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No One to Blame But Myself
Why did I let my friend talk me into this?
by Karen Langley


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Carrie's out sick again?" I asked my friend Kristin as we shoved our jackets into our lockers. "It's been a whole week!"

"I know," Kristin replied. "We should go visit her during lunch."

"During lunch?" I was surprised. At our school, students weren't allowed to leave school property without a parent's permission.

"Yeah. Why not?" Kristin said. "She lives right across the soccer field."

"I know, but it's against the rules," I protested.

Kristin gave me the look. "Are you kidding? It's not that big of a deal, Karen."

"Right," I said, trying not to sound like a wimp. "Yeah, let's do it."

I spent my morning classes thinking about our upcoming trek across the schoolyard. Two voices argued in my brain. First: We should just wait till after school. Then: But it would be great to surprise Carrie at lunch. And back and forth. By third period, the second voice had won out.

At lunchtime, Kristin and I met in the cafeteria. We gulped our sandwiches, bought a package of Oreos and a carton of orange juice, then headed outside. We wandered away from the building toward the basketball courts, where we paused to check out the cute boys—and to glance over our shoulders to make sure we weren't being watched.

"Walk fast, but not too fast," said Kristin. "And don't turn around." Easy enough. I was focused on keeping my heart rate under control.

When we reached the fence on the opposite side of the soccer field, Kristin handed me the bag of cookies and OJ. "Here, hold this while I climb over." She climbed easily over the chain-link fence and plopped down on the other side.

I tossed the bag over the fence to her and scrambled over. Thud! My feet hit the ground, and immediately I felt my heart rate start to slow down. Hey, this isn't so bad.

We jogged across a few backyards to Carrie's house and rang the doorbell. No answer. We rang it again and knocked. No luck. Kristin cupped her hands and peered through the little glass window in the door.

"She's probably sleeping," I said. "And both of her parents are at work." We scribbled a note to Carrie on a napkin and left it with the Oreos and juice on the welcome mat.

My nervousness had disappeared by the time we reached the fence again. What was I so worried about? I thought. That was fun. We climbed back over the fence just as the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch. Perfect timing! If we hustled, we could catch up with the last few students heading inside. Kristin and I jogged across the soccer field and slowed to a walk once we reached the basketball courts.

That's when we spotted Mr. West. Our assistant principal had a face that looked like it had been chiseled out of stone. There he stood—arms folded across his chest, stony eyes staring straight ahead—at us. I froze. Kristin froze. We watched the last few students disappear through the door into the building, leaving the schoolyard empty. Empty except for Kristin and me. And Mr. West.

My mind started to race. I felt my mouth go dry. Sweat bubbled up on my hairline.




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