:55 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
            • I have no idea, but in our private, a good one fourth of the class have one parent who is a public school teacher or administrator.

              [ Reply | Options ]
              02.11.09, 10:18 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • ditto.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.10.09, 06:24 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • its not about entitlement or exclusion for me. those things didn't even occur to me. It was all about class size.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 04:47 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • we are lucky to be in a position where we can get by without spending the $$ = very good public option - i understand that private might be "better" on a scale - but we are pretty sure that it will nto be a big differential for our child

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 06:10 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • i'm a big proponent of public schools. i went to a great suburban one in the midwest (westinghouse scholars, etc.) and i feel like part of the whole experience was meeting all kinds of dcs who weren't handpicked for any reason, they were just there, including ones whose families were on public assistance and who were just seen as dcs, not charity cases. i'm not knocking privates, i just think the public philosophy is a better fit for us.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 06:44 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Because crappy privates are worse than publics and my DC did not get into tt

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 09:58 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • you cannot possibly think that if you could afford a private school IN NEW YORK CITY you would choose to send your dc to a public facility. please... this discussion has no merit. not in NYC. in midwest - yes. not here, baby.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 10:09 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • Many NYC privates are full of slow DCs with behavioral problems - No Thanks

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.10.09, 10:14 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • that's not true. my dd goes to public and we've visited many of her friends' places and they are beautiful, very large aptms. judging by that, i'd say they could well afford private but choose not to.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.10.09, 10:23 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • The average IQ of the DCs at a school like Dwight is 40% lower than the average IQ at PS87

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.10.09, 10:24 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • lol... OK PS87 mom, keep dreaming!

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.10.09, 06:28 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
            • I would be embarassed to put my DC at Dwight - it's humiliating

              [ Reply | Options ]
              02.10.09, 06:32 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
              • You're either a Dwight reject or don't know much about the school but hey if it can make you feel better about yourself, power to you.

                [ Reply | Options ]
                02.10.09, 06:42 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • Every kid I know at dwight actually has a very high IQ, but also some mild learning issues which made the family seek out a supportive school like dwight. But stupid, not on your ass.

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 04:48 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • Except obviously the discussion DOES have merit because several posters have stated that they would. I am one of them. I went to public school my whole life. Public schools taught me English in one year and put me in honors classes the next. Public schools put me in an Ivy. I could afford it, but I wouldn't send DC to it.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.10.09, 10:34 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • Parents like you (and your overentitled kids) are but two of the reasons I keep my kids out of private school.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.10.09, 06:50 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • LOL -- ITA, and I suspect my dh makes significantly more than most private school parents. I just can't do it.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 08:56 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • Clearly, you are living in some other NYC than the one I'm living in. Many, many kids whose parents can afford private go to public.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 09:40 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • I'd rather rent a country house for the summer.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 10:15 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Dc got into Hunter

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 11:50 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • i don't know anyone who wouldn't. nyc public schools are not very attractive IMO

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 06:29 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Because every time a wealthy person buys their way out of a broken public system, they are ensuring that the system stays broken. I'd rather try to fix the system from within.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 06:46 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • Good luck with that, Sanctimom.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.10.09, 06:51 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • I can teach my kids that I'm willing to compromise my integrity by sending them to private school. Or I can live in a way that is consistent with my politics. My kids get to sit down to a healthy dinner with two living parents in a comfortable home every night. Aren't they already better off than 99% of the kids in this world? Just how many more advantages do they need? And, fwiw, the check I write to our PS every year makes a much bigger difference than it would in any NYC private.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.10.09, 07:11 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • ^^ living = loving

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.10.09, 07:15 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • Really? We feel that the check we write to our private scholarship fund makes a great deal of difference. DH attended the TT school on scholarship and it sure made a difference to him!

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 09:40 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
            • The check you write enables one or a handful of kids to attend your TT school. The check I write affects 100% of the kids in my PS, including the 15% who are living below the poverty line. How many of those are there at your TT? (And ask your dh a question for me... how long did it take for every kid in the school to know he was there on scholarship? When I was at a TT, everyone knew before we found our lockers on the first day.)

              [ Reply | Options ]
              02.11.09, 10:04 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • ITTTA. UB kids are privileged above almost every kid inthe world. to think that it is imperative to, on top of that, send your kid to an expensive private, is sort of crazy to me.

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 09:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • How old are your kids?

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 02:53 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • Their first prioity should be their children, not a "system."

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 09:00 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • I'd rather hasten the system's complete breakdown so we can get started on building a better one. And FWIW, DH and I are African-American. We've seen what this system has done for "our" children and we want no part of it.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 09:38 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • What grades are your kids in?

