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[+] Feeling very poor. Bought a house in 2007. Mortgage $900K. At the time we were making... 9 replies
- ITA. DH net about $13K a month and have been able to save significantly. We live in a modest apartment and DD goes to public. We don't live a life of luxury, but we're comfortable. When we first moved to NYC our HHI was $50K. We still were able to save and make it work. We just made different choices. In any case, I wish you and your family well....
Talk : : November 18, 2008
Feeling very poor. Bought a house in 2007. Mortgage $900K. At the time we were making about $400k a year. Now DH has no income (works for himself, so it varies) and I have a job for about 12 more months (PE fund). Between house and nanny, we have little left. May have to sell the house. It's crazy that it's damn near impossible to live in NYC (not even manhattan!) on less than $13K net a month. Just complaining out loud a bit.
9 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.18.08, 10:43 PM [ Flagged ]Millions of people live in NYC on less than 13K/monthly. You've made choices that limit your options. Good luck balancing it out in a new way.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 03:12 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]ITA. DH net about $13K a month and have been able to save significantly. We live in a modest apartment and DD goes to public. We don't live a life of luxury, but we're comfortable. When we first moved to NYC our HHI was $50K. We still were able to save and make it work. We just made different choices. In any case, I wish you and your family well.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 05:50 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
good luck in your new challenges.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 03:16 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]What a sheltered life you live.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 05:03 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]perhaps you would like to elaborate? when you make a comment like that it begs the question.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 06:04 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
I'm sorry, but it is no where near 'impossible' to live in NYC on less than 13k a month.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 05:19 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I think what happened is that your mortgage is killing you. You (as many people did - laid-off self included) assumed you would maintain your HHI. $13K is totally doable. We spend less than that per month with childcare, huge 2BR at nice address in Manhattan, vacations, random mommy and me weekend classes, etc.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 07:35 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]can I ask how you do that? where do you live in manhattan? do you rent or own? do you have a nanny? thanks.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 06:02 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] You know, I was listening to a commentator and he was saying that people who grew up ... 3 replies
- I like what you're saying; it's frightening but the humbling aspect appeals to me. We are middle class working parents (HHI $135,000) with kids in public school who have some debt (less than $5,000) because I was foolish and spend more on kids after school activities, x-mas presents, b-day gifts than I could reasonably afford. Full-time child-care is killing me but there's less than 1 year until my youngest is in ft kindergarden. Now at least when I am tempted...
Talk : : November 18, 2008
You know, I was listening to a commentator and he was saying that people who grew up during the depression worked hard and learned to save. Now I grew up in the 80's in an upper middle class area - excess was the motto of the times. This is a hard lesson, but a good one. There is something to be learned in this crisis. It is sure kicking my butt, but I hope to be better off from it, and come out a saver and more humble person.
3 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.18.08, 08:23 PM [ Flag ]I like what you're saying; it's frightening but the humbling aspect appeals to me. We are middle class working parents (HHI $135,000) with kids in public school who have some debt (less than $5,000) because I was foolish and spend more on kids after school activities, x-mas presents, b-day gifts than I could reasonably afford. Full-time child-care is killing me but there's less than 1 year until my youngest is in ft kindergarden. Now at least when I am tempted to sign up my kid for one more fun activity that may help him get into high school, I know to pull back and say guitar lessons once a week are all that we can afford. Taking lunch to work, no clothing purchases (even at Old Navy), library instead of buying books, etc. None of this is suffering or deprivation but it's a start.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 08:31 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]ITA. We have cut our cable - I only watch 2,4, and 7 and 13. We are not eating out as much and have cut a lot of the extra classes that were not really necessary. I am going back to work part time and we are making a lot of our presents this year. I really need to shift my focus from entertainment outside the home that costs more than I can afford to spending quatlity time with my family and cutting out the extras so we can save and be more secure.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 08:35 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]^^it is not that we couldn't afford these things, it is that we couldn't save as much as I think we needed to - so we really couldn't afforf them. I am learning!
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 08:36 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] On UB, what does HHI include -- just salary, or salary plus bonus (if applicable). 2 replies
Talk : : November 18, 2008
On UB, what does HHI include -- just salary, or salary plus bonus (if applicable).
2 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.18.08, 06:39 PM [ Flag ]depends if you are trying to brag or if you're trying to generate some sympathy
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 06:42 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]I would say total compensation (so salary + bonus) but given the rancor of some of the moms here when it comes to the subject of bonuses, perhaps it's better to lowball!
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 06:44 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] How many of you SAHMs have full time nannies? 6 replies
- op: Also if you do what is your hhi?...
- I have full-time daycare and I am a SAHM but I only use it when I need to get stuff done. HHI 250K...
- HHI 400k...
Talk : : November 18, 2008
How many of you SAHMs have full time nannies?
6 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.18.08, 05:10 PM [ Flag ]op: Also if you do what is your hhi?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 05:12 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]I have full-time daycare and I am a SAHM but I only use it when I need to get stuff done. HHI 250K
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 05:14 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]full time nanny, 400k
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 05:23 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]where do you live?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 05:26 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]CT
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 05:31 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
HHI 400k
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 05:26 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] Poll: hhi, have you cut back on lifestyle, what has changed? 8 replies
Talk : : November 18, 2008
Poll: hhi, have you cut back on lifestyle, what has changed?
