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[+] are we able to separate the mmr? i have three children. my twins are almost a year ... 10 replies
- me! the only real reason to be careful about vaccinating is if there is an immunological issue. but has anybody...babies to that, fine. Please do not think that delaying vaccinations is risk-free. I personally know a mother who delayed an..., or whatever, but I believe you can get separated vaccines in some countries because some countries do not require MMR. I do believe they use a different kind of vaccine/strain and some of those may be problematic. Get with...
Talk : : June 10, 2011
are we able to separate the mmr? i have three children. my twins are almost a year old and one is showing significant signs of delay. both are delayed but one is clearly more than the other. i'm taking one for tests to rule out seizures. i would like to hold off on the immunizations. is there a way that we can have them spaced out. i think in london they administer the measles and rubella separately. thanks!
10 replies [ Reply | Watch | More06.10.11, 07:51 PM Flag ]i'm just not sure if it's even available in the states. i may be "crazy" for no reason, but i'm seeing things with one and i don't see how it can hurt to hold off and if possible separate. i did not do this with my eldest but i did not question her development either.
[ Reply | More ]06.10.11, 07:56 PM Flag
you can ask your ped, but i don't think that is an option anymore... if your child is experiencing delays, though, one of the worst things that could happen is for them to experience a serious illness like measles or mumps. please consult a developmental ped if you don't believe me! the only real reason to be careful about vaccinating is if there is an immunological issue. but has anybody indicated that is the case? good luck!
[ Reply | More ]06.10.11, 08:31 PM FlagThere is no scientific evidence to support your approach. There is currently a measles outbreak in NYC. If you feel comfortable exposing your babies to that, fine. Please do not think that delaying vaccinations is risk-free. I personally know a mother who delayed an immunization and her 15 mos dd ended up in Columbia-Presbyterian Hospital for 10 days with meningitis. You really want to risk this with your babies?
[ Reply | More ]06.11.11, 03:46 AM FlagI don't know if you travel to Europe to see family, or whatever, but I believe you can get separated vaccines in some countries because some countries do not require MMR. I do believe they use a different kind of vaccine/strain and some of those may be problematic. Get with a DAN or alternative ped/MD and they can help you sort this out (meaning whether you can separate or should or should not wait).
[ Reply | More ]06.11.11, 04:49 AM Flag
[+] The religious exemptions from vaccinating requirements needs to be eliminated. If yo... 4 replies
Talk : : June 09, 2011
The religious exemptions from vaccinating requirements needs to be eliminated. If you want to be a non-vaxing Christian, Jew, witch, atheist, whatever, by all means, go for it. But if you want to be part of the world, you vax. If you don't want to vax, you can live miles away from other people, way off the grid, and home-school.
4 replies [ Reply | Watch | More06.09.11, 12:36 PM Flag ]
[+] So annoyed right now. Just found out SIL is not planning to vaccinate. WTF! 119 replies
- I posted above about wanting to not vaccinate while pregnant. Basically, many parents choose not to vaccinate...of getting diseases exists for babies. Are YOU stupid? Vaccinate them, the earlier the better! Your darling baby can...chemotherapy at FURTHER risk of death by not vaccinating our perfectly healthy children, and then having those...writing erroneous things. She doesn't believe in vaccinating children. And it just goes downhill from there....
Talk : : June 09, 2011
So annoyed right now. Just found out SIL is not planning to vaccinate. WTF!
119 replies [ Reply | Watch | More06.09.11, 07:06 AM Flag ]Tell her your children won't be able to play with her children.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:06 AM FlagTell her she will have zero interaction with her niece/nephew. It probably won't change her mind, but that way you are warning her and she cannot hold it against you in the future that she doesn't see them.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:10 AM Flagthat doesn't make any sense because if OP's kids are vaccinated, they are protected. it's SIL's kids that are at risk anywhere they go.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:13 AM Flaga vaccination isnt foolproof and part of the reason it works is because of the herd effect. while sil is taking a bigger risk w/ her own kids, she is also, to a lesser extent, taking the risk for those around her children. and frankly, it's unbelievably selfish.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:16 AM Flagpp: ITA. When I was preg, I was VERY VERY Obsessed w/ vaccine and was SURE I wasn't going to vaccinate. Then my dd was born and the real world hit and I thought... if she gets measles b/c I was an ass, I'll never forgive myself. Also knew that I would be contributing to the abundance of stupid parents who are helping diseases that have been near obsolete return. We vaccinate, just one shot at a time :)
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:23 AM Flagthe measles are only really dangerous to pg women. Very small risk to cause sterility in males. Everyone got them in before the vaccine. I'm not anti-vaccine - but people need to come down to earth. Not everything we vaccinate against is deadly. Most is pretty much eradicated - measles are one of the only things that still pop up from time to time. I do vaccinate my kids fully - I just get annoyed when people are misinformed - on both sides of the spectrum.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 08:02 AM FlagIm sorry but you are mistaken. How about you tell the parents who have children that have gotten very sick from measles that it's only 'really dangerous' to pregnant women. Also, polio: killed MANY people... Hep: again!... tetanus: hello?.... whooping cough: really, need I go on? The only ones not deadly are the elective ones: Roto, chx pox, flu and even those can make children VERY sick.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 08:09 AM FlagKids can get very sick from lots of things - measles is rarely deadly - the flu can be deadly - crossing the street can be deadly - you need to put things in perspective. Measles can leave a male sterile and can be severe for a pg woman. It's no different from chicken pox otherwise. Roto and chicken pox aren't elective in many places - wish the pox was elective - that's the only one I'd decline for my kids. There hasn't been a case of polio in the US in ages and -again- I am all for vaccines - just like to inform myself of the actual risks and diseases. Roto is a bad tummy ache. Of course I don't want my kids to get it and I vaccinate - but it's not deadly in a healthy child.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 09:49 AM Flagyour child may leave the us in the future, or be around people who have travelled. polio is no joke.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 09:51 AM FlagRoto can cause dehydration and death also. But yeah, it's mainly like a real bad stomach virus. So why not give your baby a shot to avoid 2 weeks of stomach virus misery and possible dehydration??
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 12:55 PM Flagnp: do you know why the roto vax has been out less than 5 years? bc the old one had to be stopped bc it was causing severe intestinal problems. these vaccines are new and only the short term impacts have been studied. roto vax is not a short btw it's oral and the risk of getting rotovirus for a BF baby not in daycare is extremely low. so why add 3 more doses of a not that well tested concoction to my young baby? i did it for my younger on ebut i totally get why someone would skip it.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 01:02 PM Flagour ped said pre-vax he had 1 kid in the hospital every other year bec of roto. post-vax, none.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 01:30 PM Flaginteresting. intussusception was caused by a vaccine? i had it a 5 mos old in the 60s. I'm the only child in my family who was baptized in our nonreligious family as a result. The old catholic fear kicked in and my parents baptized me in case I didn't make it out of surgery. Needless to say, I made it!
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 05:52 PM Flag
omg that's so dangerous. Did you hear of the 3 new MEASLES cases...2 older ppl and one toddler. None have been abroad so it's being spread here. That's 13 cases since January
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:07 AM Flagnp--Here's a NYC link: http://gothamist.com/2011/06/08/oh_no_theres_a_measles_outbreak_and.php
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:09 AM Flag-
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Why can't parents of those newborns who caught whooping cough in the CA outbreak sue him in civil court? Class action lawsuit. They should attempt it, and include wacko narcissistic Jenny McCarthy in the lawsuit too. Take every penny she has. Everybody needs to speak up. The one thing that may end this nonsense is to make it socially unacceptable, by encouraging everybody to stop being quietly politically correct (like the media is about the issue due to the celebrity factor) and instead speak out strongly against the practice and not just anonymously on the internet.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 11:18 AM Flag
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no. if it's op's SIL it totally has an impact on OP. now HER children will be hanging out with their cousins who will be unvaccinated. that's utterly ridiculous.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:12 AM Flag-
OP - I told her the kids won't be allowed to play with each other until they are about 5. I've still got a little time to try and convince her. Anyone out there not vaccinate? Can you tell me why?
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:20 AM Flagand honestly, you should ask her how she plans to manage family gatherings until that time. (although, honestly, i'm not sure why the age matters...) why don't you get out a calendar with her and ask her which ones she will attend and which ones you will attend.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:26 AM FlagI posted above about wanting to not vaccinate while pregnant. Basically, many parents choose not to vaccinate b/c a) they are concerned b/c of the side effects and b) they think our bodies 'can fight off things naturally.' It's usually an over educated UMC white family, I hate to say it. We fit into that group :(, but we eventually snapped out of it and realized that it's nice to think that we can not vaccinate b/c we're scared, but its part of life and 'has to be done.' Also, isn't it the case that dcs cannot go to public school if not vaccinated?
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:28 AM Flag
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She is putting everyone elses kids at risk too. Nit just hers, not g
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:59 AM FlagWhat about my nephew, who has leukemia (very immunocompromised) and can't be vaccinated with live vaccines like the MMR right now? And if he catches measles from this OP's niece/nephew, his immune system is not strong enough to fight it off like other people's, so he will be dangerously sick, if not dead, if he catches it. He RELIES on herd immunity. People like OP's SIL are just taking selfish advantage of herd immunity for their own convenience. And it will lead to increases in measles cases (among other diseases) and if my nephew or another immunocompromised cancer child catches it because of decreased herd immunity, I hope she can still sleep at night.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 12:58 PM Flag
Yes, I am a healthcare worker and just received an email alert from department of health about measles cases in NYC. 13 total, 3 of them kids. We have been instructed to isolate anyone who comes in with febrile rash.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:23 AM FlagUGH we just got the same letter in Maryland today (only one case nearby, luckily). Annoyed at the ridiculous isolation procedures we'll have to do now (for good reason, though, of course). Can't people just get over themselves and vaccinate their precious snowflakes? Your kid is not going to catch the autism from the vaccine, that has been widely disproven in multiple studies, has it not?
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 01:00 PM Flag
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As the poster above wrote - she's worried about side effects and THINKS that our bodies can fight off infection successfully. Mind you she has no medical degree. I'm sure that some family in India would love her vaccines.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:45 AM Flagshe realy doesn't understand the measles, polio, whooping cough can kill?
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:50 AM FlagAnd even if her own kids survive, someone elses kids might not because of her selfish mentality. For vaccines to work, everyone that can must participate. It's called herd immunity. If there is one thing modern medicine has done right it's the eradication of childhood diseases that used cause tremendous suffering and death.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:58 AM Flag
My mother was against vaccinating so I don't see the big deal. I got the chicken pox but was otherwise healthy. And because I know you will ask, yes I vaccinated but I did it on a delayed schedule, I do not feel comfortable give a newborn a vaccine. Both my DC's wil be completly up to date by K. DD was up to date by age 4, but DS will not have his MMR until K. Go ahead flame on.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:40 AM Flag-
OP - Can you explain to me why? This is not a flame. I'm really trying to understand what evidence there is to show that you shouldn't vaccinate your child other than a bogus study that's been debunked a million times over. And for the record - I also had chicken pox and if someone told me I didn't have to have it by getting a shot believe me I would have taken it.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:48 AM Flagnot or... there are millions of cases of children being 'injured' by vaccines and yes it really does happen. Things like allergic shock, fever so high it results in comas, actually getting the disease you are vaccinating against, etc. These things happen and like I said above it's these cases that scare parents into not getting the shots. When I was considering not vaccinating, I looked at the odds of getting the disease and dying from it or dying from the vaccine. We got the vaccines. Also, many parents believe there is a link to autism and vaccines.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:53 AM FlagNP: I think there may be a little confusion about vaccine injury. When somebody believes their child has a vaccine injury, the court does not typically rule on whether or not the injury actually occurred because of the vaccine. This is virtually impossible to demonstrate, and it would hang up cases in the court system forever. So these cases are just paid for out of a lump sum meant to deal with vaccine injuries. Payment does not mean that the injury was "determined" to be due to vaccines. It is a strange system.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 06:00 PM Flag
Most people do not feel children that their children should be injected with the extra chemicals used to make vaccines. There have also been others whose children or know of children who have had very bad allergic reactions to vaccines. I started vaccinating DS at age 18mo and his first 2 vaccines swelled up his legs for 3mo, and he ran a fever for a week after. For me that was enough to postpone his next vaccine until 24mo and then he will still only get one at a time. There have been lots of studies done that show vaccines can be harmful to some DC's at a young age, even if say half are bogus this is enough for me to postpone it until I feel their bodies are better able to deal with it.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:56 AM FlagI almost forgot you should send her the Dr. Sears book on vaccines which advocates for delayed vaccine she will probably be more receiving of this than telling her to vaccinate her newborn.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:58 AM FlagParaphrase: Some parents are stupid, but insist on thinking they are much, much smarter than everyone else.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:59 AM Flag
np: the long term health consequences of the current vax schedule (which is far greater than what we got as kids) have not been studied, but there is growing evidence that it is seriously impacting the way our bodies' immune and neurological systems function in the long term. i don't see why people think it's such a stretch that if you inject people with many substances in order to stimulate their immune response a certain way, it might also trigger other unintended immune responses down the road - like the increase in autoimmune disorders.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 01:08 PM Flag
My DC's don't start until 4, they take group activities like little gym throughout the week. It is a state law that you don't have to vaccinate for public schools, but their is a special form you have to fill out.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 07:50 AM FlagWhat do your "feelings" have to do with anything in making such an important decision. Yeah I'm going to flame you. Because there's no difference between you going all anti-science in deciding not to vaccinate, and the right wing creationist crazies who reject all science all because of their strong "feelings". What is this world coming to. It's the dark ages all over again.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 11:08 AM Flag-
Not to most people, but to immunocompromised kids it is a very big deal. I know, let's put all of the children getting chemotherapy at FURTHER risk of death by not vaccinating our perfectly healthy children, and then having those children pass chicken pox onto some poor child who is in desperate need of some herd immunity.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 03:42 PM Flag
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And still her right. You do know there are children injured by the MMR right? Read a little about vaccine court.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 08:01 AM Flagnp: And people are hurt by airbags. But disabling them for an adult in the front seat would still be stupid.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 08:15 AM FlagBut you disable them for a child in the front seat. So that argument was useless.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 10:25 AM FlagNP: They are disarmed because airbags are not designed to provide the same level of safety to children. It is a totally valid analogy.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 10:28 AM FlagRight, it balances for the greater good- not the individual case. But a person may be concerned about their own individual case and not herd immunity. There are injuries that arise from vaccines and the law says each individual can balance these risks for themselves in the case of vaccines.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 10:54 AM Flag
I read all there is to read (was against MMR initially, then changed my mind) and completely disagree wtih you. But then again, there were people who were against all vaccines at one time or another. I guess you can't help that some people are irrational.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 09:15 AM FlagExcuse me, I am rational and an MD and I resent the implication that any logical educated person would not have concerns. And I vaccinated on a modified schedule.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 10:26 AM FlagI am also a pediatrician and I have never, ever met another respected physician who believed in a modified vaccination schedule. Yes, some of us do it while grinding our teeth because parents insist, but nobody actually believes that it is a good way to go. I am very suspicious that you are truly a medical doctor.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 03:44 PM FlagI will resist the obvious joke about this is how you landed in peds, but I will say that my kids pedi says I am typical for his dr. Parents in that I try to direct care. Unless you were their child's pedi, there would be no reason for a random cardiologist or surgeon to tell you this, we know the official position.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 06:10 PM Flag
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Question (I really don't know, that's why I am asking): If your kids are vaccinated and playing with unvaccinated kids, isn't it the unvaccinated kids who are at risk?
