Today I underwent two important realisations. One: that I'd managed to get as far as the breakfast table (or at least, the breakfast window sill) without cottoning onto the fact that my trousers were on backwards. Two: that three of my most anticipated games are coming out in the UK before the end of February 2013.
There's Anarchy Reigns on 11th January, a PlatinumGames effort whose core concept must be shrouded in secrecy lest it cause nearby brains to catch fire. Not far behind you've got DmC: Devil May Cry on 15th January, a parallel universe reboot developed by Ninja Theory, the team behind Andy Serkis and Friends: The Videogame. Finally, there's Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance on 21st February. I wasn't too fussed about this one when Kojima re-announced it earlier in the year - I've never really bonded with Metal Gear's wonted taste for exposition. But my apathy turned to exhilaration on discovering that, among other things, you get to dice a helicopter like a cucumber.
Revengeance should have the softest landing, as Metal Gear is by far the biggest property. Devil May Cry also has something of a reputation to trade on, though it has to reckon with an immense, lingering cloud of utterly misguided fan hatred. But only a handful of franchises have the momentum, the pull to offset the terrible draining effect of the January-February period, and much as I love Raiden and Dante, I can't see them making it through to March unscathed. Anarchy Reigns? They might as well ship it to the surface of the sun, for all the copies it'll sell.
There's a special kind of sadness which comes from reading late winter sales charts. As far as you lucky, trusting, innocent readers concerned, it's all roses - somebody comes top, somebody comes second, and everybody has a massive, enjoyable fight in the comments. Those of us who get to peruse the associated figures have a gloomier time of things. Demand is at lowest ebb across January and February, as consumers recover from their Christmas excesses.
Ergo, the games that sell best generally sell a fraction of what they might if they were released in October or November, the commonly agreed-upon yearly "sweet spot". I can't tell you how depressed I was earlier this year, when a kindly internet person mocked me for "low-balling" a certain title after spotting it atop the week's all-format chart. The game in question had barely scraped 7,000 sales.
22 comments so far...
OXM ETboy on 29 Oct '12 said:
I saw that hastily deleted comment, comabob
Fear not. We're cool with the God of War series round these parts.
Plamsa wing on 29 Oct '12 said:
I still don't understand why Anarchy Reigns was pushed back for those of us not in Japan. Such a stupid move when it was apparently ready to be shipped and there wasn't really much coming out at the time.
Still, I shall be getting it next year... I hope.
msbhvn on 29 Oct '12 said:
Those three games you mention are hack-and-slash. Beat-'em-ups are either one-on-one (Street Fighter) or scrolling (Final Fight).
Other than that, I agree that save Metal Gear, these games have been sent out to die. DmC I'm not sure about after playing the mediocrity-fest that is Enslaved, I'm waiting for reviews on that one. Anarchy Reigns has been treated very badly due to Sega's souring relationship with Platinum, leading to Bayonetta 2 being exclusive to the Nintendo Fire Engine Noise (say the real name out loud three times quickly to get the joke).
I've been bewildered by Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance since it was announced some time in 1997. Do they really expect it to sell well when they turn an established franchise on its head and release an out-of-genre title starring a character everyone hated? Maybe they want to top OXM's "great games no one played" list of 2013?
Speaking of OXM and its "great games no one played" list, I bought Binary Domain today, which I immediately put on my backlog pile with the full intention of playing Borderlands 2 tomorrow instead. I hope you're happy with yourselves.
OXM ETboy on 29 Oct '12 said:
I'm really hoping somebody from Ninja Theory spots this and comments - not, I imagine, that they'll have much say in when DmC sees release
Sir, thou liest.
"Beat 'em up (also known as brawler) is a video game genre featuring melee combat between the protagonist and an improbably large number of underpowered enemies. These games typically take place in urban settings and feature crime-fighting and revenge-based plots, though some games may employ historical or fantasy themes."
msbhvn on 29 Oct '12 said:
Hack-and-slash has its roots in beat-'em-ups like Final Fight, but the addition of combo meters and buyable/unlockable moves made it a different genre. Think modern Italian evolving from Latin.