8 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.18.08, 04:10 PM [ Flagged ]80K, nothing has changed. I am going back to work soon.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 04:12 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Zero. Dh recently ue ( just starteddoing interim CFO work)I am sahm after 25 yrs of f/t work. We live from our capital. We turn down the heat to 60, pay cash as often as possible. Do our own repairs, don't buy clothes, drink cheap wine :)
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 04:14 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]how about you OP?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 04:15 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]60K, not much, just still cut coupons, try not to use heat,no extras, cook own meals.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 04:25 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
150K, use cash, spend less on clothes, shoes etc, eat out less. budget like crazy.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 04:16 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]$160k -- not really, we've always been on a budget (we're both teachers)! I just had major dental work (and have crappy dental insurance and didn't take enough flex spending -- and that has caused me to economize a bit (b/c I spent thousands on my mouth), but other than that, things are the same as always.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 04:24 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]250k, income hasn't changed. But retirement, college savings, etc., greatly reduced. We have cut back but not punitively. Eat at home more, dh and I don't buy much for ourselves, but still spend same on dc, next vacation will be of the budget variety.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 06:08 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]under 100k. we are kind of benefitting from everything that's going on b/c we are buying a house whereas before we couldn't afford to. things will be very tight and i'm nervous about it. we've cut back on groceries and other small expenses when possible.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 06:22 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
[+] Anyone cutting out or lowering doorman tips this season? DH just switched jobs (we ar... 161 replies
- HHI 300k, three kids. We're not rich, we're just not poorer than before...
Talk : : November 18, 2008
Anyone cutting out or lowering doorman tips this season? DH just switched jobs (we are thankful he has one) but there will be no bonus and we are struggling. Do you think large condo / co-ops will see a lot of this?
161 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.18.08, 10:14 AM [ Flagged ]you are aware, right, that most of us don't have jobs with a bonus?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:16 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]yes, but we were able to afford the extra tips b/c of the bonus.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:18 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]and DH base salary is not a lot... most of it used to come in the form of a bonus.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:18 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np: salary is salary and is fixed. bonus is bonus (extra, more, variable - usually not guaranteed.)
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:20 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Yeah.. ahh....no
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:42 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]in financially sound households that is how it is looked at. "Yeah..ah...no" is living beyond her/his means.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:45 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]no, it isn't. it is called working for an invesment bank.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:38 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]just for example, when my dh was hired, he was told, your base is minimal, your bonus each year will be X. and it has been. the base is a joke, just a place holder.... not expected to live off it, and NO ONE DOES. it is not the normal use of teh word bonus.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:40 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]sorry - your DH is not fiscally responsible if he depended on a bonus. Unless he has a guarantee in writing, it is discretionary.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:43 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]NP: That is like saying a waitress "fiscally irresponsible" for living off her tips instead of her $2/hour. A lot of people live off of discretionary income.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:46 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]right!
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:32 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
I'm guessing your DH doesn't work at a bank, because the poster above you is dead on -- this is EXACTLY how it works. Your bonus is what you're working for, the salary part is a placeholder.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:47 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]no, DH doesn't work at a bank. I do. I am front office. Nice stereotyping.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:52 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]obviously YOU don't work at a bank.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:52 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]hmmm. well, i guess one or two stupid people made it through the recruiting process. you prove it.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:53 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]if being realistic and living off my salary alone makes me stupid - I will take it over where you are any day!
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:54 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]you are a troll and your response must be fake. NO way you live off the salary with the saslary and bonus structure like my dh has. you'd be some wierd eccentric hermit if so.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:56 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Why can't you accept that someone can live off salary?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:01 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]ita
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:32 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]we saved a bundle. but it went up in smoke when the stock tanked. tell me again that is my fault.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:33 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]i can. you must not be the usual bnker, though.. i guess you must have no kids?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:35 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]my dh's salary was about 10% of our income. is yours?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:38 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I don't think your math is right. I don't think I have seen bonuses being 10x salary unless it is a trader who has an incredible, off the charts type of year or someone in the upper echelons of management (in which case, salary is approaching a million bucks).
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:49 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]i know what my dh makes. salary is 10% of bonus. he is middle to upper mgmt.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 04:05 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]do ANY of the women on UrbanBaby get laid? You are some of the most negative haters ever! Jeez girls, play nice!
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 12:44 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Yes, can't we all get along?