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 09:40 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • I hear you.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 09:41 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • So how can we raise the education level for all "our" children?

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 09:47 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • That is the billion dollar question with a million and one "right" answers. My answer is lots and lots of parental involvement in schools. But if you were raised by a crack-head mom and no father, I can say for a fact that kids like me were pretty much on our own and stuck in a shitty school and really no one gave a damn. I'm sure not much has changed for kids like me in good ol 2009.

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 09:53 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • DFER has some good ideas -- Charter schools like KIPP and the Teach For America program. But what the previous poster said, too: Lots and lots of parental involvement (stopping short of the point where it does more harm than good).

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 10:14 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • We could have afforded it, and chose public. No regrets - dcs are now in excellent public MS and HS.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 09:36 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
  • [-]I tutor DCs in some low-tier privates...some of these schools are really weak academically (based on the homework the kids are getting). Some of my students are using me for enrichment, btw

    56 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]
    02.11.09, 08:02 AM [ Flag ]
    • seems like you are using them for the same thing

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:03 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • As compared to...?

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:04 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • When should homework start?

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:04 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • OP: First grade

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 08:05 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • No, HW should start when kids are old enough to work independently and read well enough to be able to follow the instructions without parental guidance. 3rd grade.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 09:04 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • np. ITA, or 2nd at the earliest, depending on the school and dc.

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 09:14 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • The voice of reason!

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 10:07 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • np: it depends on how you define hw. i think that making something to show, bringing in something to discuss, etc. are hw at a pre-reading level. those things are appropriate in 1st grade. or reading for 20 minutes if dc can already read - or being read aloud to if not.

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 10:10 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • snitch

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:08 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • And you're happy to collect their money.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:10 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • OP: I think the problem is that in their effort to be nurturing, many private schools teach to the lowest common denominator...so some students are bored to death and some still struggle anyway

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:14 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • OK so where would you send your kids?

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:16 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • do you work with downtown private schools or only uptown? i'd love to have someone give me more insights how schools stack up academically. it is so hard to judge from the ouside.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:17 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • np: how to UB "tiers" stack up regarding schools you consider weak academically? Are the 3rd tier schools weak or only the 4th tier? Or is it even some 2nd tier schools?

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 08:38 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • nnp and please don't forget the 3.5 tier and 2.75 tiers as well

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 08:41 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • OP: UB tiers are actually very good at grouping schools by academic strength

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 08:42 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • that's kind of what i figured. do you think that as the lower tier schools become more competetive from an admissions standpoint, the "lowest common denominator" has been elevated in recent years?

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 09:03 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Can you give an example of what you are talking about? How so poor academically? Can you name a school?

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:18 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • I can not name a school, but I can give examples. When 3rd grade students still learn double-digit addition and 2nd grade students learn to tell time, I call that "weak academically". Also the books they read are one year behind the average DC in public (we're talking 2nd graders reading easy picture books)

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 08:22 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • At our non-tt school there is a great range of abilities in all subject areas. Most dc being tutored need help - they are not the best group to judge the school by. In my experience only math clearly lags behind the tt schools.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 08:37 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • OP: You really touched on a major difference between tt and non-tt privates. At tt privates there's not a "great range of abilities" and teachers can move at a much faster pace

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 08:40 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
            • Yes, but parents need to know that top students can get an excellent education at non-tt schools.

              [ Reply | Options ]
              02.11.09, 08:43 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
              • OP: "excellent" varies depending on a child's ability - right? I would define "excellent" as an education that helps a child reach his/her potential. So for some DCs a low-tier private would be very inadequate and for some it would be "excellent". One word of caution though: Beware of nurturing schools with "a great range of abilities" - they tend to teach to the lowest common denominator

                [ Reply | Options ]
                02.11.09, 08:46 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                • I agree. This is tough to talk about this week. Of the 2500-3000 applicants waiting to hear only about 10 percent will get a tt spot.(assuming about 500 tt spots with half going to sib/leg) Most will be going to non-tt schools. My advice - take a hard look at how willing and able the school is to individualize curriculum. If the can't do this it can't meet the needs of top students.

                  [ Reply | Options ]
                  02.11.09, 09:00 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
                  • np--I don't think it's just individualizing the curricula, especially in older grades. I think it's more about a teacher expecting work that matches a child's potential. In something like math, my dc's 7th grade teacher always has extra credit questions that are more challenging.