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 09:16 AM FlagVaccines aren't 100%, the whole point of mandatory vaccination is to increase herd immunity so that there will be fewer (or no) outbreaks where people who are vaxed could still get sick. Our nanny is from W Africa and comes from a MC urban family there where everyone was vaxed, but people she knew still got sick bc it's far from universal in some regions. It is very interesting to hear the perspective of someone who has SEEN polio, measles, etc.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 09:34 AM FlagYeah. The vaxed kids aren't at much risk and actually, because most people do vax, the risk to unvaxed and otherwise healthy kids is really small--they most likely can fight off an infection. But frail or elderly aren't so able to fight off the infections. So the unvaxed pretty much benefit from everyone else's immunity, while increasing risk to others.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 12:15 PM Flag
Hey OP. Send your SIL a couple of YouTube links of children with whooping cough. This ought to change her mind real quick! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wuvn-vp5InE
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 10:24 AM FlagITA. Google "The Sound of Pertussis" and you'll hear a little infant gasping for breath, valiantly trying to survive. Anyone could listen to that and not get the vax is heartless. Even if that baby survived, why put it through such suffering? Would submit yourself to the same?
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 12:07 PM Flag-
NP My totally vaccinated ds got RSV at age 2. It is really common. Sucked but he was not a newborn so just very sick and miserable, but not terrifying, race to the ER sick. I am 100 percent for vaccines, both kids totally on schedule, but not sure there is a vaccine for RSV
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 12:17 PM FlagThere is but it is VERY expensive. Every year kids die of RSV.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 12:18 PM Flagit's only covered by insurance for kids w health conditions that make RSV more dangerous to them. it's not on the mandatory schedule.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 01:10 PM FlagCorrect, and yet every year seemingly healthy children get RSV and are hospitalized and/or die. It is a financial decision, not one based on the best interests of your child. Interesting, isn't it?
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 01:12 PM Flagall vax are about money - the reason so many are on the mandatory schedule is so that pharmaceutical companies can make money. don't worry RSV will be there soon enough. if your kid is the one with RSV it's traumatic, but no more so than if your kid is the one with the vax injury.
[ Reply | More ]06.09.11, 01:14 PM Flag
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[+] 10 y/o ds is going to sleep away camp for two weeks in July. Ped does not advocate gi... 9 replies
- lasted 10 years. Since younger kids are more likely to be taken to the doctor and vaccinated than older kids, they figured 11 would be a good age to vaccinate at. Now we know coverage drops off right when kids need it (as college freshmen), so we do boosters...
- Is there a downside to getting the vaccine early? I mean some reason they are against it? otherwise if it is just "normally...
Talk : : June 06, 2011
10 y/o ds is going to sleep away camp for two weeks in July. Ped does not advocate giving meningitis vaccine until 11 but ds' friends have received the shot and many people support getting it if any sleep away camp is planned. DOH for NY & NJ both suggest age 11. All that said I'm leery because older ds' frat house in college was ground zero for a meningitis outbreak two years ago. Am I being overly cautious? tia!
9 replies [ Reply | Watch | More06.06.11, 06:01 PM Flag ]I really and truly wouldn't worry about giving him the shot. For whatever reason, babies and college kids are the typical epicenters of meningitis outbreaks. He'll be fine at sleepaway camp for two weeks :)
[ Reply | More ]06.06.11, 06:05 PM Flag-
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OR from above: It's because they want the kid to be protected through the teen years, and they used to think coverage lasted 10 years. Since younger kids are more likely to be taken to the doctor and vaccinated than older kids, they figured 11 would be a good age to vaccinate at. Now we know coverage drops off right when kids need it (as college freshmen), so we do boosters around age 18.
[ Reply | More ]06.06.11, 06:14 PM Flag
[+] My SIL is visiting with my nephew. My nephew has chickenpox and my dd is 4 months. My... 18 replies
- get encephalitis from it-brain infection, which is why we vaccinate now. Bright side: if she gets it u don...your nephew has chicken pox, didn't he get vaccinated?...
- : you can still get it even with the vaccine (can get a mild version)....
- They are visiting from the UK. They don't vaccinate there....
- anything. No good dr. will give a live vaccine under 1....
Talk : : June 04, 2011
My SIL is visiting with my nephew. My nephew has chickenpox and my dd is 4 months. My other SIL (an MD) says to keep them apart, minimum of 6 feet. I think that is ridiculous since it is airborne. I took my dd to Emerg to see if she could get the vaccine and they said nothing they can do if she isn't showing symptoms. WWYD? Is it that bad for an infant to get chickenpox? TIA!
18 replies [ Reply | Watch | More06.04.11, 10:16 PM Flag ]If he has already shown symptoms he is not contagious. Also, the younger you get chicken pox the less severe the reaction. My 6 week old got it (thanks to my older 2) and it basically was a few bumps and over. Not even close to the drama of stuffy noses or something. I understand it worrying you,though! Just wanted to throw my experience out there for thought.
[ Reply | More ]06.05.11, 05:18 AM Flagkeep them apart. So weird that your nephew has chicken pox, didn't he get vaccinated?
[ Reply | More ]06.05.11, 05:46 AM FlagHere in the UK they don't do the vaccine, we let our kids get chicken 'in the wild' Some people even have chicken pox parties so they're exposed when younger as the symptoms are mild and life long immunity is developed from exposure. My DD1 bought CP home from Nursery when she was 4 and gave it to her sister at 9mths. Many babies have it earlier, its only considered a big risk in a young newborn. At 4 mths, i wouldn't worry too much.
[ Reply | More ]06.05.11, 07:55 AM FlagWhy on earth would your SIL put you and your daughter in this situation? 4 months is still really young. If your SIL won't do the right thing and leave, then you need to go stay in a hotel. I agree, the staying 6 feet apart thing is ridiculous and will not work. And don't listen to the poster above who said that your nephew is not contagious. That's not true--I don't know why people post about important things when they don't know what they are talking about.
[ Reply | More ]06.05.11, 08:03 AM FlagI wouldn't worry about it - not severe if she gets it and keeping them apart in the same house isn't going to do anything. No good dr. will give a live vaccine under 1.
[ Reply | More ]06.05.11, 06:32 PM Flag
[+] There's new book out that tries to link peanut allergies with vaccines. I have always... 12 replies
- restaurants or shop in the grocery store. But what about the vaccine issue? If it catches on it will be like the fake autism link and even more parents won't vaccinate their dc....
- I would really hate to think there is another non-scientific reason for insane mothers not to vaccinate their children. We do not need whooping cough epidemics in...is actually claiming that there is peanut oil in the vaccine or something. She makes a connection between the two....
Talk : : June 03, 2011
There's new book out that tries to link peanut allergies with vaccines. I have always been of the opinion that except for a very few cases, the peanut allergy "epidemic" is overblown and fueled by drug manufacturers selling epi-pens to crazy mothers. What do you think?
12 replies [ Reply | Watch | More06.03.11, 06:01 PM Flag ]-
OP: I do. I have a niece and a nephew. But I have also done some research and it seems there are many parents who mistakenly believe all peanut allergies are fatal, and that their dc can never go near food without dying. That's simply not true in the vast majority of children.
[ Reply | More ]06.03.11, 06:05 PM Flag
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I agree. OP probably doesn't know anyone with a life-threatening peanut allergy, and you know why? Because there are hardly any.
[ Reply | More ]06.03.11, 06:08 PM FlagOP: agreed. I'm not even sure the extent to which my niece has it. My SIL is insane about her allergy, she actually told me my niece cannot eat in most restaurants or shop in the grocery store. But what about the vaccine issue? If it catches on it will be like the fake autism link and even more parents won't vaccinate their dc.
[ Reply | More ]06.03.11, 06:13 PM Flag
As in vaccines cause peanut allergies? I am an epidemiologist, and I have never heard this theory! I don't think there is any good evidence to support it, is there?
[ Reply | More ]06.03.11, 06:39 PM Flagop: I haven't read the book, I just read about it today. I think she is actually claiming that there is peanut oil in the vaccine or something. She makes a connection between the two.
[ Reply | More ]06.03.11, 06:46 PM FlagWell I haven't read the book, but it sounds like bs. The increase in peanut allergies is probably due to 1) an increase in diagnosis (allergies like this are notoriously difficult to diagnose in kids) and 2) an increase in allergies in general due to better hygiene in infancy.
[ Reply | More ]06.03.11, 06:49 PM Flag
I have a friend with no allergies and both of her kids have severe peanut allergies. She discovered this when she ate a peanut-butter sandwich and a few hours later, kissed her 8-mo son when he woke up from his nap. The shape of her lips blew up on his cheek, like a huge burn/welt and he stopped breathing within minutes. Rushed to the ER. It was awful. Luckily, no other allergies. Her younger daughter has it as well. They are both in public school (in FL) and she has to be super-careful about what they eat/are exposed to, and they are trained to give themselves shots (they carry epi-pens with them everywhere they go).
[ Reply | More ]06.03.11, 06:54 PM Flag
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[+] Be honest: do you judge fat people? 74 replies
- to feel better about yourself. It used to be black people (they're lazy! they're criminals!) and gay people (they have AIDS! they molest children!) and sometimes now it's still immigrants (they spread disease because they don't vaccinate! they don't have car insurance! they're criminals/lazy, etc.!). People always need someone to kick when they're down. Yeah, maybe your insurance went up because somebody's fat. Shit happens. You pay for other people every day,...
Talk : : June 01, 2011
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I am being honest - I am not the judge. I do not judge ANYBODY. That is not my responsiblity.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:18 PM Flag-
Ita. If someone is a bit chubby, I don't judge. I've struggled with food too, and sometimes you put on a few pounds. So, no, I don't judge someone who is 15 lbs overweight. But I do judge people who are obese. Just like I judge smokers and alcoholics. Yes, it's an illness, but it requires a certain degree of will power (as well as medical intervention) to overcome.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:20 PM Flagwhat's chubby to you or most of you? 5'4 and 160lbs? OR 5'4 130lbs. I'm guessing you will say the latter.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:23 PM Flaglatter. I'm 5'6" and over 120 I really start to notice it on my frame. I was once 140 and truly I was fat. So I know of what I speak.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:26 PM Flag5'6 and 140 is NOT FAT. You may have felt fat but that's truly not fat. That's like someone who says their HHI is 300k and they're poor. They're really not poor
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:28 PM FlagTotally wrong. 5'6" and 140 is considered overweight by your physician and by the American Heart Association. Unless you are extremely muscular, at that height and weight, your BMI is in the overweight category. It's not about looks. It's about health, and that is not considered a healthy weight. (Signed, MD).
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:34 PM FlagMD mom... that BMI is not in the overweight category, unless you misread her post to mean 140kg or something. Her BMI is 22.6, and overweight begins at 125. Need to go back to school, maybe?
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:42 PM Flaghttp://www.nhlbisupport.com/bmi/
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:44 PM Flagexactly. 22.6 is her BMI at 5 foot 6 inches as 140 pounds. which is normal. MD mom, what is your source exactly??? Glad you aren't my MD!
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:45 PM FlagPlease plug in 5'4" and 160. Those were the numbers that the OR provided. 5'4" and 160. Sorry I made a type with the 5'6", I was obviously replying to the OR.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:50 PM FlagOh, MD mom. The post was "latter. I'm 5'6" and over 120 I really start to notice it on my frame. I was once 140 and truly I was fat. So I know of what I speak." Then someone responded, "5'6 and 140 is NOT FAT." And then, after a couple more posters, you responded that 5'6 and 140 is considered overweight by the AHA. The 5'4 and 160 post was someone else.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 05:35 PM Flag
I think BMI is a pretty good guideline of what's overweight and what's chubby. Someone who is 5'4" and weighs 160lbs has a BMI of 27.5, which puts them into the overweight category. Unless that person is covered in muscles, I would guess that they are more in the category of "fat" rather than chubby.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:30 PM Flag
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Absolutely, fat people affect me by: having increase chance of diabetes , heart disease, joint replacements--My taxes pay for that, the environment_ more fuel to feed and transport fat people, I can go on. I would love the chance to pig out but instead I eat in moderation
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:21 PM FlagYes. I think it's socially irresponsible of them, because their personal choices impact our whole society. I group them in the same category as smokers.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:24 PM Flagbeing honest: I don't know too many obese people in NYC. In fact I can only think of one. And I wonder what is up: she doesn't have a car so she should get the same kind of getting around the city exercise that the rest of us do.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:28 PM Flagbe careful with judging or assumptions. I'm overweight, walk everywhere, don't eat red met or friend foods but I have chronic pain issues and this causes lack of proper exercise and also the meds put weight on. Not all of us "fatties" are constantly eating all day long. If I get 2 meals in a day that's a lot.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:30 PM Flag
If I see them drinking drinking soda and eating a big-mac, I do judge. I know there is a spectrum of issues that could cause someone to be overweight, including meds. But there's no illness that requires someone to eat at McDonalds (or other equally and notably crappy establishment). So, those people, I do judge. Because they are obviously refusing to make an effort.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:45 PM FlagNo. I actually finding it refreshing when I see a really confident person who is overweight. I know health=skinny so to see someone who doesn't allow societies definition to define who they are is a breath of fresh air.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:50 PM FlagUntil your insurance premiums start to skyrocket because of all those confident overweight people getting diabetes and heart disease.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 04:54 PM FlagYou do realize that there are healthy overweight people right? There are skinny people who aren't healthy and the same with overweight people. I am not overweight and I do think if weight is causing them health issues then they should make lifestyle changes to get healthy. But a number on a scale doesn't equal health.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 05:00 PM FlagYes, of course they are exceptions, but they are statistical outliers. There is a science behind a lot of this. Doctors and scientists aren't out to get fat people because of a personal grudge. Being overweight statistically increases the chances of a serious illness, such as diabetes and heart disease. Just because you know a healthy overweight black swan doesn't mean that we should ignore all the evidence and research.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 05:04 PM Flag
Yes, it's a social class issue. People of a higher social class are not fat.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 05:05 PM FlagSure, I think, that just sucks for them, but do I think they are less as humans, no. Perhaps, I do assume that they have some issues that contribute to it and wonder what they might be. Most people who are fat have some emotional or circumstantial issue that resulted in the fatness.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 06:06 PM FlagJudging fat people (they make my insurance go up! they take up too much space!) is just the latest socially acceptable way to hate someone in order to feel better about yourself. It used to be black people (they're lazy! they're criminals!) and gay people (they have AIDS! they molest children!) and sometimes now it's still immigrants (they spread disease because they don't vaccinate! they don't have car insurance! they're criminals/lazy, etc.!). People always need someone to kick when they're down. Yeah, maybe your insurance went up because somebody's fat. Shit happens. You pay for other people every day, and there are probably things you do that other people are paying for. Do you really think people would weigh 300 lbs and be social pariahs if it were a matter of simple will power to take the weight off? Do you think they would be the butt of jokes and victims of self-loathing if skipping McDonald's actually resulted in weight loss? Most of these people have long ago realized, after gaining weight through childhood and adolescence, that it takes superhuman effort to peel off 100 lbs and keep it off, and the whole time you're trying you still get the insults and disdain from everyone around you, so why bother?
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 07:23 PM Flag^^So, frankly, before you congratulate yourself self-righteously about things that were probably largely out of your control, like the culture and family you were raised in, the genes you've got, the resources you've got, and the fact that you are trying to maintain a weight and not lose a ton, maybe you should think about whether pissing all over people who catch shit from people constantly is really something you should be proud of.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 07:26 PM Flag
Absolutely. I don't understand how they can respect themselves, how they can like themselves or how they can justify not working harder to be a more agreeable weight. And I'm not talking about a few extra pounds (15lbs max), I'm talking people who make every step look like torture, or those who settle like Jabba the Hut on the subway.
[ Reply | More ]06.01.11, 08:15 PM Flag
[+] Moms with DCs in G & T, once the offers are made, what is the process for accepting a... 2 replies
- 2 years ago you accepted online and were given a timeframe (1 week) I think to register at the school. Yes you bring db with you with all relevant paperwork, proof of address, vaccination records etc...
Talk : : May 31, 2011
Moms with DCs in G & T, once the offers are made, what is the process for accepting an offer ? Can you accept online or do you have to go to the school to accept ? If so, do they ask you to bring DC with you ? How long do you have to accept/decline ? I am asking as we are going overseas next week for 3 weeks.(apologies in advance for another G&T posting)
2 replies [ Reply | Watch | More05.31.11, 07:32 PM Flag ]
[+] With all the hoopla nowadays with kids being diagnosed for ADD/ADHD/Autism and other... 11 replies
- I think it is a combination of genes and older women having DCs with and without medical help. Not hairspray or vaccination or pollution. How silly....