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 01:02 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
i guess we are scum of the earth and you are perfect. i can't even tell you how much i hate you right now. we are really struggling, in pain, with our misfortune which we did not cause. and you, you total absolute >>>>> have to rub it in likke this. I hope you lose your job.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:52 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]struggle is relative. you are on a computer right now. I suspect not in the cold. Not without lights. Not without food. Get over yourself and stop blaming wall street.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:53 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]i'm not blaming wall street at all! i'm saying you are being sanct9imonious about blaming wall street! this is a financial crisis of historical proportions, and al lyou can say is, you shouldn't have counted on getting a bonus, your are irresponsible. like we should have known we'd get fired and have no bonus and no posssibility of getting a job etc etc. my computer has nothing to do with it! i'm sure you'll lose your job soon too so I guess you can think to yourself how irresponsible youe were. should have lived off half of your salary. we personally saved 25% of our salary eveery year but it was in bank stock that is now worthless. tell me again how iresponsible we were and how perfefct you are you sutpic piljksdfkjlsadf;lkjaes;lk
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:59 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]you are being deliberately obtuse to score a cheap point. i am not starving and never claimed to. however, losing a job is painful. even though we were responsible and did save. that doesn't mean i think having a job with a bonus was irresponsible like this troll says.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:33 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
you really don't get it. year afeter year for decades, these poeple get their bonus based on this kind of conversation. it is a strange system but up until now it has worked. so it isn't irresonsible to depend on it at all. you must not be part of this system if you can't understand.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:55 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]see, but I am. I live it everyday. I live on my salary every year. I bank my bonus when it comes. I understand that it might be good, it might be bad or it might not be. That is the risk you take when you agree to be partially compensated with a bonus.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:57 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]i'm getting off of ub now. all i can say is, you are a truly mean person. i hope this karma comes back to you. i really really do hope you get what you deserve for your mean words.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:00 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]bye.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:03 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]NP: Right - accepting bonus-based compensation is a risk. And, as a finance professional, you should understand that different people manage risk differently. There IS a middle ground between "extremely conservative" and "irresponsible" that you aren't recognizing.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:23 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]but.... i never admitted to being irresponsible. in fact, we save a huge percentage of our bonus. i agree that a bonus based compensation may be riskier than the average job, depending on the circumstances of the average job.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:30 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]you are lucky if your bonus didn't tank with the market. most peole have suffered huge losses and most people have compassion. you don't
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:34 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]right -- just like being a waitress is a risk.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:35 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I was responding to the "I live only off my base salary and pretend I don't even get a bonus - in fact, I tell the bank I don't want it and give it back" OR.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:40 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]hmmm.... but spending only 10% of your income is just plain weird. saving is important but ... 90% ? unless that 10% is so high you can support a family on it....
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:47 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
hmmm. we did save, a whole lot. so much that the bonus wouldn't have mattered to us. so in that sense, we didn't "depend" on the bonus. we could have made it fine without it. but then, our savings were decimated by the market -- at the SAME TIME as we lost our income. MOST people would be hard hit by this. you seem to be one of the lucky ones that can be holier than thou. those who live in glass houses.... unless your savings will never be affected by the economy, you are just lucky
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:38 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Did your DH have a written guarantee when he was hired for annual bonuses?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:55 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]no, of ocurse not. do you have a written guarantee of your salary and a written guarantee that you will not be fired? b/c if not, you are financially iressponsibel to be spending your salary. according to this troll.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:31 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]this question is silly. do you have a written guarantee for your job? when you lost it (if you do) would that matter to you financially? b/c the situation is no different here, you know.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:36 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
It is also called being a doorman, apparently.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:41 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
yeah...ahh...actually, she is correct. Bonus is just a feel good way of controlling base salary.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:49 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]hope that zero bonus makes you all "feel good".
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:56 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np above: sorry - trying to explain to these idiots that "bonus" is really a misnomer; everyone depends on them as salary (those expecting that people should bank 100% of the yearly bonus are misinformed). I'm on your side, believe me.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:04 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]thank you (I'm not the "feel good" poster above but really appreciate seeing that there's at least one other person here who gets it. btw i plan to tip our doorman the usual tips. but it will be very hard to do so. we are exchanging NO gifts this year with family to do it.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:44 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
nnp: FWIW- I have never had a job with a bonus but I find this answer simple minded. In many fields the bonus is part of the reimbursement package. It may not be fixed, it may not be guaranteed, but within a range it is part of the compensation and as expected as any other reimbursement.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:45 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]wrong: it is based on your performance, your desk's performane and the banks/company's performance. 100% expected to be down or zero in a very bad year.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:47 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]So you can offer examples in finance/banking of people who did their job well and got no bonuses?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:55 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]hmmmm - why not pick up the newspaper and look at the 10s of thousands being laid off - think they ALL did their job not so well? Come back here in Feb and I will show you plenty of people who got goose eggs and did a fine job all year.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:00 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I'll take that as a "No. I can't offer examples."
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:20 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Wrong. I was giving even more of an example. These people were fired, i.e., NO BONUS. There will plenty of flat, zero or down bonuses this year -- they haven't been paid yet.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:23 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np: I read this as, you didn't read the post! she is offering you 10s of thousands of examples!