And I trust Wikipedia about as far as I can throw a tractor, but from: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hack_and_slash
SidTheSloth on 29 Oct '12 said:
I'm completely with you on the whole 'why release them at the same time?' thing Ed, games like this are often simple to learn and difficult to master. I loved the poo out of the first devil may cry as i had time to practice and learn all the nuances. Unfortunately i didn't grant the same time to Bayonetta or either of the later DMC's if im honest but it's a genre i still have a fond affection for. Out of the three i'm most interested in AR, but i'd probably (and may still at a later date) have picked up DMC if they were split further apart.
As you've got me reminiscing, it doesn't quite sit alongside these games genre wise but Onimusha was one of my other favourite series of japanese devs that surely deserves something of a reboot? I know it caught sequelitis and the quality dropped but i loved it!
You call Enslaved mediocre and then admit you bought Binary Domain?
I really really don't get the fuss about BD, i see people all over this and other sites saying how decent it is but i could find nothing special about it at all. Enslaved may have some mediocre gameplay elements but the story is great - hmm, sounds a bit like Mass Effect 2/3 when i describe it like that? 
OXM ETboy on 29 Oct '12 said:
"Hack-and-slash has its roots in beat-'em-ups like Final Fight, but the addition of combo meters and buyable/unlockable moves made it a different genre."
I'm not sure about that logic. Are DOOM and Call of Duty: Modern Warfare different genres? How about Silent Hill and Resident Evil? Because you can point to similar mechanical differences there - and regarding your Wiki quote, the beat 'em up piece makes mention of Bayonetta, God of War, etc.
I'm prepared to allow "distinct subgenre", which means my headline can remain as is, more or less. Everyone's a winner
Oh god, this is a discussion about semantics isn't it.
SidTheSloth on 29 Oct '12 said:
Isn't the HD reboot of Zone of The Enders out soon too? That's in the same genre (i think - it appears to be open to the ongoing debate above - and no doubt soon below - this post) too really, or is it discounted as it's released before xmas and isn't exactly a new title (although it is new to xbox i think?)
OXM ETboy on 29 Oct '12 said:
Why must you muddy already-muddied waters, Sid. WHY.
Agreed that Zone is worth buying. Not sure when it's out...
msbhvn on 29 Oct '12 said:
I'll take "distinct sub-genre". Beat-'em-up evokes Street Fighter and Final Fight to me, 3D stuff like Bayonetta is different enough to be named differently, so yes... semantics.
I never had a PS2, and so never played ZoE. Don't tell me it was some kind of genius cult game that I must try, my backlog pile might topple and kill me.
I did make a rather hasty judgement of Enslaved, which I rage-quit over the stupid cloud-surfing and Monkey not wanting to travel in the direction I told him to, but when the mechanics are all wonky, you have to wonder why Capcom felt Ninja Theory were a better choice than Platinum to reinvent Devil May Cry.
comabob on 29 Oct '12 said:
I only deleted it cos i thought id check to make sure GOW Ascension is actually coming out next xmas...
Apparently its out in March.
The last beat em up i genuinely enjoyed (before GOW3) was the Splatterhouse remake.
SidTheSloth on 29 Oct '12 said:
It's a gift... One that i've not yet learned to control!
They weren't the best games i've ever played, but they were pretty damn good fun, robot/mech hack-n-beat-em-n-slash-em-up type affair with a nonsense but inoffensive plot. Seem to recall the first one sold pretty well, which had absolutely nothing to do with the fact there was a demo of MGS 2 included - seems they're trying to make lightning strike twice as the HD remake (out 30th November) comes with access to the MGS:Revengeance demo!
There were a couple of rage inducing moments in Enslaved, some of the enemies were beyond irritating, but if you persevered the story was worth it!
Plamsa wing on 30 Oct '12 said:
Damn you Sid of reminding me of Zone of the Enders HD collection! Really enjoyed the first game on the PS2, might have to bug the sister to get me that for christmas, god knows shes keeps asking me what I want. Can't decide which platform I should "make" her get it on though.
