Lunch Turns Into Lecture Over Co-Worker's Big Tip

Grossed out -- DO NOT MARRY THE SLOB. He sounds like my ex-husband... who claimed to have all kinds of good intentions and never changed an iota. RUN, do not walk. Cameron will expect you to be his Mommy and pick up after him.

I wonder what would happen if LW#1 got together for lunch with the gentleman who kept thanking all the waitstaff, much to the chagrin of his lady.

LW#1 - Your co-worker is cheap. Seeing you leave a large tip made her feel bad about herself so she decided to tear you down to try to assuage her feelings of inadequacy.

L#1 Reminded me of the hotel we just stayed at......we stayed one night and in the morning I asked where the tip evelope was.....So I left a tip, my son who has his first job doing kitchen work and deliveries walked by an equaled what we left.....He said 'Mom, I do dishes, and I don't always get tips for delivery....that lady has to clean toilets/showers and make my bed, I won't ever forget what others are doing and appreciate it.....' when my younger son saw it he got ready to say something before he could my oldest cut him off 'You'll get a job in a few years, just you wait until it's your turn. And next time mom asked you to do a chore, shut up and do it without the whining about it, I wish I had of.'....... he's a good man, I can't call him a boy anymore :)

#2 - The Magic 8 Ball says "He has no problem living in a clean home as long as you're willing to do ALL the cleaning. If not, I see roaches in both your futures".

LW1 Here's a tip for the friend, "stop being an idiot" . And, I just want to go on record as saying that anyone may feel free at any time to degrade me by giving my large sums of money. I can handle it. Really. I'll be okay with that. Degrade away. Lots of money is my kind of degradation. Cash, checks, money orders, gift cards...I can be sufficiently degraded by any of them.

I waited tables on and off for much of my adult life. I put my self through school waiting tables and made ends meet when I was laid off. Trust me - I never once felt degraded when I was left a big tip. LW1's coworker is cheap and rude and I recommend never socializing with that person again.

"He says he'll be neater when we're married."
Haaahahahahaha!!! Let me guess...he also says these gems:
"She's just a friend."
"I'll just put in for a second, then pull it out"
"Sorry. I must have left my wallet at home."
"I'll call you."

LW#1 - "What I leave for a tip is nobody's business but my own." Learn it, repeat it when necessary.

LW#1: I had something similar happen. I went to lunch with some co-workers & left a generous tip because I was very happy with the food & service...when one of my co-workers saw the tip I left, she took her tip off the table & said that she didn't need to tip since I tipped so much. I never went to lunch with that person again.

To this day, I try to tip at least enough to buy a gallon of gas, regardless of my bill's total because I always think the tip might be the difference between whether or not someone can get to work/home. If I'm so broke that I can't leave a decent tip, then I don't need to be dining out anyway.

I think your office co-worker is sniffing paint or something. ;)

I was a bartender at a VFW when I was in my early 20's and was working toward my master's. A guy named Earl used to stop in every so often to have a tall fountain Coke at the bar. He was a single Vietnam vet who just came out to be sociable and have some conversation. He always left me a nice tip but one time he gave me $20, said "Put that in your gas tank", and then walked out the door. His Coke only cost $0.90. Like Abby said, I didn't feel degraded, only thankful.

On what planet is a big tip "degrading"?! Opposite world?!

Only a loser would make a scene about leaving a large tip.

I think the only person degraded by LW#1's actions is the co-worker!

LW #1 - GENEROUS IN CONNECTICUT - I would never go to lunch with that co-worker again. I'd pretty much write them off, period.

LW#1 - Accept that you are the housekeeper, and don't be surprised when Mr. Right works against you to make the place even dirtier. If you are going to work full time after the wedding, see about having a cleaning person help out once every two weeks or so. The price will be worth your sanity.

LW2 - forget the mess. This is what you need to worry about, "I have tried to talk to him about it, but he gets angry and says that it's his place." Reall? He gets angry about this? Either he's got a short fuse over minor stuff or you're not approaching him very well or too often. This is what Cameron is....a slob. Figure out how to get crazy about picking up after him or reevaluate your plans. He and, you will not change just because you're married.

LW1- Coworker is mad that you showed her up. And she's stupid rude to make a scene over it.

LW1--I think Abby hit the nail on the head; your co-worker was being cheap, and wanted you to join her so she wouldn't be the only one leaving a bad tip. Of course, the fact that she felt the need to look at your tip in the first place was incredibly rude. Next time this happens (assuming you're willing to dine with her again), why don't you suggest calling the waiter over to see which tip is "degrading"; that will probably shut her up realy quick.

LW#1 - Your co-worker is not worried about the server or you. Your co-worker is worried that your large tip makes them look bad. The co-worker made a huge stink trying to make you look bad so no one else will think that they are cheap. I'm telling ya, if someone protests too much, it is about them...not about you.