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:42 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]thanks. i am getting exhausted here.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:44 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
yes, i sure can, but I'm not giving you their names on this board. I know a lot of them. you must not know many bankers if you don't know any either.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:38 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Np: Yes. My dh. His desk made tens of millions of dollars this year. However, they are a credit intensive business and there is no credit. He just got fired.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 01:28 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
WRONG. maybe some traders expect that. the back officce people don't. they did their job and didn't lose any money. they also don't get the upside in great times. you just don't understand how an investment bank works
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:37 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]huh? only front office people should be fired when an employer is laying people off? You don't understand the interrelationship between profit center and support center. without one, you don't need the other. If the bank has a bad year, everyone suffers. front office and back. BONUSES are reflective of how desks do AND how the bank does overall. You do not understand IB structure.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:40 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]hmmm. don't thin ku understand back office..... i think that the cfo, treasurer, etc. get paid, don't you?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:44 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]or, think technology. do you think that they don't get a bonus? yes, they get one, and it is a lot of their salary -- but it doesn't go to zero b/c onof the desks tanked. if it did, they would all leave, and there would be no bank.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:46 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]NP: I work in legal, and I think the general expectation, prior to this year's events, was that our bonuses varied according to the performance of the bank, but to nowhere near the degree of those in profit centers. Meaning we got more in good times, but not as much more, and less in bad times, but not as much less. I don't expect the same to hold true this year, however - I think we'll be hit as hard as the business is.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:49 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]right, ita. don't see why this is so hard for others to understand.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:51 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
so if the front office has a bad year, the infrastucture of the bank doesn't need to exist anymore? no,, that would be bankruptcy and the bank disappearing. so long as the bank still exist, the back office needs to be paid.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:47 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I was talking about lay offs. If front office people disappear - there is less need for as many back office staffers.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:00 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
what bank do you work at that back office people get paid bonuses despite how the traders or the bank does?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:41 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]every bank in this country lady
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:45 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]what bank do you work at?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:59 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]i didn't mean the pay of the back office people isn't affected at all. but it goes up less and also goes down less. there is a minimum you need to pay people to keep thememployed and doing a tech job, for example, and the bank would not be able to comly with laws and regs woithout these people. they aren't getting zero, bellieve me. unless you literally want no bank to be around anymore.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:47 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
NP: And generally, in those fields, the fixed part of your compensation does not increase significantly over time - all your "raises" get incorporated into your bonus.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:47 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
surely you built bonuses into your annual budget? which budget doesn't include a bonus for yourself because that is not guaranteed income right?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:19 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]not exactly budgeting for DH to be laid off from Lehman.... we have savings and can live until we move -- but giving a ton of money in tips is pushing it... We have 17 people who work in our building!
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:21 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]give selectively if you can, to those who have really helped you, and some but less to those you never see. However, you can't NOT give tips - your doormen, etc rely on you too
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:24 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]NP: Shouldn't the doorman have a budget for himself that doesn't include tips? They aren't guaranteed income, after all.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:30 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]right...Ebenezer
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:32 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I'm just pointing out the double standard - if the OP and her DH should have been living off his base salary, why shouldn
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:36 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]^^^shouldn't the doorman be expected to live off his?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:36 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]op and dh's base salary is at least 6 figures. Doorman probably makes 30K if he's lucky
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:37 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I sure he can...that's not the point and if you don't get it then...oh well
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:39 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]i gave up a while ago. the brick wall was starting to hurt my head...
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:49 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
I agree with you on that.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:51 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
nnp: lol. you are totally right on this observation and it's hilarious how many people attacking finance folks who are struggling w/o bonuses will defend the service workers in the same position.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:37 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]ITA
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:57 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]jesus h. christ, it is hardly the same thing! one could well imagine a doorman with a family living from paycheck to paycheck. if a finance person is doing that, then they are just plain foolish
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:00 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]guess what. finance people don't all make that much. you are extrapolating from what you read in the paper. there are doormen in my building that make just as much as a finance person.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:43 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]amen.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:04 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Maybe all the exposure to money clouded your ability to distinguish between a family that's making $50k/year and one that make $500k/year.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:12 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]We don't make even close to 500,000 a year!
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:23 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I am referring to the people who argue about the PRINCIPLE of bonuses and how no one should liv life expecting a bonus; how everyone's budget should include only base salary and thus they should not be affected by decreased bonus; how they have no sympathy for anyone in finance who is struggling because of a lower bonus b/c they should have known to live within their means. These same principles should apply to *everyone* since it is a principle about frugal, smart budgeting regardless of the numbers.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:30 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]yeah, if you are talking abotu "bonus" in the usual sense of the word. that is not the sense that is being used by these investment banks. we are talking appples and oranges here.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:49 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
np: but that is THEIR bonus and they definitely get less in years when the economy is bad.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:32 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]yes, and I'm sure they're expecting it. But they also make minimum wage
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:33 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]not true. doormen are in a union and while they are certainly not paid big money, they get good wages and benefits. i believe starting salary is appx. $40K.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:41 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
just make sure you look each one in the eye when you tell them you aren't able to give them anything this year. I guess if you are moving it doesn't matter.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:24 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
We always use a bonus as just that--extra money. My dh isn't getting his this year and only got 1/3 of the bonus last year. The writing was on the wall and we prepared.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:23 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]yeah, we did too. but then our savings were decimated by the stock market and we are left with nothing. so nice for you that things are workign out better fo ryou...
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:43 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
we are very purposefully NOT going to do any cutting back, on charitable contributions or holiday tipping. Those will be the LAST thing we cut back on.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:19 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]good for you. this post is offensive to me for some reason!
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:21 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]can't imagine why...
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:23 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
ITA. We could easily save $500 a month by giving up weekly cleaning. I'd be happy to do it to save the money. But the woman who does it we've know for years, is a single mother, and needs the money far more than we need to save it. Same goes for charitable giving and tips.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:26 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]you pay someone $500 a month to clean your apartment?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:28 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Comes once a week to clean and do laundry. Pay her $125 for about 5 to 6 hours work.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:30 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]what if you just give her the money, then she could get another job and earn more! clean your own home.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:38 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]NP: I work F/T and "sacrifice" $80/wk to have someone clean so that I can spend time with my DH and kids on the weekend instead of cleaning house all day. If I were a SAHM, I could get it all done while the kids are in school, but on Sat -- my day off -- it takes 2x as long b/c kids want (and deserve) my attention. My one luxury.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 01:07 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
you're not cutting back on those things because you are wealthy.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:30 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]not really, its just that our income hasn't really changed. If everyone suddenly stops spending, just because some OTHER people lost their jobs, then a LOT MORE people will be losing their jobs. This is a good time to keep it all in perspective.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:38 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Okay Obama
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:43 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]ohhh, if only he were focused on jobs creation.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:48 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
yup, you're rich
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:49 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]HHI 300k, three kids. We're not rich, we're just not poorer than before
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:58 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
great, lots of us have no income now.. so nice of you to be sanctimoneyious (haha) here about your luck.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:50 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]they'll be lamenting the loss of jobs on Wall Street soon enough. trickle down, baby!