Speaking of Hack and Slash, anyone play Spartan: Total Warrior? Bought it on the Gamecube when I get fed up with God of War on the PS2, I remember it being pretty damn good.
Also shame on those that have mentioned Bayonetta 2.
SidTheSloth on 30 Oct '12 said:
Is it just me or am i getting damned an awful lot lately?
You should freak her out next time she asks & tell her what you told me & Grummy!
And unsurprisingly given my love of warrior/hack-n-slash/greek mythology i did play spartan, on th'xbox - enjoyed it despite its simplicity and tendency to freeze (the latter being the reason i never actually finished it).
Grummy on 30 Oct '12 said:
Someone says 'beat-em-up' and I think Streets of Rage, Double Dragon and games like that. I wouldn't even put Golden Axe in the same genre personally, I've always called it a hack-em-up. I make the distinction simple, if I'm punching, kicking or headbutting you as I move through the level, it's a Beat-em-Up, if I'm using weapons primarily, then it's a hack-em-up or shoot-em-up. The only recent Beat-em-up I've played was Sleeping Dogs. It has evolved, from Streets of Rage, but it's the perfect example of a modern Beat-em-up. DMC, GoW, they're not beat-em-ups at all, and never will be. Anyone who suggests otherwise is wrong. Why? Because you don't beat people up, you hack the crap out of them. The police would make a very real distinction between punching and kicking someone and hacking them to pieces with a sword then shooting them in the face, and the same should go for games.
I can't agree with lumping games like DMC and GoW in the beat-em-up category if 3rd person shooters are allowed a separate distinction. Back in the 16 bit days, they were basically the same games with either brawling, melee weapons or shooting weapons, but all had separate distinctions as Beat/Hack/Shoot-em-up, even the magazine publications at the time referred to them in this way, but today shooters are granted separate status but brawlers and weapon fighting games are lumped into one category? Naaah, sorry, it doesn't fly with me, they're different games, always have been.
OXM ETboy on 30 Oct '12 said:
I think this may be the first time I've seen somebody justify a point about game genres with recourse to criminal classification procedure
I see where you're coming from, but by my lights, a hack and slash is still a subgenre of the beat 'em up - true, you've got different means of hurting people but *how* precisely you hurt them (specials, combos, etc) is more or less the same. Many of the games we've discussed allow both bare-fisted melee and weaponised combat, which kind of seals it for me.
Grummy on 30 Oct '12 said:
Well I would agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong, so I can't
FishyGinger on 30 Oct '12 said:
But what about the games you can do both in? The arcade aliens vs predator you could hack and slash, punch and kick, shoot and....shoot some more. And would games like mortal kombat and tekken not be beat em ups?
I think it would just be easiest to say everybody is wrong and lets all have a cup of tea.
Grummy on 30 Oct '12 said:
Games like Tekken et al I always differentiated as 1 on 1 beat-em-ups, and later as fighters, but if anyone was resolute in saying 'this is a beat-em-up' then I wouldn't argue, because it ticks all the boxes.
As for AvP, well, whilst they may be 3 distinct sub genres of the overarching action sub genre, it doesn't mean that every game has to be pigeon holed as one or the other if it crosses the boundaries. Something like Sleeping Dogs I would call a beat-em-up because 90%of the game is beating the crap out of people, not all that much shooting, and Streets of Rage was the same, it was by far mostly bashing people, but occasionally you could pick up a weapon. DMC mixes blades and guns, so you can classify them as you prefer, but to call them beat-em-ups when beating people up is not part of the experience is mislabeling it in my book.
Decent_Jam on 30 Oct '12 said:
I tend to refer to them as 'Games-I-find-slightly-easier-to-play-than-shooters-but-bafflingly-never-buy-and-never-finish'
Except Streets of Rage 2, possibly my favourite game of all time.
trapezium on 1 Nov '12 said:
Are OXM trying to kill the beat-em-up? Fling enough mud and it will stick. That's all I'm saying.
OXM ETboy on 1 Nov '12 said:
Have we been flinging mud?