Talk : : May 29, 2011
With all the hoopla nowadays with kids being diagnosed for ADD/ADHD/Autism and other various disorders that affect them socially as well as academically, am now starting to wonder are the intense increases of these disorders with children in the past 10 years due to modern parents going overboard with trying to provide a stimulating environment for newborns/infants. We inundate babies with colors/sounds and experiences so much so that it might be causing damage - anyone care to share their thoughts...
11 replies [ Reply | Watch | More05.29.11, 06:59 PM Flag ]I think it is a combination of genes and older women having DCs with and without medical help. Not hairspray or vaccination or pollution. How silly.
[ Reply | More ]05.29.11, 07:40 PM FlagI think it's the number of professionals out there raising awareness. I went to college in the late 70s. High functioning autistic people went into engineering or science. Believe me I met mane in my work study job in the Columbia engineering library. My sister studied at that time to work with autistic kids. It was a new field. When my son was diagnosed in1998 still new. The more we know the more are caught in the net.
[ Reply | More ]05.29.11, 08:29 PM FlagA few decades ago these kids were considered peculiar or geeky. Today they have autism, asperger's, ADD, etc. It is simply heightened awareness. Not an actual increase in occurrence.
[ Reply | More ]05.29.11, 10:45 PM FlagMy DD (2.5) has just been diagnosed with PDD-NOS = she's on the spectrum. While I'm glad her developemental problems are officially labelled,I can't help thinking that she's just like her father at the same age (DH was a late talker, not very sociable, considered borderline retarded at his PK. 20 years later, he became a Mensa member). 40 years ago, mild cases like my DH (or my DD imo) were able to reach the developmental milestones at their pace. But nowadays, the competitiveness beginning at PreK is very high : if your DC is not keen on doing his puzzles at 2.5 or saying properly good morning, he is in trouble and the only way to stay in the game is to get a "on the spectrum" label. That way, your child is not considered a low-IQ brat any more(famliy/friends&school are so much more understanding). Please note that I'm speaking of "borderline" cases, not truly autistic children. To answer OP, I kind of agree with you. There's constant stimulation and I'm not sure it's a good thing for brain developement on a long term basis. I saw my nephew and niece being very bright and advance up until 12, and they completely lose their
[ Reply | More ]05.30.11, 12:10 AM Flag^^more. Please note that I'm speaking of "borderline" cases, not truly autistic children. To answer OP, I kind of agree with you. There's constant stimulation and I'm not sure it's a good thing for brain developement on a long term basis. I saw my nephew and niece being very bright and advance up until age 12, and they completely lost their brillance by age 15-20. My DH and also my father, were very late starters, and have both very high IQ, and did not hit a ceiling at 20, like many of today's overstimulated children will do.(please forgive my english, am not a native speaker)
[ Reply | More ]05.30.11, 12:20 AM Flag
I think teachers and parents alike have lost perspective about what's "normal" development in children. Any child who does not fit the mold, even slightly, is flagged. The reason given for the hyper awareness is that they want to address issues early, which I guess is commendable, but I wonder what cost to these kids and their parents. I dragged my ds, who sounds exactly like his Ivy educated father and uncle at the same age, to all kinds of therapies. Chances are he would have been just fine without it, but who knows???
[ Reply | More ]05.30.11, 03:54 AM FlagThere have been studies correlating autism with vitamin D deficiency. Rise of autism matches rise of sunscreen use/sun avoidance. http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=vitamin-d-and-autism
[ Reply | More ]05.30.11, 04:35 AM Flag
[+] pediatrician mom here, any questions? 56 replies
- just a true medical opinion-what do you think about mom's who CHOOSE not to vaccinate?...
- than child die from fulminant meningitis, I cannot advocate for parents who do not vaccinate their kids. I think it falls along the lines of neglect....
- What about parents who get all (or most) of the vaccines - just spaced out a bit (nothing crazy - caught up by 1 yr and...
Talk : : May 23, 2011
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Know any good internists on the east side of manhattan for adults?
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 06:23 PM Flagnp: I like Peggy Yih (she's off of Madison nr. 36th). She has a tiny office, but gave me a thorough evaluation and is very proactive with getting my thyroid up to speed--something my last (beloved) internist kept putting off. I now feel better and livelier than ever!
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 06:31 PM Flag
Give motrin or not to extremely cranky 2 yo who is not febrile but possibly teething?
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 06:25 PM FlagWhy is my (almost) 2 yo sleeping much later in the morning than he used to? I think he's about to hit the 50 word mark, which implies he'll really start talking soon, but am still a little concerned...
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 06:27 PM Flagwhat time is he going to bed? Also kids tend to sleep more during a growth spurt.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 06:29 PM FlagHe is down at 8 pm, and used to be up at 7:30 each day, now it is more like 9-9:30 am. How long do growth spurts last?
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 06:30 PM Flag-
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Great. We've had the same thing for about a month, and I was starting to get worried. Has he started talking yet? DS has some words, but hasn't really taken the plunge yet. I thought this might be part of the upgrading that is supposed to happen when they start going from 50 words to 500...
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 06:38 PM Flag
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dc's once broken arm gets more hyperextended looking as dc ages. should I have pediatric orthopedist look at it? doesnt seem to bother dc.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 06:27 PM Flag-
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My 2.5 year old is still in a rear facing car seat. Do you think it's ok to stay that way for a few more months? DC is light for age.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 06:43 PM FlagDoes talking early/ talking well at a young age have anything to do with IQ? Or is it just that some kids talk earlier than others. (I've heard both)
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 06:45 PM Flag-
WTH does that mean? If you don't know, just say so, don't give cryptic responses that mean nothing.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 07:01 PM Flagnp: Don't you read parenting books? OP is right. Sometimes early language skills are an indicator of intelligence, and sometimes early talkers level off and are not gifted. Some dc are more advanced in a diff area (like gross or fine motor) but catch up with language later and can still have a high IQ.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 07:12 PM Flag
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Do you think the peanut allegry thing is overblown? I've read that there are actually the same number of deaths ea yr (and it is very tiny) now as in the 1950's. The article I read seemed to implicate the drug co that makes epi-pens and the high false positives of blood test. Your thoughts?
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 07:05 PM FlagMy 11 mo's tongue hangs out of his mouth a lot. Developmentally he is totally on point if not a littl early (second kid). He had a craniotomy at 3 months for sagital craniosynostosis. Thoughts?
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 07:11 PM FlagPed mom, if you are still on, I have been pondering what you said from earlier today about how a lot of kids with strong gag reflexes have sensory issues. My ds has a strong gag reflex and has a hard time having me wash his hair because he says it hurts, and tonight he said it hurt when I was towel drying his hair. I suppose this is a sensory issue? What exactly is a sensory issue and is there a connection to autism or something? (btw - he is 3 and has no social problems with kids, well-liked in his preschool class, and does not seem to have any learning issues). thx!
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:03 PM FlagHi Ped Mom, my 4.5 year old daughter, for the past three days straight has been convinced shes going to pee, she literally sits on the toilet for hours and i can tell its frustrating her because when i ask her to get off she freaks out and says 'its coming mommy!".. but it doesn't. She is peeing normally every hour or so but in between is convinced its coming. She is not red or irritated and not infected. Any ideas? TIA very much!
[ Reply | More ]05.24.11, 12:08 AM Flag
[+] Poll: For arguments sake, let's say a "good person" is one who does not only think a... 24 replies
- in front of me in line, I don't stay silent if someone says something mean to me, etc.- but I do tend to put society ahead of my own personal wants. For example I would happily pay more taxes in order to have universal health care. I vaccinate my children because of the benefit of herd immunity, not because I think they are going to die of mumps if I don't. I bike most places. I pick up litter that is not my own on my street. But if you met me, I might not...
Talk : : May 23, 2011
Poll: For arguments sake, let's say a "good person" is one who does not only think about him/herself and their family. A good person is fully aware of others and tries to be a good citizen, not just because we live in a civilized society and we have to follow rules, but because we recognize that each living individual has something to live for as well. As examples, a good person gives up her seat on the subway to someone who needs it, lets the person with one item go ahead of her in the supermarket and humors the old lady who tells her her baby needs a hat. She's nice. Using this definition, how many of you are good people? I am. And I feel like an idiot most days and it is getting harder and harder to be one.
24 replies [ Reply | Watch | More05.23.11, 11:11 AM Flag ]Why do you feel like an idiot? I do all of the above and support several children's charities even though we don't make much $$$. I am teaching DS by example how to be a kind citizen of the world. Every day I just wish I could do more. I am thinking about becoming a foster parent.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 11:13 AM FlagIn my mind, a good person is someone who puts the needs of society ahead of her own needs and really just doesn't think about herself and her own situation all that much. So in my mind, I have some work to do to be considered a good person. But to constantly be thinking about all of the "good" things you are doing and being upset that you are not recognized or that others aren't doing the same is really just scorekeeping and it's just going to upset you. Do good if you think it's the right thing (and if you're a good person it's almost always the right thing in your heart) and don't think about what you're doing and what you should get from it. Just live.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 11:14 AM FlagI am but I really think it stems from my catholic upbringing (atheist now). DH can't believe how many things I worry and feel guilty about.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 11:16 AM Flagcatholic here - why does everyone associate it with guilt? that wasn't part of my catholic upbringing.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 11:17 AM Flagnp: I feel like it was for me. We were always taught that we should do what Jesus would do in a given situation and if we deviated from that, we should reflect on that and request forgiveness (which needs to be a sincere request). This philosophy is so ingrained into my being, even though I don't really believe there will be repurcussions to "bad" acts.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 11:21 AM Flag
I think that a truly "good person" doesn't even think about him/herself in that context. They don't say "well I'm good because I always remember to do x y and z, and I give money to charity, so therefore I'm good, and I want recognition!" They just are who they are (and I agree with poster above- don't play the score keeping game)
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 11:16 AM FlagI am. My husband says he thinks and behaves differently towards other people since meeting me. I don't volunteer at the moment, as I have two babies, but I do small things all the time for other people. Don't let others get you down. Being less of a person because of other people would be letting them win and not being true to yourself.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 11:17 AM FlagI'm pretty good--I've been letting a lot of people in line ahead of me. Seems dumb for them to stand with their OJ in the am with me and my huge cart of stuff. People generally are nice in return. I still remember the WTC story and how people gave up their own safety to carry down/comfort disabled people. I hope I can be as unselfish as that any day it's needed.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 11:17 AM FlagNot sure. I would do all the examples you listed without a second thought. But when I think about the future, I mainly care about my family. I don't make large decisions with a big consideration for the global effects. For example, if I want a car, I'll get what's best for my family, not what is best for the environment. I don't donate to charity, but I do choose to work for less $ with the homeless population. I am kind to others, but I don't act with society's interests as my primary motivation.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 11:22 AM FlagInteresting. I'm probably not always nice to everyone just for the sake of being nice- I don't let everyone cut in front of me in line, I don't stay silent if someone says something mean to me, etc.- but I do tend to put society ahead of my own personal wants. For example I would happily pay more taxes in order to have universal health care. I vaccinate my children because of the benefit of herd immunity, not because I think they are going to die of mumps if I don't. I bike most places. I pick up litter that is not my own on my street. But if you met me, I might not be effusively thrilled to meet you and chat about where we each grew up and then let you take the cab I've been waiting for just to be nice. So, I dunno.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 12:19 PM Flag
There's a difference between being a good person and having no boundaries b/c you're always trying to be "nice". I'm a therapist and see this all of the time. People who cannot stand up for themselves b/c they want to please others and be nice and not hurt anyone's feelings.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 11:27 AM Flag-
I think the vast majority of people are "good" most of the time and in most instances, but that we all have different areas of 'goodness.' For instance, you can be perfect in your dealings with strangers, treatment of "help" in service jobs, never litter or waste, etc. etc. but then cheat on your spouse. Or you could be the best spouse/parent but be inconsiderate of people you don't know. Or you could be awesome to everyone you know and come in contact to, but be cutthroat at work. So it's hard to answer that question in a way that would be meaningfully objective.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 12:25 PM FlagWhat on earth does "a good person" mean??? Everyone has their own definition of what "good" is. I'm always perplexed when people say they're a good person. Honestly, we're all flawed/sinful people, who yes, may help others from time to time. I think a person is "humble" and loving when they admit they're wrong and who think of themselves less... And by not saying I'm a "good" person and recognizing that we all need a savior.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 01:30 PM Flag
[+] pediatrician mom here. Any questions? 37 replies
- Is the vaccine for cervical cancer truly safe iyo? I was recommended to get it for my 12yo. dd, but can't she just wait a few...
- Yes the vaccine is safe. There haven't been any side effects reported from it. I think also it's better...
- DH and I dont have Hep B. how important is it for DB to get the Hep vaccine at the hospital? what is the next time they can get it? two months?...
Talk : : May 23, 2011
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Is the vaccine for cervical cancer truly safe iyo? I was recommended to get it for my 12yo. dd, but can't she just wait a few years until we know for sure? Is the rush to get it to 11-12 yo only b/c there's a thought they'd become sexually active prior to getting it around 17? I know people might flame me, but I just don't see my dd having sex in the next few years.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:28 AM FlagDo you think Autism spectrum is over-diagnosed, under-diagnosed, or just right?
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:30 AM Flag-
Is it normal for 2 yo to have no fear. Also the other day he fell 6 or 7 feet off one of those gyms in the park. He bounced twice, but got back up and kept running. Should we have taken him to the doctor. DH said he was ok, but I still had a little bit of anxiety. I wasn't sure if he could have had something internally wrong. Would he have showed any signs.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:31 AM FlagYes he should have shown some signs if there was a problem. If it has been over 24 hours and he is fine, I would not worry
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:38 AM Flagnp: 24 hours!?! My 2 yr. old just landed straight on her head on bathroom tile. What signs would there be if she hurt her spine or has frontal lobe damage?
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:47 AM Flagnp (but also MD mom)- observe her for signs of irritability, sleepiness, changes in normal behavior or normal mental status (differences in speech, balance, etc.) throughout the day. If she exhibits any changes, even if you are not sure, take her to the ped or to the ED. While not particularly likely from a short fall, you want to watch for signs of a bleed that could manifest slowly. If she had a loss of consciousness when she fell, you should take her to the ped or the ED right away (even though a brief loss of consciousness does not necessarily indicate that there will be a problem- you need to be safe and have her evaluated in this instance.)
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:57 AM FlagThank you. She didn't lose consciousness, but she is SUPER cranky. The problem is, I know she needs a nap and also probably has a headache, so it may be that. Normally, I wouldn't think anything of such a short fall, but I watched her do it and honestly, it was so bad, I thought she was going to be paralyzed at least. She didn't even have time to put her arms out and her neck landed perpendicular to her body.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 10:08 AM Flag
my 6.5 dd has an ongoing problem with her nails. Her nails are layered, the surface is not even, they break easily. What could be the underlying condition for this, and what can be done? DH and I never had any issues with our nails. TY!
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:33 AM FlagDH and I dont have Hep B. how important is it for DB to get the Hep vaccine at the hospital? what is the next time they can get it? two months?
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:33 AM FlagDS almost 9 months (big baby - big eater) can't tolerate any table food. Worry or wait a few more months? He clearly wants everything we're eating, but spits it up about 10 minutes after trying anything. No problem w/ formula or jarred fruits & veggies/ baby oatmeal/ rice cereal. Okay w/ puffs - anything else - no dice. Tried avocado, tiny bits of mild fish, chicken, mashed potatoes, hummus... Older DS was eating everything by same age - but maybe he just started young?
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:36 AM FlagI'm trying to wean my almost-1 year old off the breast. He won't take a bottle from me or DH and only takes the smallest sips from the (sippy) cup or straw cup. Will he dehydrate? He's already on the thin side.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:44 AM FlagAre there some kids with extremely sensitive gag reflexes? When dc eats chunkier food and if he tries to gulp a big bite, he ends up throwing up a lot.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:46 AM FlagYes there are def kids with more sensitive gag reflexes. Often kids with some sensory issues will have issues with food texture and can gag easily.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:48 AM FlagMy first dc was eating regular table food by 2 yo. My second dc now 2 yo is still having issues with the chewing. What can you suggest? Will he certainly learn to chew his meats as long as he is super hungry? Maybe he is just not that hungry and he won't chew?