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:33 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
I think we should all cut back on those things. Dh has been laid off and has no prospects. It is clear to me that the entire city will need to adjust compensation expectations. I was horrified when our management company came back with our co-op budget that included an increase in the supers bonus. I find it distasteful in this enviroment.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:41 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]To be totally honest, tipping is the one thing I will not cut back on and in fact may increase, where it is merited. Consider that all the people who are in service industries are suffering and rely on those tips.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:45 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Like Wall Street workers relied on bonus's. I find the double standard interesting. Doormen make about 70-80,000... not much less than my DH base salary... but it's wrong for him to expect a bonus -- but the doormen can expect $$$$$ in tips
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:48 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np: screw them then. stiff
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:50 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]so you really don't have enough $ to tip your doorman who works for you np: at your home?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:50 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]If you screw the doorman, just pray you never get a package, get locked out of your house, need someone let into your house to fix something...don't mess.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:53 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]NP: By that logic, I guess the company the OR's DH works for should pray they don't need him to perform any of his job functions next year either, since they "screwed" him out of his bonus.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:58 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]then they can just lay DH off.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:01 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]right -- and the doorman can get laid off, too. such a compassionate answer
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:42 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
this is the thing. When you don't tip the doormen, proactively, the service gets worse.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:00 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]what do you think residents WITHOUT doormen do?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:59 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]save money, and have no one to take their packages and shit
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:01 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
I'm not OP, but we spent upwards of $500 in doorman tips last year...as much as I wish we were still in this position, realistically I know that things are precarious = less money to spend on tips.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:57 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]of course if you are in serious trouble I can totally understand. But some of these people who are "living off of their savings" of over $4million then claim to have to cut back on things like tips to people who make their home a nicer place make me sick.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:59 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Thank you, Agreed.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:03 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]poster from above - I agree with you, and I assure you that we are SO not living off $4m in savings. I friggin wish.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:10 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]yeah, but most of us aren't like this. such a witch hunt going on by really ignorant people.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:41 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
I totally agree. The hypocrisy is insane.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:54 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]tritto. and actually kind of funny because the hypocrites aren't able to see their error even though it's glaringly obvious.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 10:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]np: honestly i just think it's a different mindset. generally speaking the rich have always been less charitable than the middle income folks.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:02 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]A lot of those "middle income folks" just don't like rich people (or those they perceive to be rich). That's the biggest mindset I'm seeing lately on UB - if you are "rich" you aren't allowed to have any problems because you (a) are a bad person and (b) brought it upon yourself.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:08 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]well I don't see that but I do think for the first time many "rich people" are facing problems they never fathomed they would encounter. I understand the shock, trauma, etc. Perhaps we will all be the better for it.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:11 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np. ITA. The "rich" have more to lose, so they tend to get a little more panicked in bad times. Those with less tend to be a little more philosophical because they are used to going without luxuries.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:15 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
ITA. This is a good assessment.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:23 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
do you also consider a blowjob to be a form of a bonus?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:00 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]no, that's my job
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:01 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]funny.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:02 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Doormen do NOT make 70-80k. Supers maybe, yes.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:14 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Actually, the ones in our building do. The head guys who have been there for 20 yrs make over 70,000$ plus OT. signed - member of co-op board
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:22 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Has to be with lots of OT. If they are in the 21bJ union top pay caps out at 45K. Unless the board took it upon themselves to give raises above and beyond. Signed pres. of Condo Board who has copy of collective bargining agreement in his hand.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:12 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
What have you been smoking - doormen are n union - full salary is about 42K w/o OT.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:10 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]pleeeeeeease you're comparing apples to orages when it comes to bonuses. and i'm sure your dh doesn't have to deal with all of the obnoxious people in your building.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 04:03 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
yes. I am on a coop board and there will definitely be reining in by tenants on the YE bonus / tipping front. It will trickle down.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:10 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]to the bonus lady -- bonus sounds like some optional thing thatcomes only every now and then for exceptional performance. for my dh, it is 80% of his salary. he owuld never do this job for the 20% (no one would0. the "bonus" is mis named.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 11:34 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]We will be giving everyone $10 less so that we can afford to give them all a tip.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:08 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I'm an IBer. Ever since I took the job several years ago out of grad school - we have made the decision to make the monthly expenses work based on the salary. We thought to ourselves, if the analysts can do it, then so should we. I think most of my cohorts do the same. Every December when bonus numbers are announced, we talk about the extra things we will buy with it - several of us who have kids inevitably pay off old school debt or save for our child's education. So I guess, one is in the minority if s/he uses the bonus for monthly expenses.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:23 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]if you're struggling, the doorman struggles more. give him the tip
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:32 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]stupid rationale.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 12:34 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Frankly in this economy, NYC doormen are probably not the ones who struggle the most. Would make more sense to give any extra dollar to food pantries or other charitable institutions. Look at the situation in Haiti for instance.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 01:31 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
