Enema Play

When Is A Fetish "Weird"?

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Enema Play

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Is This Some Weird Fetish?


Hi Doc,

While looking at some porn tube sites, I came across something that was kind of hot and kind of disturbing. There was a video with a girl having, like, milk or cream put inside of her butt with a tube, and then she pushed it out. At first I was like, "gross," but watching it got more and more interesting. Is this some weird fetish? I found it in the regular porn section, not the crazy section.

- Mark

Nah, I wouldn’t say what you saw is weird, but I would ask for some cookies with that milk. They go together. What you came across in your porn surfing is a kinky sexual behavior called enema play. For the more technical term to impress your friends, it’s a paraphilia called klismaphilia. If I was grading papers, I would’ve crossed out some of the adjectives you used like "weird" and "gross" and replaced them with "different" and "unique." You’d be surprised at the popularity of enema play for both sexual and arousal purposes or for preparation for penetrative anal play. Originally, enemas were intended for colon and rectal cleansing, but anytime there’s butt play going on for medical purposes, some kinksters are going to eroticize it, slap on some lube, use their imagination and turn it kinky.

In addition, you’ll find a wide variety of liquids that people enjoy placing inside the rectum. It doesn’t stop with milk; water, coffee and more is used, and individuals enjoy different temperatures of the liquid. Milk is an interesting choice. From a psychological perspective, milk has multiple meanings for people. For some, it may signify childhood and innocence, or milk may have an ejaculation or cream pie significance. Others may simply like anything to do with ass play, and as long as the butt is involved, they’re aroused. Why would someone enjoy this, you ask? That’s the million-dollar question with sexual behaviors, and we may never know the answer.

Sometimes it's more important to work with what you’ve got rather than seek out the origins. For those who have this kink wired into their brains, there are a lot of ways to explore enema play safely and with kinktelligence. I’d encourage folks interested to read Intimate Invasion by MR Strict for a beginner's guide to erotic enema play. Also, there are communities online where people can find support, like enemata.com, fetlife.com and enemaloversguide.com, as well as plenty of sites where people trade erotic enema stories.

Checking Out Coworkers

I’ve been caught a few times by coworkers checking out their butts and cleavage. But I don’t get why, if women supposedly like to be wanted and be desired, that this is bad. You said this in an old article. So why wouldn’t they like it when I check them out? I get dirty looks. Isn’t it the ultimate compliment?

- Stefano

I’m going to try and save you from a lifetime of strikeouts and rejection.
Most people check out those they are attracted to. It’s human nature to seek out positive visual stimuli. Of course, there are some women who enjoy being checked out or someone honking the horn at them. They like the attention and enjoy it. Many women prefer something a bit more subtle, like a glance or eye contact and a smile. And for most women, having their body parts checked out is less complimentary and more degrading or objectifying. How we check people out makes a world of difference. What are you trying to say? What is the message you’re trying to convey? Decide that and then try using your words. Women like when guys use words. Compliments that compliment are much more effective that ones that make her feel like a piece of meat and make you look creepy. Next Page >>

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By Dr. Hernando Chaves Dr. Hernando Chaves
Dr. Hernando Chaves is a clinical sexologist and sex coach in Beverly Hills, CA. He is a professor of human sexuality at the college level and holds degrees in psychology, marriage and family therapy and human sexuality. Dr. Chaves is a public speaker with national and international experience and believes kinky is more fun...
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