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:51 AM Flag
How bad is it if kids don't eat vegetables? I have tried everything with my 4 year old - offering consistently and patiently, modeling, bribing..and he will not put a vegetable in his mouth. Not a great fruit eater either, I might add, although he does eat some.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:51 AM FlagI think my 11 yo dd may have ADHD, but just the inattentiveness, not the hyperactivity. Is there anything besides medication we can try? I don't I want her medicated if we can get by without it but I don't want her to struggle.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 09:55 AM FlagNot ped mom, but weighing in anyway- ADHD presents differently in boys and girls. The inattentiveness maybe a sign, but there are ither signs. Addtitionally at 11, have you begun to notice signs of puberty? That may be the cause of the inattentiveness and any moodiness.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 10:16 AM Flagor: yes, definitely. But now having researched it some I realize the signs have always been there, it's just now that the work load at school and pressures of homework that are making her fall behind. She has always been very spacey and easily distracted and has a hard time doing many things successively without having to be redirected. She is very bright and capable but she has a hard time getting started, staying focused and seeing things through.
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 10:58 AM Flag
10.5 mo has some gross motor delays. just started rolling over (back to belly) abot 2 weeks ago. pushes himself up to sitting as soon as he gets on his belly. won't roll from belly to back, doesn't crawl, and is nowhere neat being ready to pull himself up to standing. talked to our ped, of course, but what do you think?
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 10:26 AM FlagNP: Hi, My 4.5 year old daughter constantly thinks she needs to pee, this has been happening for three days straight and she is neither red nor irritated. She just constantly needs to 'go peepee' but nothing comes out. She pees normally every hour to two hours or so but shes spending 90% of her time on the toilet. Any ideas what this may be and if there is medicine for it? .. Thank you!
[ Reply | More ]05.23.11, 07:03 PM Flag
[+] I feel like such a terrible pet owner. just found a receipt for my dogs vaccines and ... 9 replies
- if you want but chances are its fine. These vaccines are pre cautionary....
- You're not alone--we're months late on our dog's rabies vaccine and I feel terrible about it. But time has a..."oh my god! Did he get his other vaccine!?" sure enough...to make you feel guilty, but go get the vaccine right away! my mom just adopted a dog who...is still watching or cares) Our Dog got his vaccine today and got a great bill of health...
Talk : : May 21, 2011
I feel like such a terrible pet owner. just found a receipt for my dogs vaccines and saw that he was supposed to return for a another vaccine (the 6-in-1) 4 weeks after I got it and forgot to take him. He was due at the end of october! Here it is 7 months later and he still hasn't gotten it. Oh and he was behind a few months when we took him to get it in the first place. I don't know how this slipped my mind. He's going tomorrow to get it... has this ever happened to any of you? FWIW (NO excuse though!) We had a brand new baby at the time of all of this, but somehow I forgot even months later. I have had dogs my whole life and this has never happened before :(
9 replies [ Reply | Watch | More05.21.11, 06:54 PM Flag ]You're not alone--we're months late on our dog's rabies vaccine and I feel terrible about it. But time has a way od
[ Reply | More ]05.21.11, 07:48 PM Flagthank you :) we are great owners (USUALLY!) and have had some pretty high maintenance dogs and dealt just fine... just somehow this slipped :( We are moving to the burbs and are getting a Boxer puppy this week (will be huge!) and it was that that struck my brain.... "oh my god! Did he get his other vaccine!?" sure enough... find the receipt and NOPE! Going tomorrow though and he is acting normal and seemingly perfectly healthy :)
[ Reply | More ]05.21.11, 07:54 PM Flagnot trying to make you feel guilty, but go get the vaccine right away! my mom just adopted a dog who had not been given his vaccines, and he got sick immediately after they brought him home. kennel cough and parvovirus. he has spent the first two weeks in his new home at the vet, on an iv. his chances of survival were 50/50 (but it looks like he will pull through), and the stay has cost thousands and thousands of dollars!
[ Reply | More ]05.22.11, 03:52 PM FlagOp: Update (to anyone who is still watching or cares) Our Dog got his vaccine today and got a great bill of health from the vet :)
[ Reply | More ]05.22.11, 08:03 PM Flag
[+] Is sealant on permanent molars standard procedure for kids these days? 17 replies
- who has been through too many rounds of "This is safe", "No, it's Not", "Ok, so try this, it's safe", "Well, actually, it's not". My dentist assured me that she uses only BPA-free sealant, so I said ok. And FWIW, I vaccinate my kids....
Talk : : May 19, 2011
Is sealant on permanent molars standard procedure for kids these days?
17 replies [ Reply | Watch | More05.19.11, 01:41 PM Flag ]Would love to know. We went through with it, but I really question whether they'll discover 20 years from now how horrible it is.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 01:44 PM FlagWhy do you think it would be horrible? Mine have not had it, but it has been recommended. Is it a difficult procedure? Are there side effects?
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 01:54 PM FlagNo, it's easy. I'm just a paranoid, luddite, conspiracy theorist who has been through too many rounds of "This is safe", "No, it's Not", "Ok, so try this, it's safe", "Well, actually, it's not". My dentist assured me that she uses only BPA-free sealant, so I said ok. And FWIW, I vaccinate my kids.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 01:56 PM FlagI found this, damned if you do, damned if you don't: "Most fissure sealants as well as composite (white) fillings contain Bisphenol A. It is an essential ingrediant in these products and allows the material to set from a fluid state into a hard state when a bright light is shone upon it. However, once set, the material is insoluble and will not cause any harmful effects if swallowed."
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 02:15 PM Flag
It is not permanent, dc had his molars done 3x already and he is 14. Also developed a cavity at the edge of the sealant. I think sealants dissolve with certain chemistry of some people's bodies.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 02:04 PM FlagIf they chew ice (which no one should) the sealants crack. That said, my kids are cavity free (12/19 yo respectively). I myself use it--I'm terrible about brushing 3x's a day and I've not had any cavities since either.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 02:27 PM FlagIf you are concerned about BPA in sealants, then request glass ionomer sealants. These types of sealants are not usu. as retentive, but some studies have shown that glass ionomer tags continue to protect the tooth despite the appearance that the sealant has been lost. Glass ionomer can release fluoride which helps protect the tooth and will uptake fluoride if exposed to toothpaste, etc.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 04:07 PM Flag
[+] After BFing two children, my breasts have almost disappeared. They are small and mush... 20 replies
- OR from above: There really is no evidence to support that breat milk is any better for health than formula. Most of us were not breast fed and during that period there was not a rocket rise in vaccination issues and autism...
Talk : : May 19, 2011
After BFing two children, my breasts have almost disappeared. They are small and mushy. I hate them and feel very self conscious in the bedroom. WWYD? Is it time for implants? Small ones so hopefully no one could tell I had the surgery. I was 34 B-C before.
20 replies [ Reply | Watch | More05.19.11, 07:03 AM Flag ]have they shrunk in size since before DCs? curious as I am deciding whether or not to breastfeed db when its time
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 07:04 AM FlagPregnancy does that to your breasts, not bfing. And please do not decide whether or not to bf based on the effects it will have on your body! To OP: I know your pain. Mine are the consistency of jelly!
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 07:16 AM FlagNot to start a war but all of this nonsense associated with IQ and disease regarding BFing or not BFing is simply that - nonsense, so I think I will decide based on how it make me feel.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 07:21 AM FlagITA! The benefit is marginal at best. If you like it, do it... if you don't, don't bf. It's really not the drama eveyone on UB makes it out to be.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 07:25 AM FlagMarginal? If you're talking about IQ points, that's one thing...do you care about anything other than how they will perform on standardized tests?!?
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 07:28 AM Flaghttp://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2009/04/the-case-against-breast-feeding/7311/ - I'm not saying bfing is harmful. I'm just saying that the studies on this are not conclusive and that this is just a very difficult thing to study. People have been fed this "breast is best" thing like it's some massive difference. But nobody can really show one.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 07:32 AM FlagOR from above: There really is no evidence to support that breat milk is any better for health than formula. Most of us were not breast fed and during that period there was not a rocket rise in vaccination issues and autism...hmm....?
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 07:35 AM Flagnp: breast milk exists for the sole purpose to feed human infants. formula is made from cow's milk and cheap oil and is seriously processed. so honestly, yes, i think it's better for infants overall to consume breast milk. unfortunately, that's not always feasible - not every mom wants to, not every mom can, and modern life throws a few extra obstacles in the way for many of us like not enough time off no family around to help out w other kids, etc. but i think we're in denial if we think that man-made stuff is better. if we've learned anything in the last 20 years, it's that processed packaged foods offer a lot of things, but they are not healthier for us.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 12:19 PM Flag
I am not one of those BFing nazis who will judge you, but...the health benefits are most definitely not nonsense, there couldn't be more evidence. Do whatever you can manage (happy mom = happy baby), but don't delude yourself either.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 07:26 AM FlagHonestly, we could all present evidence (heavy italics) to support any number of things. Sadly, science can also be warped to present whatever you want it to support. But obviously there is nothing wrong with BFing so to each their own, It makes me very uncomfortable.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 07:34 AM Flag
same here except I was a beautiful 34 C/D and now a floppy, saggy 34 B. But have been told it's from pregnancy not bf'ing. Not having surgery although am self conscious as well. Don't want hard fake lumps.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 07:22 AM FlagI know everyone says it's the pregnancy not the BF, but I think that is totally wrong! I didn't BF and my breasts are just as they were before - maybe a little bigger because I'm still five pounds overweight. My friends who did BF - their breasts have seriously deflated / became less firm. Sorry, someone tugging at your breast for six plus months after birth definitely changes them... don't let people tell you otherwise. I do wish I could have BF despite the positive of having my breasts stay the same though.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 11:48 AM Flagnp: i BF'd 2 kids for over a year each and mine look great. not 22yo great, but 40yo great. I think that it's more about pregnancy bc that's when the breast tissue undergoes change in composition and that's when the increase in size the most. some women's skin and tissue handle those changes better. BF really doesn't involve "someone tugging at your breast for 6 months" and really is more about your nipple/aureola than anything else. some women's breasts stay really large the entire time they're nursing, so that might impact things too bc they are stretched out for a much longer time. other women go back to "normal" after 3-4 months of BF even if they continue to BF.
[ Reply | More ]05.19.11, 12:25 PM Flag
[+] what do you think of this? was riding the bus this AM on the way to drop dc off at sc... 249 replies
- bc kids rode the bus? worked? cared for siblings? NO. child mortality was high bc of disease, lesser sanitation, poverty, living conditions, no vaccinations against deadly epidemics, poor nutrition, lack of medical care. of course, the kids who worked in dangerous jobs in factories are a different story. but riding the bus is not the same thing as a garment worker in a sweat...
Talk : : May 16, 2011
what do you think of this? was riding the bus this AM on the way to drop dc off at school. a mom put her first grader on the bus alone and reminded him his stop was 96th street. he rode the bus to school alone, crossed busy 96th street alone, went to school. i confess, i was worried about him because he looked so tiny, and i usually get off only one stop later anyway, so i got off and walked behind him to make sure he arrived at school ok. he was half an hour late, so everybody else was inside the building, but he got in ok. do you think it's ok to let first graders ride the bus alone on the UWS? am i paranoid?
249 replies [ Reply | Watch | More05.16.11, 09:08 AM Flag ]-
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To not feel creepy you could ask the mom. Try saying to the mother, "Hey it's no problem for me to get off at the same stop and make sure he gets to school okay if you want. I can give you my card so you have my contact info." As for whether it was right for the mom to do this, for me the concern isn't about a child that age navigating the bus but more so the mom making it obvious to those on the bus he's all on his own and announcing where he's going and that nobody will be there to meet him. SO dangerous to do that. Who knows who is on that bus to hear that.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:55 AM Flagthat's a good idea. it wouldn't have worked today because we were already sitting in the middle of the bus when the mom put the kid on (we didn't get on together). i just heard everything because she saw him onto the bus and reminded him about the stop. but maybe in the future!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:20 AM Flag
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I would also have been paranoid about the DC, not sure if I would have followed them though I see your concern and why you did it.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:11 AM Flagi thought i might as well since it was kind of on our way. i wonder what i would have done if it wasn't though? i think i might have worried about him all day! i have a kid about the same age, and it's so hard for me to picture doing this. but maybe i just baby him way too much.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:13 AM Flag
How do you know he was a first grader? I wouldn't do it, but it's possible he's a really small fourth grader (we have one at our school).
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:11 AM Flagif i put my first grader on the bus alone, i really doubt he would get off at the right stop and actually go to school. it would be an interesting experiment. that kid must be way more together than my guy.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:11 AM Flaghow did you know he was 1st grade? 2) weird that they didn't use the yellow bus, 3) when someone posts about the weird lady who followed her kid to school from the bus, we'l;l know it was you.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:12 AM FlagShe is taking a rather large gamble that there will never be a pedophile on the bus.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:12 AM FlagWhat's a pedophile going to do while the kid is on the bus? People are so paranoid.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:19 AM Flag-
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Oh my. Seriously? How old are you? Let's see...he COULD take him behind a tree and molest him right then and there, but more likely, he could take him to his home, a park, an alley, a restroom, leave the stat...off the top of my head. Just watch the news.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:27 AM Flag-
Presumably the kid has some basic street smarts if his mother is allowing him to take the bus, and knows better than to go off with some stranger. And he's not in the middle of nowhere, so presumably someone would see him if he was being forcibly taken. Bad stuff happens, but the stranger attacks are still very rare. Traffic would be the bigger issue, but presumably his mother also felt he could handle crossing the street safely. And we don't know for sure he was only a first grader.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:32 AM FlagThe most street smart kid is no match for an adult pedophile. It is their job to convince kids. "Can you help me with my dog?" "Hey, I have a bike I need to get rid of. Do you want it? If your mom says it's ok, you can have it. You just have to come get it b/c I hurt my back." Knows better than to go off with some stranger? Fourteen yr. olds do it and their parents often say, "I can't believe he did that. We talked about it all the time."
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:40 AM FlagNO First off, there are not so many 14yo's being abducted by stranger that this is a problem. Second, no parents is going to get on tv and say "gee i never discussed this w my kid". most parents DO think they talk about it w their kids jus tlike most parents think they talked about sex w their kids yet somehow kids have no clue. not going off w strangers has to be something that not only do you talk about, but you make it a hard and fast rule. and also, pedophile's choose their targets - some of it is opportunity, which is why they are often "known strangers" but a lot of it is targeting a kid where they see a weakness - the kid who lacks for attention. if you do some reading on the subject, you realize that what most people worry about is not realistic and the greatest dangers come from situations people are aware of and not acting properly.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:17 AM FlagI would have to say the same to you. Do some more reading. ANY child being abducted is a problem. You can't prevent everything, but you can certainly refrain from sending your 6 yr. old off by himself in the City. The reality is, parents talk to their kids on all sorts of levels and some even do practice drills. Like I said, it will always help, but if someone wants to take your kid, they will. The situation we are discussing here has nothing to do w/sensing weakness or grooming a needy child. It is opportunistic. I knew a woman w/4 and 6 yr. old girls. She drilled them both on what to do if someone tried to approach them on the 2 block walk home from school. "Run, scream and kick if they try to grab you.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 12:07 PM Flag^^When a man approached them, the 4 yr. screamed and ran, the 6 yr. old froze. For some reason, he went after the 4 yr. old anyway, picked her up, and she kicked and screamed until he let her go. The 6 yr. old never made a peep. You cannot prepare them enough at that age. BTW, there were other people on the street.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 12:11 PM Flagi think the fact that you happen to know of 2 kids who were almost abducted makes you see this differently. but it is so so so rare that it's like making sure your kid carries a lightening rod in case they get struck by lightening. i'm pretty sure you don't do that. my friend's teenage son was struck by lightening (or it struck nearby and he was electrocuted) on vacation and nearly died. she sees the risk of that in a way that most of us don't.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 01:06 PM FlagUh, no. Not the case. I actually just remembered those girls in writing this. It happened years ago. I read and I pay attention to the circumstances whenever I hear about a child abduction or molestation of any kind. You guys seem to be stuck on the likelihood of it happening. It USUALLY doesn't happen! But when it does, the child and their family is ruined forever. And leaving your 6 y.o. on a public bus by himself is the ideal scenario for an abductor/molester. Just not worth it IMO.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 01:27 PM Flag
FWIW. There are far more pedophiles than there are child abductors. The instances of a child being taken off the street or from their home/car/school by a stranger are so extraordinarily rare that they are newsworthy. OTOH, most pedophiles usually prey on children they have access to, but are not stealing htem off the street. The risk of this is greater and needs a different type of vigilence.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 01:10 PM Flag
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As long as a reasonably strong adult can lift my child, my child does not go without supervision. A first grader is too small and also trickable.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:54 AM FlagHonestly, that's pretty ridulous. I am a petite adult woman and by your standards, I should not be out alone. Most adults can lift me. I posted below that I don't let 4th grader out alone but your logic is flawed.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 12:22 PM FlagShould have said "easily lift and carry" - no matter how thin you are, I'm sure that's not you. I'm just starting to let my 4th grader head out on his own, around the corner to a friend's. So it sounds like we're on the same track, but with my younger child, it will be a while yet...