why do you need to tip the doormen? unless they offer you extraordinary services, they are just doing their job, for which they earn a salary. If you have no money to give away, don't.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 02:11 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]you obviously do not live in manhattan. doormen are extremely important in how well a building is run.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 04:29 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
I can't really remember what we gave them last year (our first year as coop owners and we foolishly didn't write it down) so we may unwittingly be cutting back but I don't want to. Our building has a small staff though.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 03:38 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]we all can afford a little extra - especially at the holidays.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 04:26 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]So, um now all of the people who are crowing about the demise of Wall Street, how do you feel now knowing the doorman, the super, the babysitters etc etc will now get less at holiday time, or may lose their jobs? See how TRICKLE DOWN works? You stupid assholes, you probably still think it's good. As long as the Richie Riches get theirs, who cares what happens, right? It's bad for EVERYONE. The sooner you get your heads out of your asses and realize that, the better off we'll all be.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 05:09 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Personally, I've been thinking of tipping more this year because I'm 38 weeks pregnant and everyone on the building staff have been so helpful throughout my pregnancy. The doorman never let me carry anything heavy, always asking how I'm feeling, etc. I know they will continue to be doing more for me once the baby arrives, so I was planning on tipping a bit more than previous years to show my appreciation.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 12:54 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]I'm going to actually reply to your question: No. We don't have a doorman, but we do have a Saturday sitter and we usually make our annual donation to our son's private school in December. We are not going to lower either. These people are important to our family's overall quality of life...and we can far more afford to keep the dollars up than they are to lose them. I think just as some investment banker types wait for their annual bonuses, people and institutions wait for those annual holiday contributions to get through the rest of the year. We'll cut out some dinners, some Starbucks, we're not taking a vacation this year out of town, but for those people who are part of the fabric of our lives, I'm not cutting back.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 07:26 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]I'll cut back on something for myself before I cut back on tips for the people that rely on them. I think you have to think hard about what struggling really means. I'm not saying you're doing this, but I believe that many people stop donating to charities and cut back on tips citing the economy... but these folks can afford to continue to tip and donate , it's just a good excuse.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 07:31 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] i have been a wohm since dc's were born, over five years now, and I am still not used... 7 replies
- Oh dear, I completely misread. What's your HHI minus your current salary?...
Talk : : November 17, 2008
i have been a wohm since dc's were born, over five years now, and I am still not used to it. I cry at least once a week, I miss everything and am generally so depressed about it. at the same time we desperately need my income...
7 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.17.08, 07:21 PM [ Flagged ]Good heavens, go back to work!!
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:23 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]she is working.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:27 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Oh dear, I completely misread. What's your HHI minus your current salary?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:51 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
do you think you are depressed? b/c this doesn't sound very normal.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:25 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]yes i am very depressed
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:31 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np-I'm sorry you're depressed. Are you seeing someone? Have you tried to find work at home situations or to tight your familues budget so you income isn't needed?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 10:30 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Which town is more infected with competitive, snobby, type-A parents: Scarsdale or Bronxville?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 10:50 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
[+] It cracks me up when people say they can get by on HHI of $100K so they don't get why... 19 replies
- op: I live in the city. Have a HHI slightly above $100K and I get by. I can see people struggling with $250K...
Talk : : November 17, 2008
It cracks me up when people say they can get by on HHI of $100K so they don't get why people need/deserve more! There are people who get by on less than $40K, and to them, you seem obscenely rich and unreasonable.
19 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.17.08, 06:58 PM [ Flag ]not in manhattan
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:59 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]AMEN
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:59 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]This is Urban Baby. You cannot live, with children, even sparingly in NYC for less than $100k. You just can't. So go to another board for the burbs.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:59 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]op: I live in the city. Have a HHI slightly above $100K and I get by. I can see people struggling with $250K... no doubt they have more things and more expenses, but a loss of income has got to hurt them as well. All I'm saying...
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:03 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]100K + Rent Control in PS 41 zone = No problem.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:08 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Rent control should be revoked. Such a dumb law.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:10 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Not for the elderly. They are the ones who are primarily protected.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:14 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Why? No such thing as rich old people?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:15 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Duh. I MEANT the elderly poor. They didn't do anything wrong if their neighborhoods gentrified around them.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:18 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
yes. But really, if you make $100k, you arent entitled to rent control, are you.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:11 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]entitled, yes. sadly that is the law. Deserving, no.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:15 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]120K is the cut off for two years in a row.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:20 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]175k for 2 consecutive years if the apartment rents for MORE than $2k per month.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:23 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
That's not true. My salary is $50K. It's tough, but we get by.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:16 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]OP: Exactly. If you can get by in $50K, you can easily call people on $100K extravagant. All I'm saying is that folks on here shouldn't judge people who earn $300K/$1M/etc. They all just have a different life.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:19 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]And they choose to live an extravagant lifestyle. YOu can live modestly on a high salary. It's actually possible. I give you my parents, who do nothing remotely exotic, unless you call occasional travel and season tickets to the symphony exotic.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:26 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
is that on one income though?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:21 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Nope.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:27 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]b/c we did that on one income. not fun, but doable. i think it would've been very difficult for us to do on two incomes while paying for childcare.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:30 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] A sick part of me is kind of laughing that a lot of super wealthy people are losing (... 57 replies
- but we're actually not lmc (hhi is 300k). I just don't like the uber-rich....
- NP: Well, in theory, yes. But I must say, as a mom whose HHI is never greater than 70K (and that's in a good year, we freelance), I have to guffaw at these dumb IB types who are like "...
