Let Us Drive in Peace

Peter Mehlman, 09.17.2009

Television writer and producer of SEINFELD, host of Narrow World of Sports.

First, drinking. Then talking on the phone. Then text messaging. You'd think the government would cut back on its probes into highway accident-causing activities, but ... no dice.

Matt Damon Eats Ben Affleck To Gain Weight For The Informant!

The Hollywood Ham, 09.17.2009

thehollywoodham.com

"What, would you rather me eat Casey Affleck?" Damon asked. "Let's get serious."

What Kind of a Total Facebook Knob Are You?

eSarcasm, 09.15.2009

eSarcasm.com -- Geek humor gone wild.

I know. You get no end of pleasure by sending "fun" quizzes to all your Facebook peeps. Then you wonder why people have quietly unfriended you.

Max Baucus Releases Health Care Bill With Bi-Industry Support

Lee Stranahan, 09.16.2009

Filmmaker, Writer, Photographer

Baucus was hiding in his office behind a large pile of money and not available for an interview but issued the following written statement...

Ellen DeGeneres Named New White House Press Secretary

David Kronke, 09.16.2009

"I'm not going to be happy until I have half the jobs in America," DeGeneres declared. "If that means taking your job, then so be it."

2009 Fall TV Schedule--In Color!

Spencer Green, 09.17.2009

Visit Mr. Green's website parallelfilmguide.com

CNN - We Broadcast Anyone Anywhere With Anything To Say About Michael Jackson While Any Vestiges of Credibility or Relevance Go Down the Toilet Along With the Rest of the News Media

Desperate U.N. World Food Program Enters Starving into U.S. Eating Contests

Lee Camp, 09.17.2009

Comedian, LeeCamp.net

Glenn Bleck's Diploma from University I Don't Remember

John Wellington Ennis, 09.16.2009

Filmmaker, Activist, Some Dude

Here is some official-looking accreditation that shows that Glenn Beck's figures for the attendance of his 9/12 D.C. march are more official.

Democrats Still Not Aware They Actually Won The Election

Scott Blakeman, 09.16.2009

Political comedian

Their latest act of spinelessness came when the Senate voted 83-7 to deny ACORN any federal funds. Apparently, Democrats have never met a right wing smear campaign they didn't like.

Let's Ban Smoking Outside Too!

Carolita Johnson, 09.15.2009

cartoonista, etc.

I'm all for any kind of smoking ban, anywhere, anytime. Even my smoking friends complain about walking in the wake of someone's smoke outside. That's telling, isn't it?

Top Nine Reasons to See Bill Maher Perform at the 2009 NYCF

New York Comedy Festival, 09.16.2009

5. The Daily Show and The Colbert Report don't tape on Sunday. What are you supposed to debate with your co-workers on Monday?

Patrick Swayze Will Respond to Each Fan's Condolences Through Whoopi Goldberg's Twitter

Ben Berkon, 09.15.2009

Comedy Writer/Blogger, SomethingYouShouldRead.com

"Thanks for all the RIPs," typed the dead Swayze to the first of the 15 million fans who posted on Twitter, as his ghost-self sat on Goldberg's lap.