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 12:33 PM Flag
she shouldn't do it so that people can overhear, but but it's fine to let the kid ride the bus.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:13 AM Flaghijack: would you let a kid the same age ride the subway alone?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:14 AM Flag-
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no idea. 13? That's howold I was when I started riding it. My 10YO takes the bus and cabs if needed, but he does call and tell me the medallion number...his choice, not my request. But he is a savvy kid who only does these things when he's ready 9and we talk about it)
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:19 AM Flag
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fwiw. I rode public transportation by myself from the age of 6.5.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:16 AM Flag-
No. It's not okay to put a first grader on a bus alone. The mother was probably a nanny or maid who had to take care of someone else's child and could not protect her own.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:17 AM FlagI have a 4th grader and I would not even do this w her. Insanity!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:17 AM FlagFirst grade I wouldn't do it, but depending on the route/neighborhood I could see it. But a fourth grader? Why not? I grew up in NYC and took the bus to school by myself starting in 4th grade, with one transfer. Why do so many people insist on treating their children like infants?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:29 AM Flag
I wouldn't do it, but I think it's weird to follow the kid to school. All the kid had to do was to get off the bus and cross a street.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:21 AM Flagwell that's why i asked. to me, it was really scary that he had to cross a couple streets alone (one of them busy). but it really was only about a block, so maybe i was being weird.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:24 AM FlagI think you were overly paranoid, but I also think it was nice of you to care. I wouldn't have followed him myself, but I appreciate that because you were concerned that you followed up, didn't just shrug, think "not my kid," and let it go. I think we need to have a community of caring adults who look out for one another and our children.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:29 AM Flag
Maybe she has no option. No DH, has to get to work herself, no yellow bus route available. Its easy to say you wouldn't do it but if you were in her situation maybe you would.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:23 AM FlagDo you know for sure he is a first grader? There is one very, very small 4th grader at my dd's school. He is exactly the same size as my first grader and is 10yo but really tiny.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:24 AM Flag-
7yo are remarkably capable if the circumstances are imposed on them. i mean, 100 years ago, many of them worked, took care of siblings, etc. i don't think the average 1st or even 2nd grader COULD do this, but it's bc they haven't been raised that way NOT bc they are not capable of learning how to do it. My 7yo takes 2 buses to school - no not alone - and every single day, we go over the route: you take this bus xtown to this stop then you take one of these 3 buses uptown to this stop. he can recite it. he knows what to do if he misses his stop, he knows what to do if he gets on the limited by mistake, etc. i'm pretty confident that he COULD get himself to school alone - but we've been going over this for 2 years.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:29 AM FlagITA. My son is almost four, and I think he could get himself from our bus stop to his grandmother's place by himself if I were to let him (there are no transfers, so it's just get on, get off, walk a couple of blocks). Obviously I'm NOT going to let him at this age, but he knows exactly how to get himself there, and could, I think, cross a street safely. In another four years he'll have long mastered those skills, and will, I hope, have developed the maturity and experience to know how to handle the other aspects (interacting with adults, etc.). In the city I think those are basic safety skills that kids need to work on developing from an early age. He'll get a lot of years of practice while riding with adults, and when he's older he'll be able to confidently do it on his own.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:41 AM Flagor: i think the biggest issue when they're this young is what happens if things deviate from the norm - like the bus detours or has an accident or he can't take the usual route bc there's construction or an accident on the sidewalk etc. I find that they don't necessarily have the ability to formulate a "plan B" so that's my biggest concern.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:59 AM Flag
a 100 years ago child mortality was so high for this reason!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:08 AM Flagbc kids rode the bus? worked? cared for siblings? NO. child mortality was high bc of disease, lesser sanitation, poverty, living conditions, no vaccinations against deadly epidemics, poor nutrition, lack of medical care. of course, the kids who worked in dangerous jobs in factories are a different story. but riding the bus is not the same thing as a garment worker in a sweat shop!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:14 AM Flagthe poster above said a 100 years ago 7 yr olds worked, took care of siblings, if you cannot fathom the fatal scenarios from all that responsibility at a short age, well you need to read more and travel to developing countries where this is the norm!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:18 AM Flagmy point was that 7yo's handled a lot of responsibility, and they were capable of doing so. i'm not suggesting that we put our 7yo's into the health/hygeine/poverty/war of a 3rd world country, simply that we recognize that if they were capable of doing those things then under worse conditions, they certainly are capable of doing them TODAY on the UES or UWS of Manhattan!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:36 AM Flag
I rode the train alone from NY to CA on a regular basis (changing trains in Chicago) from the time I was 9. That seems crazy to me now as an adult, but kids can usually manage what is required.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:38 AM FlagGood for you! I know that I flew alone to Europe starting at age 12 - my grandmother met me at the airport. Back then 12+ was the age not to need to be an "unaccompanied minor". I can't believe that now it's 16!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:58 AM Flaguh, that's so not the same. I flew alone when I was 6, but flying is a one stop 6-9 hour flight. The OR was on a train for four DAYS, presumably making stops along the way where she could have accidentally gotten off or even been taken off by some other crazy passenger. Good for OR for being alive, sure, but her parents were nuts.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:06 AM FlagNP: Ita or be raped or molested by another passenger who noticed her all alone. OR is lucky.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:15 AM Flagnp: no, not lucky. the few kids to whom something like this happens are the RARE exception and they had the bad luck of being in the wrong place at the wrong time and ending up the victim of a crime. it is not LUCKY to NOT be the victim of a crime like that - it's the norm.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:32 AM Flagriiiight. That's why it is so common to ship children cross country alone.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:38 AM Flagthere is very little reason for most kids to be taking a train across country alone. and most parents don't let their kids go down the hall alone. it still doesn't mean that being the victim of that kind of crime is common or that it happens every time a parent is not there to supervise. even if the media would like us to believe that that is the case,
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:08 AM FlagWhy do you assume people think it happens EVERY time? It doesn't matter how often it happens. It will NEVER happen if I don't send my child by herself. Some risks are too high to bet on.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 12:21 PM Flag-
np: so how will your child ever learn what to do when they're by themselves? you encounter a whole different set of problems if you think you can always be with your child and always protect them.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 01:02 PM FlagI don't understand your logic. Are you suggesting that this means when my child is 17, I won't let him ride the bus alone? Baby steps and a little responsibility at a time in the appropriate situation where there is little danger. On the bus alone at 6 is not smart, in my opinion.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 01:31 PM Flag
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flying alone when you're 6, the flight attendants take care of you. of course she COULD have gotten off at the wrong place, but it's not like the train is stopping every 5 miles from here to Chicago or that Chicago is some little station you can miss. and the point is that she COULD do it - she DIDN't screw it up. and there are fewer crazy child stealers than most people think.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:16 AM FlagWhy is it so important to you to defend the OR's parents? Do you take stupid irresponsible risks with your own dc and want to assuage your guilt? Does it make you feel less like a horrible parent to know that there are even more horrible ones than you?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:25 AM Flagand why must you disparage my parenting? i don't think OR's parents were horrible. that's my opinion. my oldest is not yet 9yo and i have no reason to put him on a x-country train. i imagine i allow him a lot more independence of movement than other parents. if i believe that these were "stupid, irresponsible risks" then i wouldn't do it. i recognize that your opinion may differ. doesn't make you right.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:39 AM Flag
I wouldn't, but when my mother was a single mom, I was asked to do a lot of things like this and I turned out fine.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:43 AM FlagI would not do it. It was nice of you to make sure he was ok. Crazy poster here thinks you are a stalker?!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:46 AM Flag-
How do you know he was 1/2 hour late? You say this was a stop before you usually get off so your dc must attend a different school.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:09 AM Flagyes, the dc i was dropping off was in preschool. but the public schools start at 8:30 (i know because my older child is in public), so all the kids were inside and working when he went in. no crossing guards were out anymore (it was around 9:15).
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:17 AM FlagMy dcs public starts at 8:40 and there is no crossing guard anywhere. They are all on different schedules.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:04 AM Flagi know this school does have a crossing guard on duty when school is let in and is being dismissed, because i walk by it all the time. but of course i won't argue that some schools don't have crossing guards. and i don't think there are any elementary publics that haven't started by 9:15, although i understand they may have slightly different schedules.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:24 AM Flagwhy are you walking by all the time and yet you say you usually get off the bus at a later stop?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:28 AM Flagwow, i'm getting the third degree here! you really think this is fake, don't you? my dc's preschool is about a mile away from my house, so on pretty days i just walk her there and home. on these days, we walk past the elementary school. on rainy days, like today, we take the bus (and i get off one stop after 96th).
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:31 AM Flag-
but you apparently don't need to be to preschool until after 9:15 and yet you routinely are walking only a few blocks from it 30 minutes earlier in time to see the crossing guard? BTW, PS 75 starts at 8:20.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:41 AM Flagwow. my child can arrive at her school anytime between 8-10. depending on what time i have to be at work we sometimes get there earlier or later. and ps 75 may well start at 8:20. to me, this isn't a big difference from starting at 8:30... either way, by 9:15 school is in session. this is getting really weird.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:46 AM FlagNP: OMG, give it up. Someone calls fake on virtually every post. Probably you. It gets old for the rest of us.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:48 AM Flag-
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How do you know the child was in 1st grade? How do you know what time that school starts? This seems a bit fake.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:11 AM Flagnot fake. i explained above, i don't know for sure whether he is a first grader. he was smaller than my first grader and most of his friends, but seemed older than a kindergartener to me, so that was my best guess. and i know what time the public schools start because my older child attends one. i think all public elementaries start around the same time, don't they? 8:30?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:19 AM FlagNo, they don't all start and end at the same time. A child in my 1st graders class is as big as my 4th grader, so I don't think you can really judge by height. I would have no problem with my 4th grader taking the bus by himself to a place he knows like school.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 10:34 AM Flag
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^^and, I dont think the bus driver would have let her put a child that small on the bus alone.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:22 AM Flagreally not fake! why would i make this up? and apparently many parents don't think it is unreasonable for a kid to go to school unaccompanied, so perhaps it is not surprising that the bus driver let her put the child on alone.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:26 AM Flagok. you can say it is not fake, but it is. and, responding to your own posts does make it look like people think it is ok.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:28 AM Flagwell, you're right, i can't prove to you it's not fake and this is getting kind of silly, so i won't try anymore. i'm not sure which responses you think are mine (or what you mean when you say i'm trying to make it look like people think "it" is ok), but it seems like kind of a delusional way to read UB! new york is a big place, and it's evident that parents have all sorts of philosophies about kid independence, so i'm not sure what here is so hard to believe.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:34 AM Flag
I don't think this is fake. np here, and I once saw a mother put her K student on a public bus. My "overprotective parent" thing was to question why the bus driver was making her pay half-fare instead of free, with her student metro card. (I hadn't realized that different student cards give you different benefits, depending on how far you live from school.) It didn't occur to me to question her parenting.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:01 PM Flag
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Exactly: Child molester, assault, mugging, being hit and killed by a car. I realize this sounds melodramatic but 7 year olds are not fully capably of protecting their own physical safety in an urban area. FYI: Not a helicopter parent but this really seems like a bad idea to me. It'll be great...until something bad happens. I'd feel better if it were a group of kids together.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 04:41 PM Flag
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and 40 years later, it's still the story people tell. that kid was targeted and it was not a stranger. unless he was your friend or relative, please move on.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:50 AM Flag
Hats off to you. It takes a village. There is no way in the world that I would put a 1st grader on a bus by himself. How much time did she save not taking him? If something were to happen to him would the time she saved be worth it?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:50 AM Flag-
Absolutely NOT OK. Way too young for this, especially alone. If young dcs are taking the bus without an adult, they need to be in a large group. (And I still don't like it.) Kudos for you for taking time out of your day to make sure the dc was OK. I'm glad there are people out there like you.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 01:37 PM FlagDear OP and everyone else: Don't ever take it upon yourself to follow my child this way. Speak to me, the parent, or speak to the bus driver. You may have a kind heart, but still you're random, and shouldn't be following my child this way. No one on this board should be giving you the green light to do this. If you care about this kid, speak to the bus driver. Speak to some other authority figure/official. It takes a village? Of course it does. But you didn't make this a 'village' issue. You didn't involve anyone else. You followed this child on your own without additional help.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 04:12 PM FlagI strongly disagree. If she kept her distance, kid probably did not know. She was not a stalker, predator, so what difference did it make. The bus driver can do nothing. (And may not care anyway.) What's he going to do...walk the kid to school. I think it's GREAT that she took the initiative to make sure the kid was OK. I had this happen once where someone left a small child unattended in a parked car on a side street just near the entrance to the 6 train. Window was cracked open. Anyone could have snatched the kid. (Was probably 3-4). I stood there and waited until the negligent mom came out. Does that make me a stalker, creepy lurker? I don't think so. But I felt like it was the right thing to do.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 04:30 PM Flag"kid probably did not know." ??? I feel chills knowing someone couldfollowing my dc without them knowing. why didn't you tell someone what you were doing? did you expect the mom to come out and thank you for standing at her car, watching her kid? What if the mom was gone a long time, and you were just left standing there? I would be like, "hey, whose kid is this?". The people who don't get others involved are suspect. You are a creepy lurker. The kid must have been scared to see you standing there!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 04:59 PM FlagI didn't do it to receive some compliments and gratitude for a woman who was negligent enough to leave a dc unattended in a car for 15 minutes. I sat on a stoop and waited for her to come back. As it turns out she was up in the building and left the kid in the car. Dc was not scared. She was jumping, moving around the back seat. Seems like she was used to being left unattended and alone. Oh, and BTW, do you think I didn't ask around first before waiting? You sound paranoid and angry at the world.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:06 PM FlagYou sound like a stalker who needs justification. You clearly have contempt for the mom: Oh, this negligent mom is not doing her job, so I have to do it. So self-righteous.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:12 PM FlagNP: You sound really crazy. Better for a kid to die in a car then for this poster to possibly offend the kid's mom? It seems like maybe other parents have had to step in to protect your kids, because as another poster said, something seems to have really touched a nerve here. There are lots of different opinions represented in this huge post, but you are the only one who sounds unhinged.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:17 PM FlagI really don't care about the mom. Again, you seem defensive because perhaps you get judged as a parent. I don't care how a person parents. But if I saw the same situation, I would have done the same thing as the OP. Don't make this about the mom. It's about the kid. (Oh, and I did have contempt for the car mom. Kid was 3-4, left unattended in a car on a busy street with the window wide open. DUMB.)