Talk : : November 17, 2008
A sick part of me is kind of laughing that a lot of super wealthy people are losing (or have lost) their jobs.
57 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.17.08, 05:58 PM [ Flagged ]it is called schadenfruede. very common among the lmc.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:00 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]really? there is a name for this? I am not sad that Goldman Sachs top execs will not be getting their 40M in bonus, but I do feel bad for the average upper class worker who is laid off. Losing your job sucks at any income level.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:02 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]NP: Well, in theory, yes. But I must say, as a mom whose HHI is never greater than 70K (and that's in a good year, we freelance), I have to guffaw at these dumb IB types who are like "Oh no, my husband got laid off, we only have my 250K salary to rely on, whatever shall we do?" Yeah, I do revel in the Schadenfreude of it all.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:04 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]ita. We live comfortably on 100K and I have a hard time feeling sympathy for people when they are so scared because they can't save for babies college as much, or go on their yearly trip to an exotic island.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:07 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Or have full-time live-in help or pay $7000 a month in rent. Come on! That isn't reality.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:10 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]it's my reality
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 07:53 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
i agree that those posts are ridiculous but in general one should never wish ill on others or revel in others' misfortune. just my karma side talking.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:16 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]there is a difference between not feeling terribly bad for them and wishing ill - I am not happy that they have lost their jobs, I just don't think it is such a tragic situation and these people will be relatively fine compared to someone who makes 30K a year and loses their job - that person I feel for.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:21 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]ok, if you are OP, you have gone from laughing at them to not feeling terribly bad for them. if i keep working here maybe you will feel some empathy at some point.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:24 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]not op
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:34 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]so no chance at empathy?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:36 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]nah
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:37 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]ok then. just know that when something bad happens to you, someone, somewhere will not be feeling too sorry for you.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:38 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]ok, no problem
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:40 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
sadly I don't think the majority will be 'relatively fine' - there is literally no place for them to go in their industries. personally, I'm not relishing the competition I'm going to be facing soon when all these people hit other occupations.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:24 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
but we're actually not lmc (hhi is 300k). I just don't like the uber-rich.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:03 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]to some, you are the uber rich.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:04 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]not in Manhattan we definitely NOT
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:05 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]^are
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:05 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]But in most circles, you REALLY are. I don't live there, but I'm pretty sure most would agree that Manhattan isn't the real world.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:40 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]but op is referring to Manhattan
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:44 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]OP didn't make any geographic comments. But since nothing outside of Manhattan is worth anything, lets keep our comments relevant to the island.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 07:21 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
there are MANY people in manhattan who do not make even close to 300k!!!
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 08:09 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
why? envy?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:06 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]op: big time jealousy!
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:07 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]at least you can admit that.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:08 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
The fact that you do not understand that this is bad for you you is so sad for you family. Wait till this hits you.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:07 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I know, which is why I said "a SICK part of me". It's bad, I know. But hey, just being honest (and I think I speak for a lot of people who won't admit it).
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:09 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]i don't think it is sick. I openly do not feel terribly sorry for people who no longer can afford a luxurious lifestyle.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:11 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Ditto. And, while we're at it, tritto
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:13 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]the post wasn't about losing luxurious lifestyles, it was about losing jobs.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:28 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I feel worse for the families living pay check to pay check who lose a job and can't afford health insurance or healthy food and are having their homes and cars repo'd.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 07:23 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
see the funny thing is that people like me are rooting for people like you to fall on hard times. b/c i'm not competing with the people earning 10 million a year. i'm buying the same things you are buying (nanny/childcare, private school tuition, a vacation once a year, affordable clothing) but you are ruining it for me b/c you have too much money!
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:37 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]please explain - how is that ruining it for you?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:40 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]nanny hourly rates go up. tuition goes up and competition for private school admissions go up. b/c there are so many people earning hundreds of thousands of dollars a year.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:44 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]you still do not make any sense
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:45 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np: I totally understand the argument. Supply and demand. Because you (300K) can pay 15 dollars per hour for a nanny, and there is a limited supply of nannies, you drive the price up for everyone. This is also true with the housing market...You can put down 25% of a larger purchase price and still have liquid assets to meet coop board approval. The limited manhattan housing stock is directly influenced by bonuses, wall street and increasing salaries.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:06 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]thank you. i have no head and no patience to try to explain myself.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:13 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Glad I can use my Wharton MBA for something besides changing diapers;)
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:14 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]lol
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:28 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
enjoy that laugh now, cause it's gonna trickle down...how long did it take for you to hear about the city pushing for a commuter tax?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:02 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I completely support the commuter tax and increased in tolls (especially over the east river). These bridge and tunnel folks are clogging our streets, mean and nasty, and dirty. They should just all pack up and go back to Ohio where everyone is mean.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:10 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]YES: Commuters are Bad
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:12 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]East River Tolls would help pay for the subway up keep.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:12 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
I can not wait for the commuter tax. Does anyone know how this will work? Maybe they will issue "papers" for non Manhattanites... Fun!
