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Email a FriendAs he walks out of practice, he sees Mom. He didn’t realize, until this moment how much he missed her. How much he loves her.
My Freshman
Visiting for "Freshman Parents Weekend"
Posted by Lisa Hendey in Family on Friday, October 15, 2010 12:00 PM
You travel literally all day, waking at 3:15 am without a care because you know your day will end with a hug from him. When you finally arrive, you have to wait two long hours to see him because he’s in an orchestra rehearsal, and it feels like the time will never pass.
At the first sight of him, your heart skips a beat as he strides across the hall, confident and yet obviously anxious to see you. With the first hug, you’re sizing him up - has he grown? Is he getting enough to eat? Do his eyes look tired? You decide the answer to all three is “yes”, and then you hug him again, just because you’re his mom and you can get away with it.
He walks you across campus and you note how many people say hello to him by name. He talks about his favorite class and you want to ask if you can attend it with him, but know you shouldn’t (not cool to bring mom to class) so you choose to keep your mouth shut. You take him out for a nice meal and see how relieved he is to eat something besides cafeteria food. You hug him again, deciding you’re going to do that as many times as you can this weekend, to collect hugs for the months ahead when you’ll be missing him so much, as if you could pull out a stored-up one and wear it like a sweater.
You go back to his dorm room and find it, well, looking like two busy teenage boys live there. You ask him when the last time he changed the sheets was and when you hear the answer you immediately ask him if you can change the sheets and he says, “Yes, please”.
You talk and talk and talk - taking in his stories, wishing you could slow time down a bit, marveling at all he’s learning and accomplishing and experiencing.
You hug him one last time and then it’s time to say good night and go back to the hotel, when really you’d like to curl up and sleep on that scary rummage-sale couch in his dorm. But this is his place, not yours, and it’s your job as the grown up to respect that…
So you head back, happy knowing that you still have a few more days before you have to say goodbye again—for real. As you drift off to sleep, your prayers are full of thanksgiving for this time in this place.
It’s Freshman Parents Weekend.
Comments
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Posted by Mary Beth on Friday, Oct 15, 2010 1:34 PM (EDT):
Sniff, sniff! My oldest (of 4) is 11. My youngest is 3 weeks old. Reading your post makes me miss them already! I loved your touching account of your reunion with your ‘baby’, and Fr. Rust’s Epilogue. This is the stuff of life & love. Thank you for sharing.
Posted by mommy on Friday, Oct 15, 2010 3:25 PM (EDT):
Lisa, how wonderful that you made the time to visit. I had a good friend in college. Our school was very far from her home ( but not as far CAlifornia to Boston). Her parents never came to visit. Coincidently, during her time in college she developed a rather serious depression. So it is wonderful how you are doing so much to stay connected to your son during this transition.
Posted by Deacon Tom on Friday, Oct 15, 2010 5:39 PM (EDT):
Borrowed & slightly edited from Ecclesiastes 26:16
“Like the sun rising over the mountains of the Lord, such is the beauty of a good mom in a family that loves each other.
Savor every moment. Put it into your treasure bank. Use it when problems arise.
Blessings.
Posted by Christine on Friday, Oct 15, 2010 8:23 PM (EDT):
Wonderful, touching post, Lisa. I am going to share it with my husband. My fourth daughter is a freshman, the first of ours to stay in state. We’ve already visited her Labor day weekend to help solve the dilemma of most of her luggage being misrouted (thankfully, not stolen) for 12 days. Then my husband just “happened” to take one of our younger children camping in the area of Olivia’s college a few weeks later. Parents Weekend is coming up this month and we are taking the three youngest along. We promised the two boys a soccer game (#1 team in the nation) and a football game. We are all squeezing into one motel room. This will cost quite a bit on one income, but we are pumped, and it is driveable in 2.25 hours. We also hope to visit our college junior at Thanksgiving time 500 miles away from home if we can get the cash together. She seems likes she really needs us right now, but we’ve never had a Thanksgiving without our extended family. Tough decision. Please keep posting about older kid issues. We parents in our 50’s who wax eloquent about the simpler times raising little ones need all the support and information we can on the thorny young adult issues. God bless you.
Posted by lynda on Saturday, Oct 16, 2010 4:16 AM (EDT):
I’ve two at university and three at home. My tears surfaced as I read it. Getting the right balance is important. My first was very independent and wanted to make her life but now starting her 3rd year she likes to spend more time with the family. The fresher, as we call them in Britain, has been very home sick and she’s just 50min drive away. I have to trust God and their guardian angels to keep them safe. For I know He holds them in the palm of His hands.
Posted by Donna-Marie Cooper O'Boyle on Saturday, Oct 16, 2010 11:59 AM (EDT):
Ah, beautiful recounting of your visit, Lisa. I’m glad you got all the hugs in you could get and then some. 
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