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:21 PM FlagAh ha! Now we see - your contempt. If it was really about the kid - maybe you would have asked someone else what the situation was. Maybe you wanted to look like the hero? Hmmm.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:52 PM FlagThese 2 situations are different. There is NOBODY who would argue that it's OK to leave a 3-4 year old unattended in a car with a window open in a busy city street. There are plenty of people who feel that their dc can commute to school in first grade without a chaperone. The first is patently UNREASONABLE. The second may or may not be...most people on this thread think it's a bad idea but accept that the mother may have her reasons for doing so. You are clearly a troll or just a dog with a bone. 2 distinguishable situations with a similarity in that both OP and I were watching after someone else's dc.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 06:00 PM Flag
you have a big chip on your shoulder. you started the flames with your stalker talk right out of the gate.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 06:08 PM Flag
If you're so concerned about random strangers following your dc, you're not letting him commute on the bus alone in first grade.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 04:31 PM Flagthe mom was wrong, and the OP was wrong. 2 wrongs don't make a right.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 04:49 PM FlagWhat was wrong about what she did? She was concerned about the dc's wellbeing. She didn't approach and scare the kid. She trailed him to make sure he was OK. I think this is great.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:00 PM FlagAt the very least, it's presumptuous. Let's just put it this way. Now that you know there are moms (like me) that would not be okay with this type of stalking, just make sure you don't do it. Get other people involved. Alert a police officer. That's what they are there for. Why should you do it alone?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:08 PM FlagIt's not presumptuous. It's presumptuous to leave a child unattended and expect that it's going to be fine. You're more worried about YOU. I don't care about you. I care about dc's safety. Do you really think the woman should have called the cops about the dc taking the bus alone? And not all moms agree, so I'll do it my way. And you do it yours. You don't like it? Accompany your own dc to school.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:10 PM Flag
This advice is insane. What do you think the bus driver would do? And if she went to a police officer or something, the kid would probably end up at CPS.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 04:51 PM FlagIf you don't want random good-hearted strangers to follow your children to keep them safe, then take care of them yourself. You should be so lucky!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 04:52 PM FlagITTTTTTTTTTTTTA! I would be thrilled if some nice mom was watching out for my dc. This is part of being a caring member of society...looking out for one another. She didn't do anything weird or creepy like accost the dc and lecture him. She discreetly made sure he was A-OK. I applaud her efforts and I wish everyone were as kind.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:01 PM FlagSo you 2 are basically saying - because the mom was negligent, she deserves for something to happen to her child. Idiots! There is a right way to do this. the OP did it the wrong way.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:05 PM FlagNOBODY is saying that something bad deserves to happen to the child. The OP looked after the child so that nothing WOULD happen to the child. This has obviously touched a nerve with you. Hmmmm...
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:12 PM FlagYes - and let me tell you why. When SIL was 5 years old, MIL took her to buy ice-cream and to the park. MIL had to urgently go to the bathroom. She told SIL to stay on the bench and don't move until she came back. SIL remembers that it took a long, long time for MIL to come back because MIL was in the bathroom miscarrying with her 3rd child. What have we learned? Don't assume anything. Get other people involved. Ask, whose child is this? Get another grown-up to talk to the child with you. Anyone not willing to do this is SUSPECT!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:16 PM Flagnp: i'm so sorry this happened to your family. but i'm not sure how this story applies here. if anything, i would assume your MIL would really appreciate a kind stranger keeping an eye on your SIL while she was indisposed. i doubt she would have wanted harm to befall her daughter just because she was not there. and what other people would you have wanted involved in your SIL's case? i understand why you are emotional, but i don't see the logic in this post.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:20 PM FlagReally? I'm a child molester/abductor because I watched someone else's kid to make sure the kid was safe? Logic/reason is not your strong suit. I don't care WHY the dc was in the car. I didn't YELL at the mom. I watched the dc until the mom came back. What does your anecdote have to do with anything? SIL was traumatized from sitting a long time on a park bench? And???????
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:24 PM Flag-
I guess I don't see why this story means that caring adults shouldn't keep an eye on kids. Wouldn't that have helped your SIL? Wouldn't that have made this story have a better ending? I am really confused.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:27 PM Flag
NP: I don't understand what you are saying. You wanted the OP to call 911 and make the child wait with her while they waited for the police to arrive? You really think traumatizing this kid and possibly having the mother fined or arrested is the right approach?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:14 PM Flag
Not a nervous or helicopter parent at all but assuming the dc was in first grade, this is way too young to be commuting alone. 99.9% of the time it will be fine. Until it isn't. I would be less worried about actual abduction than I would about dc being molested, assaulted or mugged.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 04:33 PM FlagI think it is okay really. It will always depend on the kid.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 04:39 PM FlagIt will depend less on the kid than the kid's luck. If the kid's lucky he won't get hit by a car or encounter someone looking to hurt him. And in most instances, luck will win out. As the old saying goes, "It's better to be lucky than good." Personally, I wouldn't allow it.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 04:43 PM Flag
At 6 I took 2 buses (when it was cold) or walked to school. This was in the early 80's and in Philly. I have an almost 6 year old and I know she is capable on doing the same but for safety reasons I wouldn't do it. The problem here is the mother announced to the entire bus that the child was alone. A molester golden opportunity. For the posters who think this child couldn't be molested/abducted you are sadly naive.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:23 PM FlagThe voice of reason! It's not that you want your kids to live in a bubble, but we should all look to minimize risk in a sane and healthy manner. OP saw a situation that did not sit right with her and was nice enough to make sure no harm came to the dc. This is commendable, not condemnation worthy.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:33 PM Flagyes, but all some people are trying to say is, OP went about this the wrong way. OP basically creeps me out - and then wants to come here and be congratulated by everyone or wants the mom to be slammed by everyone? this post whole post is definitely wrong or fake.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:45 PM Flagnp: where did she say any of those things? she was asking what people thought, and she got a lot of answers. i don't think she slammed the mom at all.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:49 PM FlagShe didn't ask to be congratulated. She asked for opinions. I don't think the post is fake. I think it raises some great issues. How old should a dc be to commute on his own? What should our responsibilities as parents be to dc who aren't our own? How should we approach things to limit danger (or not) to dc who aren't ours? Reasonable people can differ on all of these questions. There is one freak poster who's making this about her and some story that happened to her SIL as a child. I can't decide if she's a troll or just an outlier on the thread.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 05:56 PM FlagOR: I don't think the OP was wrong. I personally would have done the same. Actually I have done something similar. I saw a man who didn't quite fit leading a child (who didn't want to go) away from the playground. I followed them and found a way to even speak with them. OP was looking out for this kid and if something were to happen and she intervened we'd be hailing her as a hero.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 06:02 PM Flag
OP obviously thinks there was something wrong with what OP did - or else she would not have posted this. Looking for validation? Why can't you be confident in yourself you did the right thing? I hope this story is fake.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 06:19 PM FlagOMG, she asked for opinions because she wasn't sure about what she did. Did you read the post? Stop trolling! Are you that NZ poster everybody complains about?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 06:27 PM FlagYes, I think so. And it's so annoying because there are actually some really good conversations on this thread about whether it's OK for young kids to commute and what the realistic risks are. I think about this a lot. I have a 7 year old. At what age WOULD I let her ride the bus unattended? Or go in a taxi alone? Or take a subway? Or walk to school? I'm not there yet, but I'm not sure what the answer is. Is it about her maturity or is it about "luck" as one poster above pointed out?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 06:31 PM Flagnp: i actually think this is one of the rare posts that turn out to be very interesting on UB as well. great conversations, lots of different opinions, and people miraculously kept it civil until a troll appeared at the very end. i think it's something we all struggle with--how much independence, how soon. fun to read!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 06:57 PM Flag
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[+] pediatrician mom here. Any questions? 106 replies
- you were going to give your child the MMR vaccine what things would you do to help this be...to get it combined with the chix pox vaccine in it as that has a higher incidence...minimal. Dairy intake has nothing to do with vaccine reactions and the literature surrounding seizures and varivax...
- I space out the vaccines and try not to give more than 2...I'm crazy? I do get them fully vaccinated and prioritize based on the prevalence and severity...
Talk : : May 16, 2011
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my son had a dilated renal pelvis. there is no reflux. what would you recommend as a follow up course? he is 4 months.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:38 AM FlagDS just turned 2. He babbles a lot and talks - but doesn't say too much that the general population would be able to understand. I can't understand 1/2 of what he says. Normal? (I don't know many 2YOs). He understands both English & Spanish - but when he talks - my dad jokes that he's speaking Chinese.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:42 AM FlagBilingual kids tend to speak later than kids raised in single language homes. At 2, you should understand about half of what he says, so that's on par with where he should be. If you are worried though, there is no harm in having him evaluated. Best case scenario - he's fine and you are reassured.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:45 AM Flag
DS is 2 yo. He is biracial but with brown skin. DH and I have noticed white spots appearing on his face and now legs, his feet are also getting very dark. Our Ped said since birth his complexion will even out it's not it seems to be getting worse. Is this something to be concerned about? Should I take him to see a dermatologist?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:45 AM FlagHow many words should a baby(not bi-lingual) have by the age of 18 months.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:45 AM FlagAnd tips on how to talk to my son's RN about his language skills? He is 20mo and growing up bilingual. Currently, he understands everything in both languages but doesn't have many words other than Mama, Papa, down, yum, gatto, and animal sounds and letters. I think he's fine but RN says he should be further along. I'm getting frustrated because I know that there's nothing wrong with him and that he'll catch up to his peers soon.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:46 AM FlagIs this your NP/pediatrician? You should feel perfectly comfortable telling her how you feel. You could also have him evaluated, show her the evaluation and be done with it. Kids who are bilingual tend to develop their expressive language skills later.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:50 AM FlagYes, she's an RN and his ped. But i don't want to get him evaluated because there's nothing wrong with him: he communicates, just not with words yet, and I'm confident that he'll start speaking when he works it all out. I don't think RN has experience with bilingual babies and I want her to acknowledge that they gain speech differently but that there's nothing wrong. But I don't want to offend RN either. Any tips?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:54 AM Flag
8MO DS is clearly starving -- wants 2 full jars of baby food for lunch and dinner - drinks 32oz+ per day of formula. We've tried to start more solids - but he seems to throw up everything (about 1/2 hour after eating). Stick to baby food for a few more months? I forget when my first started eating table food -but I think it was around 8 months.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:47 AM Flag-
99% for height & 50% for weight. Has been since birth. EBF for 6 months - started baby food around 4/5 months. He's just a big kid. His older brother hasn't cracked the 5% for weight ever - both eat constantly. I'm worried about my grocery bills already. Oldest is 2.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:56 AM Flag
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Why is it that pediatricians always say that infants can't have allergies?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:50 AM FlagThat is actually not true. Infants can have milk protein allergies - which can manifest as feeding intolerance, bloody stool and breathing problems. Because infants should not be eating anything besides breast milk or formula, other allergies shouldn't be apparent. They can also have contact dermatitis from soaps or chemicals on diapers
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:53 AM Flag
My son is also always hungry--just turned 4 months and stares us down when we eat, too. Is it really best to wait to add food until 6 months? He is EBF right now.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 07:58 AM Flag-
I am really not in support of cosleeping because of all the possible risks associated including SIDS. Unfortunately I have seen some awful outcomes from cosleeping so I would have to say I am much more in favor of CIO.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:06 AM Flag-
NP: I would never have thought I would even ever ever try CIO - DH kind of pushed me to try it and we have the best sleepers. I think each cried for 10 minutes max the first night or two and never again. (those 10 minutes felt like hours and broke my heart- but I gave it 10, and they settled themselves down before the timer went off). There are many levels -- you can't just lump CIO into one hard-core leave the kid screaming for hours bucket...
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:19 AM FlagThis is ridiculous, someone asked OP a question that was clearly an opinion ("What do you really think of...") and now OP is being criticized for having given an opinion. She didn't say that she discourages patients from co-sleeping!
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 01:54 PM Flag
NP: OP, I'm surprised that you would answer this question as a pediatrician and the way you did. I have never co-slept with my DC a single night but even I know your answer is irresponsible because it isn't supported by statistics and you let us assume that it is by taking on the role of an authority.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:41 AM Flag
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If you were going to give your child the MMR vaccine what things would you do to help this be the best situation it could be? For example I have heard limiting dairy for a while before and after is better and also not to get it combined with the chix pox vaccine in it as that has a higher incidence of seizures.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:05 AM Flagwhat do you think of educational dvds for toddlers. i know the rec is to wait until after 2, but my 16mo seems to be learning a lot from dvds. we show him one 30 min dvd per day.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:05 AM FlagDD is only 2 months old but I feel worried that she is fat (90th %ile h/w). She may be overfed - she's EBF and cries a lot so I nurse her a lot - but I feel like if I use the pacifier that would be putting her on a diet and just indicate that I have weight issues or something. Is she at risk for anything by being chunky?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:11 AM FlagNP (not a doctor): this is my DD also. She's 7 weeks, 90th for weight. And she doesn't even like pacifier so that's not an option. I don't care about the weight (well I do, but am trying not to worry at this age), but I was more concerned that she seemed to have reflux. Pedi thought she was just getting overfull. He said trying to space out the feedings a bit might help. So if I think she's acting hungry I try other ways of soothing her for a few minutes - rocking or bouncing. Sometimes it works and she does seem less fussy since doing this (i.e. less tummy pain).
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:22 AM FlagOR: I could have written this post! Yeah I was feeding DD till she projectile vomited because I was reading her sleep cry as a hunger cry. Now when she cries 30 min after a feeding, instead of putting her to the boob, I put her in the crib and she passes out. Hm maybe she will drop out of the 90th %ile in a few weeks...
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:43 AM Flag
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Not Pediatrician but my DD was about to be officially diagnosed with this, but DH and I agreed we wanted to wait first so we pulled her out of ST. In the end she began speaking at 3 thanks to dora at 4 she became a little less shy and at 5 she is good at making friends. We just encouraged her and kept her in a secure environment until she was ready.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:20 AM Flag
My 7 yo dd is too hairy. My pediatrician isn't worried about hormonal probs. but says we shouldn't do anything about it until she is 18. Dd is already self-conscious. Can we do anything?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:17 AM FlagDD is on singulair for her cough which it seems to help. Is this safe, can it intefere w her growth?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:22 AM FlagApparently, I startled 10 year old DS this morning - he's extremely dramatic, starts clutching his chest and saying he felt something electrical happening in his chest when I did that. Now of course, I wrote it off to his general level of intensity, but you do occasionally hear of teenage basketball players dropping dead on the courts. Is there anything we should check into? He's spending a lot of this summer in intensive sports away from home. Should I be worried?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:34 AM FlagI space out the vaccines and try not to give more than 2 at a visit when they're young. Do you think I'm crazy? I do get them fully vaccinated and prioritize based on the prevalence and severity of what we're vaccinating against. I know this isn't necessary - the question is more - would you think I was crazy if my kids were your patients?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:35 AM Flagfunny how nobody got on her for working instead of being a SAHM and accusing her of outsourcing her child rearing. I guess sometimes it IS okay for a mom to work....
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 08:54 AM FlagWhat do you think about the fact that I asked my dd's ped for a recommendation for an audiologist and he responded that he didn't have one and offered no further advice other than to google it.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 09:19 AM Flagmy son has bilateral hydronephrosis. diagnosed prenatally as well as postnatally. at his 6mo US he still had it. had a VCUG at birth which was negative. he is scheduled for a f/u over the summer. if it never goes away, what does it mean for him? is he still at risk for frequent UTIs even if VCUG is negative?
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 11:38 AM FlagNot a question -- just a comment: I've noticed again and again that pediatricians are SO MUCH nicer than any other MDs. Kinder, more patient, seem genuinely to care about their patients, and even polite to the parents. They are almost as nice as vets. Wish all the nasty horrible other Drs would take a cue from them.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 12:33 PM FlagOur family eats lacto-ove vegetarian. Am I hurting my kids? Both healthy, normal growth, normal iron stores.