                    [ Reply | Options ]
                    02.11.09, 09:31 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • I think 2nd grade is reasonable for telling analog time. The idea of using one scale for two different measurements is complicated. My dd didn't get fluid in this until maybe 4th grade.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 08:59 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • np. By your definition, most of the "TT" schools would be considered weak academically, at least in math. In my experience, the better the school, the less they push academics in the early years. Middle school is where the big differences start to show up. Until then they take their time and build a rock solid foundation.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 09:09 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • ITA. I think the tt schools allow children's development to unfold at different rates... They know, for example, tbat a firrst grader who is barely reading, but listens to complex books and asks subtle questions is likely to have mjch better reading comprehension later than a child who is decoding like a champ at 5, but who can't talk meaningfully about what he/she has read.

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 10:14 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • do you tutor any at tt privates?

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:20 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Why don't you name the schools? Do you tutor children in higher-tier privates as well?

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:20 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • I have a student of a tt school the material he covers is way more accelerated. The do grammar, astronomy, geography, history that are a year or two ahead of zoned publics

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 08:24 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • ...but that student can't do the work without your support. Acceleration would be more impressive if it didn't feed the need for tutors.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 08:33 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • OP: TT schools are not for everyone - and they are not willing to hold the class back for 4-5 students that have trouble keeping up. They do offer support, but sometimes students might need extra support

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 08:35 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
            • True

              [ Reply | Options ]
              02.11.09, 08:38 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
            • np TTs teach to the middle--same as other schools. The kids at the head of the pack in tt often end up very bored, even in K (much of the curriculum being material they mastered a few years earlier).

              [ Reply | Options ]
              02.11.09, 09:21 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
              • np: but the middle may be of a much narrower range - not just for the material but for the speed at which kids master it.

                [ Reply | Options ]
                02.11.09, 09:24 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • As if a "tutor" knows everything about every school. I take all of this with a huge chunk of salt, and I bet this post is fake anyway. Probably just someone posting trying to scare people away from the so-called lower-tier schools as the notification date approaches.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:58 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • np: what would she stand to gain by doing so? I actually find her comments quite interesting and answer some of the questions I had but just never got around to ask here.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 09:07 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Do some tutors really do a student's work for them, esp in HS?

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 09:02 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • This was actually helpful for me as we are considering private. FWIW, we have a DC related to us who goes to a chinatown G&T and dad told me that her tutor says that DC math homework is too hard and completely inappropriate developmentally for children (DC is in K and gets 45 minutes/day of homework)

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 09:33 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
  • [-]The new preschool director at our school just spoke to me SO RUDELY. I don't even know what to do. Who the F does she think she is?

    16 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]
    02.11.09, 07:55 AM [ Flag ]
    • Some preschool directors are nut cases (Ronnie of WMS comes to mind) and yet if you want to apply to privates you'll have to kiss her ass (or pull your DC out)

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 07:58 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • was it really rude or maybe you just took it wrong? not being snarky just asking

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:00 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • This is a stressful time for all concerned, nerves are raw.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:02 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Kill her with kindness. I find with people like that, the nicer I get the more thrown off their game they get. And ask specific questions, especially if she said something so rude and outrageous. Also, follow up with a question. That will really confuse her and force her to speak to you respectfully on the next go-round.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:03 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • ITA

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 08:04 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • oh please! anyobe who has been around for anytime will see right through that and hate you for it. that sickly sweet bs in the midst of a tense exchange is nothing more than pure hostility, and if OP wants her psd to help her, she should definitely avoid that tactic. see ths all the time among pta ladies, and they are usually bubbling over with pushiness and hostility. most would go out of their way to foil an a hole like that.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 08:42 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • np: its a woman thing! very hateful, I agree!

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 08:55 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • Say what!!! I agreed with this above, and what the heck are you saying? It's very hateful to reply with kindness when someone is rude? I should be rude back? So what exactly is the "man" thing to do -- challenge the woman to a fight outside?

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 09:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
            • Good one. I didn't realize the woman was using a rude tone. Honestly, not a lot you can do about someone's tone. But if the director had said something completely out of line, I say question her on it without being aggressive. I'm not sure what she could say that would be so upsetting to a parent. So I would need an example.

              [ Reply | Options ]
              02.11.09, 10:08 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
              • Well, I agree with you that it does depend on the circumstances. If someone is just rude out of the blue, I think niceness can be worthwhile. That's very different than being in the middle of an argument with someone.

