Watch Mechanics

The Watch Snob On The Essence Of Watchmaking

Page: 1

Sinn

The Watch Snob is in.

A Lesson In Watchmaking Mechanics

Dear Snob,

May I ask your opinion of Sinn’s patented DIAPAL technology, which is used to extend the service life of mechanical watches without lubrication checks? Does DIAPAL suggest the potential for a genuine advance in horological engineering?

Let’s break down the basic goal of watchmaking, shall we? The primary objective is to tell time and, one hopes, to tell it as accurately and precisely as possible. Accuracy and precision are the same thing, you say? Not in the world of watchmaking. Accuracy is a watch’s ability to tell the time at any given moment. But, as the pithy saying goes, even a broken watch is accurate twice a day. But precision is the watch’s ability to be accurate over a long period of time and through a variety of conditions.

The second thing to know is that friction is the enemy of precise timekeeping, as it is the enemy of many other things, from automotive engines to certain sexual proclivities. In a watch, the pallets of the balance assembly are in constant contact with the balance wheel and over time simply wear out, which affects the rate. The usual solution to this is to keep the pallets lubricated, but that only lasts so long. Naturally this sort of thing doesn’t sit well with the Germans, who view it as a flaw in the system and an opportunity for overengineering. And we know how much the Germans like to overengineer things.

Sinn’s DIAPAL (“DIAmond PALlet”) technology amounts to using the hardest substance on earth for the pallets in the balance assembly, hence thumbing its Teutonic noses at friction. Of course, while the Germans are good at engineering things, their ability to come up with flashy names for their technology is a little lacking. Maybe they should have brought in the French to brainstorm the branding. On second thought, that’s not a good idea.

The Everest Watch Controversy

Snob,

I couldn’t help but think of you when I read about Kobold’s troubles with its Everest watch. Apparently the dial is made from rocks Mike Kobold collected from Mount Everest and the government of Nepal is not happy. What do you think of this controversy and what do you think in general of watch parts made from rare objects like the Titanic or meteorites?

I have followed the Everest watch controversy with some detached amusement. Though I don’t deign to be a writer, I see a sort of metaphor in this story: The American watch brand with its quasi-military bluster conquering the foreign mountain, bringing back its booty and then selling it under the auspices of gratitude. Stallone could play Mr. Kobold in the movie version of this tale, if he could part ways with his Panerai for a while.

As for the use of rare materials in watches, I care little about such gimmicks. Call me old-fashioned, but I prefer that watchmakers pay more attention to what’s inside the case.

As for the Kobold Everest, I’m guessing that is not the watch Mr. Kobold will be sending me to assess. Speaking of that, I’m still waiting.

Question from a Watch Knob

OK, I did it. After months of reading your opinions, I sold my solid gold Rolex and bought one. Yes, you are right. It's exquisite. Nothing else I wear no matter how costly gives me as much pleasure, confidence and a sense of wonder just knowing what's going on inside it. I wear it every chance I get, but maybe I’m not worthy of it as I sheepishly hide it in my sleeve until I reach my destination and then pull back my sleeve slightly just in case there's someone around with some level of sophistication. Occasionally there are, and with this watch, I never get the normal raised eyebrow or an "I'm impressed" smile that I get with any of my other watches. With this, the few who recognize it just drop their jaw, rush over, grab my wrist and ask, "Is this a..." They always stop and wait for me to fill in the blank, and there's nothing more embarrassing than owning one, appreciating one, being able to afford one but not being able to fill in that bloody blank. So how on earth do you pronounce A. Lange & Söhne?

If you are wearing an A. Lange & Söhne, you can pronounce it however you damn well please. But to be safe, “Long and Sons” will do, lest you be accused of being, well, a Watch Snob.

OK, I’m feeling charitable today. It’s “lahng-uh und zone-uh.” You’re welcome.