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movie Glossary
Barber's Itch Rule
A major star in a film about army recruits going through basic training will never have their head shaved completely. Their hair will merely be short (e.g., Bill Murray and Harold Ramis in "Stripes," Richard Gere in "An Officer and a Gentleman.") Likewise, a star entering prison will only have a tasteful trim {Robert Redford in "Brubaker." JON NICCUM, Kansas City, MO
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Up in the Air (R)
Ryan Bingham is the Organization Man for the 2000s. He never comes to the office. Technically, he doesn't have an office, he has an address where his employer has an office. His life is devoted to visiting other people's offices, and firing them. “Up in the Air” takes the trust people once had in their jobs and pulls out the rug. It is a film for this time.

Brothers (R)
"Brothers” is the new film by Jim Sheridan, a director who has a sure hand with stories about families (“In America” “In the Name of the Father,” “The Boxer”). This one is about a family twisted from its natural form when the father leaves for service in Afghanistan just after his brother comes home from prison. The good brother goes into harm's way while the bad brother is shielded by his own misbehavior.

Everybody's Fine (PG-13)
A man in his 60s after the death of his wife is a leaky ship without a bailer. Frank Goode has everything above-deck shipshape, but he's sinking. The garden is his pride and joy. Everything inside is mopped, scrubbed, polished, dusted, arranged and alphabetized. He buys big steaks and a new electric grill to cook them on. He selects a wine with the advice of a clueless stockboy. He reclines in his lawn chair on his manicured lawn and awaits the arrival of his four children.

Fantastic Mr. Fox (PG)
Some artists have a way of riveting your vision with the certitude of what they do. This has nothing to do with subject or style. It's inexplicable. Andy Warhol and Grandma Moses. The spareness of Bergman or the Fellini circus. Wes Anderson is like that. There's nothing consistent about his recent work but its ability to make me go zooinng! What else do "The Darjeeling Limited" and "The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou" have in common?

The Road (R)
Note: I first saw "The Road" in September at the Toronto Film Festival, as one of eight films I saw in three days. I wrote a draft of a review at the time and sent it. That review accidentally found its way into sight in October, long before the film was scheduled to open. I yanked it offline as quickly as I could.

I saw the movie a second time at a press screening on Oct. 27 in Chicago. I see festival films again whenever I have the chance. I find the second viewing makes the good ones better, and the bad ones worse. Such is the case with "The Road."

Old Dogs (PG)
"Old Dogs" is stupefying dimwitted. What were John Travolta and Robin Williams thinking of? Apparently their agents weren't perceptive enough to smell the screenplay in its advanced state of decomposition, but wasn't there a loyal young intern in the office to catch them at the elevator and whisper, "You've paid too many dues to get involved with such crap at this stage in your careers."

The Twilight Saga: New Moon (PG-13)
The characters in this movie should be arrested for loitering with intent to moan. Never have teenagers been in greater need of a jump-start. Granted some of them are more than 100 years old, but still: their charisma is by Madame Tussaud.

Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call, New Orleans (R)
Werner Herzog's "Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call, New Orleans" creates a dire portrait of a rapist, murderer, drug addict, corrupt cop and degenerate paranoid who's very apprehensive about iguanas. It places him in a devastated New Orleans not long after Hurricane Katrina. It makes no attempt to show that city of legends in a flattering light. And it gradually reveals itself as a sly comedy about a snaky but courageous man.

The Messenger (R)
Maybe the only way to do it is by the book. You walk up to the house of a total stranger, ring the bell and inform them that their child has been killed in combat. When they open the door and see two uniformed men, they already know the news. Some collapse. Some won't let you finish before they beat their fists on your chest, crying at you to shut up, god-damn it, that can't be true. Some seem to fall into a form of denial, polite, inviting you in, as if this is a social situation.

Planet 51 (PG) (11/18) »

2012 (PG-13) (11/12) »

Skin (PG-13) (11/11) »

Pirate Radio (R) (11/11) »

The House of the Devil (R) (11/11) »

Gentlemen Broncos (PG-13) (11/11) »

The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day (R) (11/11) »

The Exiles (No MPAA rating) (11/11) »

Disney's A Christmas Carol (PG) (11/5) »

Precious (R) (11/4) »

The Men Who Stare at Goats (R) (11/4) »

The Box (PG-13) (11/5) »

(Untitled) (R) (11/4) »

The Fourth Kind (PG-13) (11/4) »

The Horse Boy (No MPAA rating) (11/4) »

This Is It (PG) (10/27) »

Bronson (10/28) »

The Yes Men Fix the World (No MPAA rating) (10/28) »

Harmony and Me (10/28) »

21 and a Wakeup (R) (10/28) »

An Education (PG-13) (10/21) »

Antichrist (No MPAA rating) (10/21) »

Amelia (PG) (10/21) »

Astro Boy (PG) (10/21) »

Motherhood (PG-13) (10/21) »

Walt and El Grupo (PG) (10/21) »

Cirque du Freak: The Vampire's Assistant (PG-13) (10/21) »

Where the Wild Things Are (PG) (10/14) »

Black Dynamite (R) (10/13) »

The Damned United (R) (10/13) »

We Live in Public (No MPAA rating) (10/14) »

Law Abiding Citizen (R) (10/13) »

New York, I Love You (R) (10/14) »

Rashomon (No MPAA rating) »

A Serious Man (R) (10/7) »

Couples Retreat (R) (10/7) »

Paranormal Activity (R) (10/7) »

Trucker (R) (10/7) »

Coco Before Chanel (PG-13) (10/7) »

Good Hair (PG-13) (10/7) »


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New Agers and Creationists
should not be President
New Age beliefs are the Creationism of the Progressives. I move in circles where most people would find it absurd to believe that humans didn't evolve from prehistoric ancestors, yet many of these same people quite happily believe in astrology, psychics, reincarnation, the Tarot deck, the i Ching, and sooth-saying. Palmistry and phrenology have pretty much blown over.

Time keeps on slip, slip, slippin' away
I sense it's about time to share some of my thoughts about television and movie critics, myself, and the past, present and future of my corner of the critics-on-TV adventure. My friends A .O. Scott and Michael Phillips are well into their first season as the new co-hosts of "At the Movies." Richard Roeper just announced he will be streaming reviews on his web site, and they will re-run a week later on the Starz cable channel.

How pleasant to meet Mr. Lear!
Call for nominations! Chose the winner! Details.
thumbs
recent Two Thumbs Up® reviews
Linked here are reviews in recent months for which I wrote either 4 star or 3.5 star reviews. What does Two Thumbs Up mean in this context? It signifies that I believe these films are worth going out of your way to see, or that you might rent them, add them to your Netflix, Blockbuster or TiVo queues, or if they are telecast record them.

the Your Movie Sucks™ files
Gathered here in one convenient place are my recent reviews that awarded films Zero Stars, One-half Star, One Star, and One-and-a-half Stars. These are, generally speaking to be avoided. Sometimes I hear from readers who confess they are in the mood to watch a really bad movie on some form of video. If you are sincere, be sure to know what you're getting: A really bad movie.
in theaters
9
on dvd
A Christmas Tale  (12/1)
Funny People  (11/24)
Frailty  (11/24)
Four Christmases  (11/24)
Angels and Demons  (11/24)
Thirst  (11/17)
Star Trek  (11/17)
The Limits of Control  (11/17)
Humpday  (11/17)
The Exiles  (11/17)
Coraline  (12/8)
The Cove  (12/8)
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