                [ Reply | Options ]
                02.11.09, 10:13 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • So what they will hate me. I just don't always believe in responding to rudeness with rudeness especially if the situation involves my child. There are rude people everywhere and I see no need to be rude back or aggressive as it usually leads to nowhere. Doesn't mean you have to take someone's hit lying down but I have no interest in being hostile with anyone. If you want to get in the directors face about a slight, go for it. Plus I'm Black and as soon as a White person sees a Black woman getting tense they become afraid and see a bitter Black bitch. So I always maintain my politeness while still hoping to get something positive out of a tense exchange.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 09:02 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Maybe you were being a PITA and she was fed up with it and put you in your place and now you think SHE spoke to YOU so rudely. A likely scenario.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • I agree. She's probably sick of being pestered for information when you'll have a letter in hand soon enough. It's all over but the waiting. Chill out.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 09:35 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
  • [-]Benefits of raising kids in the city are.....Benefits of raising kids in the suburbs are......

    26 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]
    02.10.09, 08:18 PM [ Flag ]
    • city: something new to do every single day if you want to; suburbs: you can let them ride their bike or roller blade around without having to be next to them

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 08:30 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • Re your burbs comment, you can do that in NYC of course. And NYC kids become more independent than their suburban counterparts starting in middle school - riding the city bus and subways and walking around with friends, on their own.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.10.09, 08:36 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • I don't know about that. I grew up in the suburbs and used to go on bike trips and walks to the local strip mall, etc. too around middle school. Plus we drive in the suburbs. Plus there's just something about having a nice green lawn and looking out of your window to see the woods.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.10.09, 08:39 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • The driving is what I mean. All the MS kids & older I know in the burbs get driven around by their parents or in a carpool or by older sibs.

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.10.09, 08:52 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
          • i think some burbs allow for independence bc they are more concentrated and can be walked and others not as much bc they are too rural and a car is needed to go almost anywhere.

            [ Reply | Options ]
            02.11.09, 09:06 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
            • Even in burbs with a walkable downtown, most kids get driven around for school, playdates, lessons, parties, soccer/baseball/etc games and practices...

              [ Reply | Options ]
              02.11.09, 09:31 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • np: you should be next to them (or at least be able to see them) in the burbs is where all of these abductions happen because everyone is so laid back

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 04:39 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Both have benefits but I'd HATE to have my teens in the suburbs. It'd be okay for early childhood but we'd need to get back to the city for autonomy skillset. I'd rather they took the bus to the Moma(or wherever) if they cut school, rather than hopping in a car to whatever house to do whatever.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.10.09, 09:05 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • eh, I would rather forego some of the independence (and I don't know why that's so necessary in early childhood since that's sort of the main point of adolescence and college) for some fresh air and surrounding greenery

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.10.09, 09:13 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • Please reread my reply.I think the suburbs (actually country or rural areas, for me) would have more benefits to a younger child, since parents/home are still very central to their everyday life.I'm an aunt to urban kids and suburban kids. The urban kids know how to get around, take advantage of the city's offerings and are more invested in planning and living their own lives, as young adults and moving forward. They have a more global view, travel outside of the city and the US and have clearly benefited from more multi-cultural,socio-economically varied environment.The suburban kids were sexually active at an earlier age, tend to hang out in culturally and racially segregated and homogenous groups,have some very sheltered views as a resul...

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 05:30 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • in the city you get to stress about money all the time

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 12:01 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • In the city, your child is not driving at the age of 16.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 02:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • The benefit of raising my kids in the city is that they get to be raised in their home. If they lived in the suburbs i don't know who would be raising them!

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 04:06 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • City: dcs get exposed to a wide variety of people (rich, poor, different languages, different colors...) as opposed to cookie-cutter suburbs, where everyone tends to be like their neighbors.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 04:11 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • I"ve done both. We were in the city until oldest was in middle school. I can't wait to move back to the city but I am absolutely cnovinced that they have a less pressured, higher quality of life out here. THere is something very normal about going to your neighborhood school. We still walk places, they still go to museums, their friends are just as diverse. It really depends on the burb of course, just as it depends on how you live your life in NYC.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 04:44 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • the kids (meaning tweens and teens) are too bore in the burbs. All they do is get into trouble (drugs, car racing, sex parties). This can happen anywhere but at least in the city the kids actually have places to visit that they can walk to and not all have to drive (with their friends) to do anything

