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 They're all going to laugh at you. By Dave "Fargo" Kosak | January 14, 2004 
Ah, sidekicks! They perform some of the most vital roles in any game: They help you solve puzzles. They lighten the mood. They cure your wounds. They're invaluable in combat. They make jokes about having sex with dead people. Without sidekicks, well, games would be darker, harder, and wouldn't have so many necrophilia jokes. And nobody wants that.
In honor of these unsung non-heroes, I've assembled this list of The Ten Greatest Sidekicks of all Time ... with a little help from the gang on the GameSpy Forums. It's a stunning array of characters, featuring no less than three dogs, two talking skulls, and a Lagomorph. Read on! 10. The Pikmin From Pikmin, 2001 
Falling in at the bottom of our prestigious list are some little guys who stretch the definition of "sidekick." These sycophantic little buggers from the Nintendo game Pikmin are more like minions, edible laborers if you will, soulessly obeying every command from their spaceman master. Don't let the cutesy music and dialogue fool you. What are the Pikmin doing? Look beneath the surface, people: 
They're KILLING, BOMBING, and DEVOURING anything that stands in your way. They even drag corpses around the screen before assimilating the dead into their hive as nourishment, like a rainbow of goosestepping fascists. To move them, you actually physically hurl them over your head. Sweet.
Only their diminutive size spares us from the living nightmare that they may someday throw down their shackles and turn upon us all, bombing our homes, dragging us out of our beds, and sucking us up into their petaled flying furnaces. But, as it stands, all they can do is shake flowers. We breathe easy ... for the time being.
Next: He came. He saw. He sat on your shoulder, naked. » |
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Who? The fat little man in the green suit, who desperately wanted to believe he was a Fairy. When it comes to sidekicks, Tingle (playable if you have a Game Boy Advance hooked up to your GameCube) had the useful ability to throw bombs. This was tempered by his not-so-useful habit of 