[ Reply | More ]05.16.11, 01:44 PM Flag
[+] Anyone have a tetanus booster vaccine recently? Stabbed my finger on a staple yesterd... 5 replies
Talk : : May 05, 2011
Anyone have a tetanus booster vaccine recently? Stabbed my finger on a staple yesterday and had to get one yesterday. My arm is sore (which I know is normal), but my neck is also stiff. Anyone have stiff muscles after this? Otherwise, just feeling achy and a bit of the chills, but no high fever. My mind is getting the better of me and now I'm scared I somehow have meningitis or an infection after this vaccine. TIA!
5 replies [ Reply | Watch | More05.05.11, 12:19 PM Flag ]
[+] Wealthy hedge fund mom. Any questions? 146 replies
- None of these organizations helps the poorest or most vulnerable. Don't you think you have a responsibility to them? Think about Oxfam, Care, Catholic Relief Services, or Gates's Vaccine Fund, all of which focus on alleviating the suffering and improving the prospects of the world's most poor and unfortunately children....
Talk : : May 04, 2011
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No. I can't imagine why you'd think this would be interesting.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 01:48 PM Flag-
So you're identifying yourself based on your DH's job? This ain't 1910, darling. You can have you own identity. You can even vote now.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 01:50 PM FlagI had a bunch of questions...until I realized that you are just the wife of a hedge funder. Far more curious about the women who hold these top positions.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 01:54 PM FlagIt isn't interesting that you're rich. Talk about something more interesting - your projects, your ideas for the future, politics, anything.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 01:59 PM FlagRight now I'm a SAHM to two active kids. My "projects" include volunteering at their schools, planning family vacations, taking care of the home. Not too interesting. Once dcs are older I'll go back to work p/t.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:02 PM FlagOR: What you just wrote is 500 times more interesting than informing us that you're the wife of a hedge fund dude.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:03 PM Flagnp - Were you always this boring? And did you always think people would care about you just because of your husband making money? You do know you won't be interesting until you come back when he leaves you for some woman he meets at work, right?
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:04 PM Flag-
Hedge fund guys and bankers and men like that always screw around. Always. Many leave wives and kids and get new wives and kids. But you'll always have all the money you need, so that's something.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:17 PM FlagAlways - yeah, right. I think you've been reading too much Nanny Diaries.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:19 PM FlagNope. I'm not a kid and I have a lot of friends. I've seen this again and again over the years. There's a price some women pay for the money, and this is usually the price. Trust me. Sit your husband down, tell him he can be honest, and ask him if he's ever cheated.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:22 PM FlagYou know what? I think you're jealous. There's no good reason why you'd be trying so hard to convince me my DH is unfaithful.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:30 PM FlagWhat would I be jealous of? I'm happily married, I have kids, friends, etc. Money isn't something that makes me jealous, not that I'm poor. I just think that you're overly invested in your husband's success and you could wind up getting bitten in the butt by the very thing you hold so dear. It happens all the time.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:37 PM Flag
Testosterone factor. Same genome: master of the universe, dick masters. Screw masters. But it doesn't have to be a money thing. Great writers, great artists, etc. Look at Picasso and Norman Mailer. Same deal. Power, money, fame: aphrodisiacs to other women, empowering for the powerful men. Sorry, but it's rare when there is an exception.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 03:44 PM Flag
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We give to dcs' schools and our colleges, to March of Dimes (one dc was a preemie, I give at least $20K a year), Met Opera, national cancer institute/NIH.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:07 PM Flag-
Huh? You consider giving to help preemies and cancer research dull?? Hope you never have to deal with either, but these are extremely worthy causes.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:16 PM FlagYep, these organizations are all BIG NAME orgs that raise tons of money. Don't have a problem with the causes but it doesn't strike me as very interesting organizations working on those causes. Other than NIH, I shouldn't have lumped them in with the others.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:25 PM FlagI believe it's more effective giving to big organizations with transparency and lean overhead costs. A lot of tiny charities are just excuses for tax reasons. I want to know that my money is going directly to the causes I care about.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:29 PM FlagVery few large institutions have lean overhead costs; its actually often the opposite. I don't have a problem with people giving to large institutions, but when I see someone ONLY giving to large/name institutions, it indicates to me that they aren't interested in researching their causes very deeply.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:33 PM Flag
None of these organizations helps the poorest or most vulnerable. Don't you think you have a responsibility to them? Think about Oxfam, Care, Catholic Relief Services, or Gates's Vaccine Fund, all of which focus on alleviating the suffering and improving the prospects of the world's most poor and unfortunately children.
[ Reply | More ]05.05.11, 04:26 AM Flag
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Who care about talking to the wife of a hedge fund guy? I'd rather de-lint a sweater.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:02 PM Flagis his hedge fund an honest one? good returns? who makes most money investors or those that run fund
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:04 PM FlagThe investors by far. DH gets a %age of the returns, so his income varies year to year. Yes, honest of course.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:10 PM Flaghow on earth would you know about the honesty part? not saying there's anything dishonest going on, but, really, how can you possibly answer that question? the real answer is that you hope and expect there isn't, but you really do not and cannot know for certain.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:15 PM FlagDH would tell me if there was anything dishonest. Unless he himself doesn't know, I can vouch for him.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:18 PM FlagWhat's straightshooting to him may be dishonest to regulators. The fact of the matter is you cannot know this. So your answer can be, as far as I know there's not, but in no way can you answer this question to an objective certainty, particularly since this is not your area of expertise.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:20 PM FlagOK, so every single answer is "as far as I know", "to the best of my knowledge" and "upon information and belief". Should I have put that as a disclaimer right in the original post?
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:25 PM Flagactually, yes, you should have. it would have been a lot more honest/accurate. as written, the post is quite misleading. you are not a wealthy hedge fund mom. you are a wealthy hedge fund DW and SAHM, which is a totally different ball of wax, and I make no judgment whatsoever on any of your choices.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:28 PM Flag
Thanks for posting. Sorry about the fool(s), determined to be critical. Wish they had something better to do. Pretty sad when the best thing they can do with their time is tell someone putting themselves out there that she is boring.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:19 PM FlagThank you, I appreciate it. The reason I posted is because I wanted to give people an opportunity to see that I'm just as human and normal as the rest. In the other thread people wrote about "wealthy hedge fund" families as if we're somehow from a different planet.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:22 PM FlagI think a lot of the flaming has to do with the fact that you are a SAHM presenting herself as a "wealthy hedge fund mom", which is a tad misleading given that you do not now, and never have and probably never will, actually work at a hedge fund. a lot of flames could have been avoided with a better-worded post.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:25 PM Flagnp: well, you are from another planet, whether you realize it anymore or not. I don't have any issues with your money or anything else and think a lot of these posters are just plain nasty, but with that level of wealth you by definition cannot be normal. Nice, etc., sure, but not normal.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:27 PM FlagWhy do you think I'm from another planet? Unless you really believe people are defined by their bank accounts, what really makes me so much different from people who make less?
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:35 PM FlagBecause your wealth insulates you from many of the realities of everyday stress.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:37 PM FlagI have enough everyday stress. Raising 2 dcs, taking care of home and properties, these are all normal stresses. Sure, I don't scrub my own toilets, but this is hardly a different reality.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:40 PM FlagI meant the stress of budgeting, of wondering if you'll be able to afford a vacation at all this year, much less how often you'll visit your 3 properties. Come on, you know what I meant. I'm starting to think this is a fake post.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:42 PM FlagI grew up middle class. We could afford domestic inexpensive vacations. Didn't live paycheck to paycheck, but were mindful of what things cost. So I do understand what you mean. Yet, trust me, there's still stress and planning when it comes to managing your wealth.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:44 PM Flag
Next time have your DH post. Much more interesting for most of us to learn about what he does.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 02:44 PM Flag-
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What would/will you do if/when he tells you he is leaving you?
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 03:48 PM FlagSorry for all the jealousy here. Question- Do you still have the same friends you had before your wealth? Does the money make it difficult for them or you? Jealousy? How do you get along with siblings and the rest of your family?
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 04:56 PM FlagMost of my friends are the same, and the rest are mostly through dcs' friends. No, the money doesn't make it difficult. Family is different. One of my siblings is middle class, the other is really struggling. I have the hardest time with the middle class sibling. I help the struggling one and they appreciate it sincerely.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 06:21 PM Flag
I love that you met in college before wealth, my DH and I did also. Do you feel the money has changed you much? Do you spend a lot on yourself (clothes, spa etc).
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 05:18 PM FlagThe money did change us, dh more than me, no question. I don't really spend a lot on myself, but I don't save pennies either. I just get what I like, but I don't really like shopping to begin with. I spend a lot on vacations, indulgences like flying 1st class, etc.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 06:26 PM Flag
I am super jealous. We have to pinch pennies, count every dollar we spend and put off things like dental visits. I know money doesn't make you happy but not having money is tough. I think about it all the time and it feels like a heavy weight on my shoulders at all times. Both DH and I went into low paying fields and I wish every day we could go back and do it over. I see wealthy moms and I envy them. Not in a mean I hate you way but in a boy I wish I was in your position way. I wish your family the best. Enjoy.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 06:14 PM FlagI love the way you call yourself wealthy based on income but what is your net worth, which is the real measure of wealth?
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 06:35 PM FlagWhere do you live? I think if I had a shitload of money I'd go for Tribeca. maybe the West Village. Hard to decide.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 06:39 PM Flag-
why are you playing these people? You're so transparent....let me guess, American Idol isn't on tonight.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 06:53 PM FlagI just want to say I am so jealous of you I want to cry. Are you skinny too? I am 15 pounds overweight, live in a tiny apartment, and we make barely $250. We are both not successful. All I want is to have a little more money, so we can get our of debt, get a bigger place, and give to charity. Please tell us what your day is like.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 07:11 PM FlagIF you make $250 perhaps pity...but assuming you meant $250K--therefore NO ONE will pity you.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 07:18 PM FlagI wasn't looking for pity, and if you think $250k is a lot of money, on the UES, you are the stupidest person on earth.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 07:30 PM Flag$250K is barely enough to get by with just two, but if you are thinking of having dc there is no way. As for hedge fund mom, enjoy your life there is no reason for you to feel you have to justify anything any more than if your dh was an accountant or teacher or anything else that was not considered to the symbol of greed that the hedge funder has become. But obviously it is true that these guys cheat like crazy. I have seen it with my own eyes all over the place because they have no shame and flaunt it.
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 07:37 PM Flag
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Thank you for posting here. Please realize that a lot of the posters here are jealous of you. I am actually finding this instructive. I am also married to a finance guy, but he is an investment banker earning around $6m a year. He and I grew up very working class and we have 3 kids, and our main disagreement is on who should be helping us run our household and help with the kids. What household employees do you employ? We have a weekday nanny, weekend nanny, a 3 day/wk tutor and a household assistant who does the scheduling and paperwork. I feel we need a cook or a housekeeper and my husband feels this is too much help? what employees do you hire for what jobs?
[ Reply | More ]05.04.11, 08:12 PM Flag- [ Removed by moderator ] [ More ]05.04.11, 08:49 PM
[+] Does anyone else go crazy when they read things like this? I almost feel like we are... 10 replies
- OP: YES. We have to use our own brains and not blindly rely on what the FDA or anyone else says is OK. This is why people are still going crazy over the vaccine / autism link. And you are right - I tend to go crazy worrying, so I'm trying to go easier on myself....
Talk : : May 03, 2011
Does anyone else go crazy when they read things like this? I almost feel like we are constantly being poisoned, and the government does nothing to ensure our safety.
10 replies [ Reply | Watch | More05.03.11, 05:53 PM Flag ]http://www.scientificamerican.com/blog/post.cfm?id=bpa-linked-to-wheezing-in-babies-2011-05-03
[ Reply | More ]05.03.11, 05:53 PM FlagI agree with you to some extent. I think we as people assume if something is FDA approved it is TOTALLY safe, however, I do not think this is the case. In many instances after a product is on the market for a duration of time they discover that there are potential health risks assoicated with it. I think it is up to us as individuals to try to live as healthy as we can and control the things we can. That being said you can't take things to total extremes, just to the best you can. It will make you crazy otherwise.
[ Reply | More ]05.03.11, 05:59 PM FlagOP: YES. We have to use our own brains and not blindly rely on what the FDA or anyone else says is OK. This is why people are still going crazy over the vaccine / autism link. And you are right - I tend to go crazy worrying, so I'm trying to go easier on myself.
[ Reply | More ]05.03.11, 06:12 PM Flag
My 19 yo ds has had asthma his whole life--we've tried eveything to make his world allergen free--this really would tick me off if this is a contributing factor!
[ Reply | More ]05.03.11, 06:23 PM FlagIt drives me batty. Our country is controlled by corporations who care only about profit and our government kisses their ass. BPA is just an example. What about all the hormones etc with food production? Or the sunscreen thing?
[ Reply | More ]05.03.11, 06:26 PM Flag
[+] DH here. Do you think that it's alright to take a four month year old child to church... 15 replies
- Actually MMR is a live vaccine so baby doesn't get first dose until age 1. That being said, baby also isn't going to catch measles, mumps, or rubella from sitting in a pew that a homeless person sat in 6 hours prior, so I wouldn't worry....
Talk : : May 01, 2011
DH here. Do you think that it's alright to take a four month year old child to church? I wanted to take my child to church, but my wife thinks that the church may be too dirty. The church runs a homeless shelter next door and allows the homeless to stay in the pews during the day during the week. She is concerned that the pews aren't sanitary for children who are so young. (She still doesn't have her MMR shots...) Thoughts?
15 replies [ Reply | Watch | MoreI think it is fine (I would not bring a newborn to any big crowd, per my ped) but after 3 mos I think it is okay. I also think it's okay to hold the baby -- so she won't really being touching anything! (This is not about homeless vs. any other group, just my understanding is, say, never bring a 2 week old out during cold/flu season). I think you are okay here.
[ Reply | More ]05.01.11, 02:04 PM FlagI think it's fine. I'd keep the baby in the baby carrier anyway. But, if your wife isn't comfortable with it, have her stay home with DB while you go to church. The early months are hard, no need to add drama. Congrats on the addition!
[ Reply | More ]05.01.11, 02:04 PM FlagRegardless of the "right" answer with respect to germs. I would do what your exhausted and concerned wife wants. Sounds like a 1st baby. She won't give a hoot about this issue with any subsequent children but the first time around Mom's like to be cautious. Make Mom happy.
[ Reply | More ]05.01.11, 02:09 PM Flagwhen my dd was 4 months old, I would have rather died then taken her to church. Now, I may sing a dif tune, but when #2 arrives my instincts and fears may kick into full gear again. You should respect that your wife probably cannot control her 'germaphobe' ways w/ a new born and just wait it out a bit. GL
[ Reply | More ]05.01.11, 02:48 PM FlagI started taking our son, and now daughter, to church after their first round of shots. There are just as many germs in your house as there are in church - it just depends on the concentration of them! While the pews aren't going to be sanitary, if you're going to lay your 4 mo. old child on one (hopefully you don't), wipe it down. I always have wipes with me to wipe down things first (especially when we go grocery shopping), but then to clean up any mess (from snacks, or if my child is sick with just the sniffles). You can always keep the child in a sling (like already said) or bring him or her in their car seat. Good luck!
[ Reply | More ]05.06.11, 08:35 AM FlagThank you all for your helpful advice. To be clear, I'm not looking to UB to "undermine" my wife, I just wanted to know what the consensus was. We did take her for Easter (to a smaller church back home), but wondered about the cleanliness of a church in the city.
[ Reply | More ]05.08.11, 10:08 AM Flag
[+] will pediatricians separate the mmr vaccine? i heard that you can't get the mumps pa... 7 replies
- it's been proven that there is no connection between mmr and autism. why would you wat to separate the vaccine?...
Talk : : April 28, 2011
[+] Db had first set of vaccinations today. Is it normal for him to be super fussy today?... 18 replies
- Isnt mumps part of the MMR, and a live vaccine? Not fit for a 2 month old?...
- got. But, I don't know which part of the MMR is a live vaccine, or if all 3 parts are, so if you are a mom who is against combo vaccines and your baby is getting measles, mumps, and rubella all as separate shots, I'...No way anyone's giving mumps vaccine to a 2MO....
