After a surprisingly active NBA week in the wake of the offseason peak of the Olympic basketball run and the Dwight Howard deal, things sort of died down a bit on Friday. With little blood to squeeze from that stone, all we can kindly offer you to head into the weekend, dearest hoops fan, is an alternative.

Via a decades old clip from 'Late Night With Conan O'Brien,' why not take in some toddler and/or elderly basketball?

One of those toddlers is probably a Bobcat by now.

Tim Duncan blocks Jared Dudley, or is it the other way around? (P.A. Molumby/ Getty)

At this point, most of the NBA is on Twitter. It's a wild world of training updates, questions as to which movies they should go see, and explanations of their Call of Duty prowess. Every so often, though, you also get a picture into the more interesting aspects of NBA life. This feature is your window into that world.

Brandon Rush: Ppl need to cut it out on instagram. That's not YOU!!

Steve Blake: Just ran into @LuolDeng9 at the airport in Kigali Rwanda. Small world.

Jared Dudley: #CelebritiesIveBeenToldILookLike T.Duncan, Jim Jones, Drake, and basically any light skin cat with some facial hair lol

Patrick Patterson: Something about Asians.. Dunno what it is.. But there's something about em.. Americans need to drive like people do over here in China. There would be less accidents.

Damion James: Shark Week! This why I don't SWIM! Period! Not even n a pool!

You can also follow Eric Freeman on Twitter at @freemaneric.

There are very, very few music/sports crossovers that are not exceedingly embarrassing. Take, for instance, the terrific "Just Say No" rap by the 1987 Los Angeles Lakers, featuring the best in '80s casualwear and some fresh rhymes by everyone from James Worthy to Pat Riley. It's an artifact of another time, the sort of thing that must have seemed like a good idea 25 years ago but now just seems like the product of different sensibilities and, ironically, too many drugs.

So, if I were to tell you that the New Jersey rap trio Naughty by Nature produced a full promotional video using adapted lyrics of their hit "Hip Hop Hooray" for the 1993-94 Washington Bullets, it's a fair assumption that it would be totally ridiculous. I mean, the combination of Treach, Tom Gugliotta dancing, and lyrics about the on-court exploits of Harvey Grant would seem to prove as much. It should be instant laffs, right?

Getting an office gig with a sports team is no sure thing. Though the Brooklyn Nets recently relocated from New Jersey, the team is likely to keep most of its staff even with the move into the Big Apple. There aren't a lot of openings to be found, we're guessing, but if you're a big enough fan of the team to actually recognize its CEO (not its famous owner or more-famous co-owner, or very public GM) after he enjoys some delicious sushi, then you're probably well on your way. Especially if you're of intern age, you study economics and finance in college, and the CEO is giving you a tour of the team's offices while a promotional video team films it.

Nets fan and future intern Vivek Shah took in a good bit of kismet following his on the street recognition of Brooklyn Nets CEO Brett Yormark, in June. Watch, via Nets Daily and The Basketball Jones, Shah touring the Nets' offices and being offered the internship:

It's a lesson for the kids. Ignore the team's star point guard and well-respected coach, but memorize the head shots in suits and ties in the team's game program. You might get an internship and sweet jacket (sorry, "sick gear") out of it.

Arron Afflalo, deep in thought. (AP)

The media could ask Arron Afflalo whatever they wanted during the press conference introducing him as a member of the Orlando Magic; he, and he alone, would be asking the truly meaningful questions.

Best caption wins some important advice that Afflalo might find just as relevant today as it was 20 years ago. Good luck. (You'll need it, Arron.)

In our last adventure: Kevin Love remains on that sneak tip.

Jay-Z speaks to a very famous African-American in a black uniform (Getty Images)

So, this is an odd one. In detailing Brooklyn Nets part-owner Jay-Z's influence on the team he has a financial stake in; the New York Times dropped a strange little bombshell that we can't quite get over. Does the NBA prefer to eschew black uniforms because it thinks its African-American players (who make up nearly three-quarters of the league) look bad in black on TV? One source, acting as the go-between in the middle of the Nets (who are wearing black and white uniforms in their first season in Brooklyn) and the league thinks so.

From the Times:

"[Jay-Z] helped design the team logos and choose the team's stark black-and-white color scheme, and personally appealed to National Basketball Association officials to drop their objections to it (the N.B.A., according to a person with knowledge of the discussion, thought that African-American athletes did not look good on TV in black, an assertion that a league spokesman adamantly denied). He counseled arena executives on what kind of music to play during games. ("Less Jersey," he urged, pushing niche artists like Santigold over old favorites like Bon Jovi.)"

Whether your taste in apparel runs toward teal "EVERY DAMN DAY" T-shirts, track pants and crew socks that make you look sort of like a grampa when worn with sneakers and shorts, or (like mine) away from that, I think we can all agree that in an Internet marketplace overflowing with swing-and-a-miss advertising attempts to convince us that athletes are funny, one that actually produces a legitimate laugh is worth sharing with the world. And so, we bring to you Oklahoma City Thunder point guard Russell Westbrook squeezing mustard at teammate James Harden (in what looks like a hotel's outdoor lounge, which is weird) to legitimate comic effect, thanks to a high-quality kicker.

Bravo, Thunderers, and bravo, Foot Locker. We only hope that the coup de grâce was CGI-based; we'd hate for disposable beard covers to lose their usefulness.

Vanessa Bryant before (on left), and after (right, in red) (Getty Images)

We read it, so you don't have to. Kobe Bryant's wife Vanessa has clearly had some cosmetic surgery, recently, but she swears it's just regular cosmetic surgery, and not "trying to keep Kobe Bryant on the farm"-cosmetic surgery.

From the Daily Mail:

Her representatives have blasted the allegations as '100 per cent not true' and 'ridiculous'.

During her appearance at the London Olympic Games, the 30-year-old set tongues wagging that she had undergone surgery after pictures of her looking rather different from her former self emerged.

A source told The National Enquirer that Vanessa was starting to feel 'insecure' about her looks and 'would do anything to keep Kobe happy.'