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 04:46 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • lol, my teen ds does exactly what his nyc friends do. THey go to friends homes, play video games and go to the movies. The 1 difference is he can't just hop in a cab so I have to be around to drive if he's going too far.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 04:47 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • Your lol is strange to me; Our teens don't have those activities central to their lives, except the going to friends' homes. It's always amazing how much I get 'turned on' to, via my kids. They tell me what's at the Moma, about performances, community cultural events and film festivals.I'm not saying they've never played Wii, but it's a novelty.My kids watched Gossip Girl(once)at the insistence of their NJ suburban cousins and got halfway through. I'm the one feeling like I could leave ny, but they have what I did at their ages and I'd never take it away.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 05:40 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • As someone who has done both, here are the plusses and minues: In city, you have more free time to spend with family on w/e because you are not spending time on the house (Although this would not be true if you are wealthy enough to have others take care of every little thing in the house.) In suburbs, kids run outside in yard whenever they want. Next door neighbor kids are out and they have spontaneous play. When indoors in burbs, kids have basement to play in.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 07:50 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • I would rather live in a suburb that has city access, like I did (suburb of Boston). You can enjoy the benefits of the suburb (clean air, nature, friendliness of neighbors) and still go into the city when you want something cultural or educational to do.

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 10:08 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
  • [-]What is the role of the parent coordinator in a public school? Is it to be a liaison between the parent and the admin, or the parent and the DOE, or something else entirely? TIA

    12 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]
    02.11.09, 06:40 AM [ Flag ]
    • Every school seems to use the parent coordinator for different things. In DC's school she is in charge of getting communication out to the parents. Other schools use that person also for incoming communication (like getting in touch with teachers or the principal).

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 06:51 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • np: At our school, AP is in charge of parental communications. PA is there to facilitate one-on-one communications with families and prospective families, and particularly families that have langugage issues.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 06:58 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • I think that I would not want to share personal business with the PC. they ca be gossipy and not objective, are often former parents and not really trained in dealing with the issues.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 07:15 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • the worst ones are the current parents. I do not think that should be allowed, or if it is, they should not be privy to any personal info about families. clear conflict of interest IMO.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 07:20 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • Thank you - very helpful

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 07:20 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • My experience has been that they do very little that is useful and this is a paid position that should be eliminated during these economic times. I'd much rather see one or two extra pt teachers or aides. I find PCs to be either obstructionist (when you are touring and considering attending) or useless (when you actually attend).

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 06:56 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • Obstructionist in my school. She is the inpenetrable wall between the parents and the principal.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 08:54 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
    • Wow, the PC at our child's school is incredible! She IS a parent and that seems to be a plus when it comes to considering the details, workload and concerns that are involved with the job. The PC is probably the first in and last out every day, schedules parents and kids for interview/admissions/makes certain all the busing/transportation/afterschool, field trip, lunch program and endless other things. From school photos to assemblies, fairs, fundraisers,community events, teacher/parent relations, assisting families and kids with assessments, services,helping families access out of school services, representing the program well-with boundless enthusiasm and competence, our PC is more than likely underpaid!

      [ Reply | Options ]
      02.11.09, 08:41 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • everything you list is fine and even great, except for the teacher/parent relations. I think if she is or was a parent in the school, she has a bias, and a parent would not feel comfortable going to her for this. that is what the principal is there for, or AP. some parents may have a close relationship with her for years, or because of pta involvement, or tthe pc loved a particular teacher for her dc, or hated her or whatever. I would think the school would not put parents in the awkward position of dealing with the PC for difficult, sensitive matters.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 08:48 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • Agree. Unless the parent is friends with the PC, then it would be awkward, and if the parent is friends, and it is a problem between 2 students, then it is an unfair bias toward the family friend.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 08:51 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
        • Actually, my reference to parent-teacher relations isn't to imply that there is any barrier between ourselves communicating with either the principal or teachers. Our school community is very culturally diverse and some of the families go to the PC for many different reasons, including simply needing to know how to deal with any situation. The PC knows every kid in the program by name and family and everyone in the school admires and appreciates her dedicated, generous hard work and competence.

          [ Reply | Options ]
          02.11.09, 09:27 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
      • Sounds good. It really depends on the schools, though. Ours is using the PC more or less as secretary and front desk staff. Not much more.

        [ Reply | Options ]
        02.11.09, 09:27 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
refresh »

Your settings

Stages
Regions
Select all

Log in to save selected filters as your default.

Numbers in parentheses are the number of posts in that category.

advertisement
advertisement
Click Here

UrbanBaby Asks...

Do/Did you and your partner want the same number of children?

Already voted? View Results

See previous polls »

Boards Help

Abbreviations
More Boards Help

Site Feedback Thank you for your feedback about the new site. We are paying close attention to your comments and we will incorporate them as we make improvements to the site. Please continue to report problems and offer feedback on the Site Feedback Board and visit our Site Talk blog for answers to some of your questions and updates on specific issues.