Talk : : April 20, 2011
Db had first set of vaccinations today. Is it normal for him to be super fussy today? What's up with this? Thx so much!
18 replies [ Reply | Watch | More04.20.11, 02:26 PM Flag ]-
It's normal. What did he get? I can tell that the MMR shot physically hurts for a little while. It feels like a big sore lump, whereas the other shots are absorbed a little quicker and do not leave any lumps or swelling.
[ Reply | More ]04.20.11, 02:30 PM Flagtetanus, novovirus drops, mumps, polio, a few others. Total of 2 shots, 1 per thigh and the drops. Two months old.
[ Reply | More ]04.20.11, 02:33 PM FlagIsnt mumps part of the MMR, and a live vaccine? Not fit for a 2 month old?
[ Reply | More ]04.20.11, 02:34 PM Flag-
Nurse mom here... MMR is not given earlier than 12 months. I would call your pediatrician's office and ask exactly what he got. But, I don't know which part of the MMR is a live vaccine, or if all 3 parts are, so if you are a mom who is against combo vaccines and your baby is getting measles, mumps, and rubella all as separate shots, I'm not sure. Regardless, the fussiness is normal... but MMR is definitely not supposed to be given to a 2 month old baby, that I am sure of.
[ Reply | More ]04.20.11, 02:41 PM Flag
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Look it up at www.nvic.org
[ Reply | More ]04.20.11, 02:41 PM Flag-
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[+] I can't believe a parent would propose punishing a helpless kid for his parents' mist... 84 replies
- Extensive= long term care for serious health issues. I believe all basic care (dr's visits, vaccinations, emergent care, etc) should be provided....
Talk : : April 19, 2011
I can't believe a parent would propose punishing a helpless kid for his parents' mistakes (like their not having good healthcare). Are we a civilized country or not? Civilized countries take care of THEIR children.
84 replies [ Reply | Watch | More04.19.11, 11:22 AM Flag ]Actually, I'd go so far as to say that civilized countries take care of ALL children. But I guess I'm a pinko commie bastard.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:39 AM Flag-
I mean that I think that if a child (or anyone, actually, but we're talking about children here) is sick, regardless of his or her nationality or immigration status, it is the job of doctors to treat him/her. And doctors shouldn't have to work for free, so the cost to make a child healthy should be spread out and covered by the people of a nation.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:53 AM Flag-
np It is the case--hospitals can't refuse to treat. But I think illegal immigration needs to be nipped in the bud.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:16 PM Flagregardless of what you think about immigration, people are still human beings and no one should have to die because they can't afford medical care or because their parents are in this country illegally.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:33 PM FlagIllegal immigrants can't be allowed to remain here to receive medical care! Getting it on an emergency basis is one thing, but remaining here is quite another. The fact it's so easy to stay in the country illegally is the very reason so many people come here illegally. It's a massive problem and needs to be dealt with.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:36 PM Flag
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I agree with you in theory. Problem is, helping people too much encourages more & more people to abuse the system.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 12:03 PM FlagIf they have no other decent options, what do you expect? You can't offer sub-par education, no nutritional education, no future other than low-paid service industry jobs and expect people to be really excited about being self-sufficient. Welfare should be something that helps people until they can help themselves. But that won't happen in a vacuum.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 12:16 PM Flag-
Of course I'm serious! I'd like to be idealistic as well, but I've seen too much. Just the other day I needed a replacement social security card. I met a woman at the SS office who told me she had to have a 5th kid to get more benefits (they had slowed down). I thought people made stories like hers up! There are so many people abusing the system.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:11 PM Flageven if we accept the claim that this si a common problem, how will denying those children benefits help? the kids dint choose her as a mom, and they probably need more help than most.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:12 PM Flag
Isn't it true that all kids will receive some reasonable level of care if they are sick? When did access to experimental and $$$$$$$$ treatments become a basic human right? It's not.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:13 PM Flagno, its not true. they should, but especially if they have chronic conditions that require management and/or medication, no they will not necessarily receive quality care. we're not talking experimental chemo here, we're talking an inhaler.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:18 PM FlagIt's not a basic human right to receive *extensive* care on someone else's dime. Just like it's not a basic human right to receive top private education on someone else's dime. You're entitled to the basics if you are poor. Yes, it's a shame.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:30 PM Flagwhat do you consider "extensive"? anything above emergent care?
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:36 PM FlagExtensive= long term care for serious health issues. I believe all basic care (dr's visits, vaccinations, emergent care, etc) should be provided.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:45 PM Flag
OMG. You just used the word "entitled" in the same sentence as the word "poor." I think your membership in the right wing is about to be revoked.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:36 PM Flag
It is a difficult problem. The kids are innocent; subsidizing their health care encourages people to have more children than they can afford to take care of, which imposes significant negative externalities on the community as a whole.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:41 PM Flaghave birthrates among the poor dropped post' welfare "reform"?
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:45 PM FlagNo idea. No idea how you would control for all the potentially confounding variables, anyway. But "people respond to incentives" seems to me sufficiently well established as a principle that it is a good rule of thumb for considering the impact of various policies.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 01:57 PM Flagno idea, but there are clearly demonstrated correlations between birthrate and poverty (and education, but there you go). try here (http://ideas.repec.org/a/pid/journl/v44y2005i4p597-614.html) or here (http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/politics/birth-rates-must-be-curbed-to-win-war-on-global-poverty-434387.html)
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 02:52 PM Flag
maybe people don't want to be "taken care of" by you. maybe they want the right to raise their own children instead of being condescended to.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 02:01 PM FlagOP: I don't think you understand what we're talking about. It's in response to a poster in another thread who suggested that children shouldn't receive healthcare unless their parents were paying for it - that if your parents didn't plan well for your healthcare, you should be left out in the cold.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 02:08 PM Flagno one wants the right to watch their children suffer for lack of adequate medical care.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 02:11 PM FlagBut people do want the right to reproduce irresponsibly and have society pick up the tab.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 02:25 PM Flagyou know, some people become poor after they have kids. some people don't have good access to contraception or abortions. often children and moms become poor because of divorce. its easy to define poor kids as the children of welfare queens, but its not reality.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 02:30 PM FlagI didn't say anything about welfare queens. I said having children you can't afford to support is irresponsible. This is a point we have to debate now?
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 02:34 PM Flagmy point is, sometimes you stop being able to afford them later. most,if not all, policies you design to discourage people having kids they can't afford are going to also hit people who get down on their luck later on.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 02:38 PM FlagThat calls for nuanced policy, of course. What is the alternative, we as a society agree to write a blank check to people to have children they can't afford? Does it ever stop? Must we pay for Octomom's children? How is that fair to people who choose not to have children they cannot afford? It is a tough issue, but my sympathies lie with the responsible people.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 02:58 PM Flagnp Willing to bet that the VAST majority of poor families were poor before they even started having kids. Check out a Babycenter board sometime--they all think kids cost nothing because of WIC and all the gov $ they can get.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 04:56 PM Flagso the best possible way to help out people is certainly to leave them injured from preventable childhood diseases, dying young when there are simple treatments, available, etc. because if that's what we do, then the motivated babies will bootstrap themselves up.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 05:09 PM Flag-
unless you're talking about starting forced sterilizations, or a rigid caste system that allows no one to fall into poverty after having children, you're still suggesting, ultimately, physically harming children whose parents are poor. do you not see that?
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 02:45 PM Flag
A civilized country takes care of THEIR citizens. period. Everyone should be entitled to healthcare at a reasonable cost, just as in Europe and Japan.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 05:54 PM Flag
[+] What did you make of Rep. Paul Ryan's budget proposal which calls for gutting Medicar... 44 replies
- slob for a mother who can't get her act together enough to provide "basic needs" like health insurance, is it that three year old's fault? Would it be good for society as a whole to let that kid miss out in basic pediatric care (eg vaccinations) or does it make more sense for the state to step in on kid's behalf? This is one expenditure I have zero problem with....
Talk : : April 19, 2011
What did you make of Rep. Paul Ryan's budget proposal which calls for gutting Medicare and Medicaid? "It irks me to no end that people keep calling him "courageous". Really? Courage would have been going after defense and rich people. His budget goes after children, the poor, the jobless. This is picking on the weakest kid on the playground and getting called courageous for it. And he doesn't come close to solving the deficit. If you are going to put out a fantasy document that appeals to the dickishness in you base, shouldn't it at least accomplish the goal?" - Bill Maher
44 replies [ Reply | Watch | More04.19.11, 10:52 AM Flag ]-
If you over over 12, you are too old to name call. Maybe all the reps can pull their weight and balance the budget. FYI spreading hysteria that this targets children's healthcare is plain irresponsible. That said, if you have children shouldn't you plan ahead and assume they'll need to see a dr, get clothing and food? Yes, people fall on hard times. But most of us who pay taxes aren't so interested in paying for the bills associated with the children YOU decided to have. You pay their costs. I'm happy paying for public schools, roads, and other things that people who don't pay taxes can't afford. But if you can't manage your own family's basic needs, it's time to recommit to earning a living. That is the unwritten rule of parenthood. Provide for your family first.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 10:56 AM FlagMany jobs don't offer health insurance, and premiums on the private market are often astronomically high and the policies cover little. Thus, if a parent got fired (and many do during a big, huge recession), through no fault of their own, they could need help with child medical care. I've got no problem with that.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:00 AM FlagIf it were true, I'd have a problem with it too. Kids under 18 can get care at any emergency ward or clinic they go to. If your 5 year old appendix burst and you had no insurance and you showed up at the hospital they'd treat that child. The taxpayers would cover the cost. Get your head out of the sand!
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:01 AM FlagNP: Right. So your plan is to let people rely on "emergency rooms and clinics" to keep children healthy. That costs SO much more than just paying for their healthcare before they get sick. You get your head out of the sand!
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:04 AM FlagWhere did I say that was my plan? My point was to the above poster who claimed kids would have no coverage. Kids will always have coverage was my point. (I agree, it's expensive to do it that way - rely on the emergency rooms.) But it's false to have people walking around saying 'oh the kids wont' be covered'. B.S. they are covered.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:08 AM Flag
I work in healthcare, and I can tell you that ERs are only equipped to treat/stabilize children for emergencies. It costs A LOT of money, overtaxes our system to the point of breaking (where we're at now), and offers incredibly poor care, with no continuity, to the children. Clogging our ERs is not an answer for the multitude of children who need healthcare. It results in higher cost, poorer care. Any other suggestions?
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:05 AM Flag
Go even further: if a three year old happens to have a lazy slob for a mother who can't get her act together enough to provide "basic needs" like health insurance, is it that three year old's fault? Would it be good for society as a whole to let that kid miss out in basic pediatric care (eg vaccinations) or does it make more sense for the state to step in on kid's behalf? This is one expenditure I have zero problem with.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:07 AM Flag
Good idea. Now how do we start creating jobs for those people?
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:01 AM FlagAre you really happy paying for public schools, roads, and other things that people who don't pay taxes can't afford? I don't think you are. Because anyone who would make a child suffer because her parents are poor or because they "planned poorly" doesn't really think we're all in this together.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:02 AM FlagI am happy to pay for all of those things and be part of the national community; I wish ALL adults who could hold employment and also help by paying taxes felt this way. I am already paying for the medical care of these children (and their food and clothing too). So what I would like to see is their parents also make a contribution (first to their family and then if possible to the larger community who has been supporting them and their children). The bulk of what we donate (not talking about tax related stuff here) is to childrens charities fyi, and job training for women. These are the two areas we view as 'making a difference'. But we are very much 'teach a person to fish' vs. 'hand them cash'. Look, nobody feels good if they aren't supporting their own family and unfortunately, like it or not, this is something parents DO hand down to their kids! If you parents are not going to work every day, or helping their neighbors, or sharing what they have when they have abundance -- their kids children won't either.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:34 AM Flag
Truth is we the taxpayers end up footing the bill one way or another. I'd rather invest in education, healthcare, welfare on the front end than prison on the other. Our economy can no longer support the population. It's what happens in capitalism. Be happy your family is financially secure and pay your damn taxes.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:16 AM Flag
Bill Maher is a cretin. Does he not know that there are millions of millionaires receiving Social Security and Medicare benefits? Ryan addresses that by phasing down the government's contribution to private health insurance for wealthier future retirees. His plan actually is a tax hike on the rich, pure and simple, if anyone had bothered to read it instead of demagoguing it.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 10:58 AM FlagHmm. Doubt it. My grandparents worked their whole lives and saved and invested well and were comfortable financially. They declined ss and medicare. They can't be the only ones! Tell me the names of the millionaires accepting this aid? I call b.s.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:00 AM FlagNP: Are you kidding? All of the wealthy family members I know collect SS and medicare. Pretty sure it's the norm! Although that's classy of your grandparents :)
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:02 AM FlagIt's not the norm! Start asking older people (who you'd be comfortable asking) and you'll discover that many decline it! It was a source of pride among my grandparents that they didn't take what they didn't need. (Maybe that was a generational thing, but I can't imagine accepting SS and medicaid and i've paid in more than my fair share!)
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:04 AM Flag
that is absurd. There cannot be more than 0.001% who literally don't cash these checks. Meanwhile look at the state of Florida. The poorest Americans are the elderly, but so are the wealthiest.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:04 AM FlagIt's not an issue of "not cashing the checks" it's a decision to not "sign up" simply because you hit a certain age. I agree that there are many poor elderly, and guess what they were poor when they were young too. The point is, your best earning years are 25 to 55. So people need to take that seriously and bank money while they can, pay into SS so if they need it it's there. If they don't need it, perhaps they can decline and see it as defering to those with less or the future generation.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:06 AM Flagagain, I would say that a system of voluntary refusal of benefits is not going to be a significant reducer of future liabilities. at all.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:10 AM FlagI didn't say it was -- I was posting in response to the person who claimed "millions of millionaires" were receiving benefits (which they'd paid for fyi). I don't believe this is true. Do you think when Warren Buffet retires he's collecting a SS check and asking the gov't to foot his healthcare bills? Doubt it.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:13 AM FlagWarren Buffett is a multi-billionaire, not a millionaire. By millionaire I mean a retiree with household assets over a million dollars, and yes there are millions of retirees in that position, and yes, almost all of them -except your grandparents- take their promised SS benefits, as well they should! But since the programs, SS but especially Medicare, are grotesquely insolvent, it makes sense to reduce the benefits of the wealthier future retirees more than the poorer ones when designing a reform proposal, and Paul Ryan's plan does this. Obama - no reform proposal, just rub your lucky rabbit's foot and hope for the best.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:18 AM Flag
Repubs want to turn SS and Medicare into welfare programs so that they can then attack and cut them.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:13 AM FlagYet that's kind of what it is! Say you accept SS and medicare and you don't need it. You'll hand it down to your kids (who probably also don't need it) and the gov't will tax that inheritance and get most of the money back anyway. Why not just give it to someone who actually needs it? (That said, Obama wouldn't know how to balance a budget if his life depended on it!)
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:40 AM Flag
Maher needs to do his homework and actually look at gov't expenditure before he makes silly comments. The simple truth is more than 60% of the federal budget is allocated to SS/ healthcare/ benefits. It is nearly impossible to reduce the deficit without fundamentally reforming the largest areas of spend.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:03 AM FlagBingo. (These posters are very frustrating because they believe everything an entertainer says. He's not an economist, he's not an advisor to the president, he's an entertainer!!! With an agenda to boot.)
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:10 AM FlagRight, but economists by and large agree that the Ryan budget doesn't do a lot as far as the deficit goes because he gives most of the savings back in the form of tax cuts (mostly to the highest earners). Granted, the Obama plan doesn't do much on the deficit either.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:28 AM FlagSo how about we do an approximation of Ryan's plan on the spending side, and Obama's on the tax side, and actually do something about the deficits?
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:33 AM FlagI'd be ok with that overall. There are a few things in both plans that are just digs at the other side and don't save real money. They should go away. Some things need to be a little less harsh. Other than that I think that is the direction we should go. But, I think both sides are more interested in firing up their base than they are in real answers.
[ Reply | More ]04.19.11, 11:40 AM Flag
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