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:13 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I still think they should find a way to charge all cars moving below 72nd street. Why don't they have parking meters OR Resident parking permits? I'd gladly pay for a permit and then have the bridge and tunnel folks pay from a meter. Works other places and a good source of income.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:16 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
here here
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 06:43 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]hear, hear
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 06:48 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]meant to write "there there" as in consoling op.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 07:18 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Enjoy it while you can. Do you remember NY in the 70s perchance? Oh just wait, just wait. Let me refresh your memory...filth, crime, poverty, horrid mass transit. Libraries closing, museums under severe financial stress, schools suffering. So while you may begrude the superwealthy their $, it does have an effect on all of us. If you think you're now going to be able to move to CPW now and get live in help, think again.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 06:41 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Are you really saying there are only two alternatives for this city?
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 08:12 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Enjoy it now. It will affect you and everyone else who lives in this city very negatively. Just this morning I bought coffee from the cart vendor infront of the Citi headquaters and the two guys inside were worried about surviving if 20% of their customers stop coming to work. We are all interconnected you know.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 06:52 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I don't think the high level citi exec or any other high level exec is going to claim the coffee guy at the corner. But the coffee guy does know we're interconnected.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 07:24 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]The sick part of you that is laughing also extends to the honest, hard-working nanny and driver I used to employ and their families who have a harder time weathering the storm. Of course, I miss their services, but I was sadder that it would affect them directly as well.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 07:27 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
don't laugh, especially if you live in NYC. We are likely to have more crime, the $ for trash collection and transit will be down too, so more crowded subways and more rats. Really folks, we are all in this together, whether we like it or not.
[ Reply | Options ]11.18.08, 08:08 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I am definitely reveling in the schadenfreude. I read some boo-hoo news article about a marriage breaking up because they hit "hard times" after the husband lost his job and now they only have her 300k income... they'd just ordered $35,000 draperies and are now moving because of the split.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 01:00 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Gaah. Post got cut off. So... I wanted to finish by saying that it's terrible that he lost his job and that they are splitting up, but why are they ordering ridiculous window treatments if they don't have enough savings to cover the rent? The showy, greedy consumerism of some of these folks makes it hard to feel sorry for them.
[ Reply | Options ]11.19.08, 01:04 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
[+] We only have about $15-$18K in savings. HHI is about $100K (me-FT job, DH - freelanc... 2 replies
Talk : : November 17, 2008
We only have about $15-$18K in savings. HHI is about $100K (me-FT job, DH - freelancer). I know it should be more but is there anyone out there with less than that or we just screwed?
2 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.17.08, 12:13 PM [ Flag ]I have less. 15-18 won't get you that far though.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:30 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]you aren't screwed if you are able to pay your bills and still keep putting a little away.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:32 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] Times are hard and I am so relieved we have savings to fall back on. How many others... 47 replies
- jobs where we don't get ANY bonus, let alone bonuses so substantial you could live off of them. We have a lifestyle many here would probably consider borderline poverty in order to save as much as possible, but with a relatively low HHI there's only so much saving one can do....
Talk : : November 17, 2008
Times are hard and I am so relieved we have savings to fall back on. How many others feel they have been saving effectively?
47 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.17.08, 11:14 AM [ Flagged ]Not us. Very anxious.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:16 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]My DH was laid off a few weeks ago. With severance and emergency savings we should be fine for two years, but we don't plan to be without a paycheck that long. Since we've lived off 30% of his salary, we feel relieved (now grateful for that although I wasn't before. We were comfortable, but not a grand lifestyle). Still it's scary (although he seems to be getting close to a few job offers).
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:21 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Thanks to my DH and his very frugal ways, we have a lot saved (whew). I know this might sound heartless and I know how expensive it is to live in NYC, but I have heard stories of people having to move their families out of the city immediately b/c they can't affort high rents/mortgage or private school and I just can't understand how people can live like that, completely living on their bonus (spending it way before they get it) and having absolutely no cushion at all...
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:35 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]You know, some of us don't work in jobs where we don't get ANY bonus, let alone bonuses so substantial you could live off of them. We have a lifestyle many here would probably consider borderline poverty in order to save as much as possible, but with a relatively low HHI there's only so much saving one can do.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:40 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]^^ scratch that second "don't".
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:41 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]OR: I was referring to people in finance who get traditionally high bonuses...and just pretty much live large without saving anything for just this type of situation...
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:46 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Thanks for clarifying. Sorry if I sounded defensive. My anxiety's not helping.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 05:13 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
us, although its less than it used to be because almot all invested. still, i'm glad we've consistently lived below our HHI.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:17 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]We're in very good shape. Dh and I are very aware of the fact that we have it better than 99% of the country right now.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:17 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]approx. how much savings do you have? I'm just wonder when people says "savings" what they actually mean?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:17 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]we have approx 4m in cash not counting retirement (which has taken a beating)
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:21 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]it that 4 million or 4 months???
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:23 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]$4m
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:28 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]and that is equivalent to two years of savings for you?? you must know that you are in a different league than the vast majority of the people who live here -- even those that are considered comfortable. to have even amassed that much in cash would have required an income of well over a million every year (unless there is other stuff going on that you're not disclosing). your dh is likely a hedge fund guy, or an MD investment banker -- perhaps even a senior partner at a law firm, though it's unlikely in that case he would have been laid off.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:55 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np: or perhaps she is lying for fun
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:58 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I didn't say it was saved over 2 years. It was saved over the last 10yrs and I know how fortunate we have been. We also own two homes without any mortgages. we are not in finance fwiw and never expected to earn as much as we have nor do we count on it. just feeel incredibly fortunate
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:59 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Wow, 4m more than my dh and I earned total over the last ten years. Given how much you must be earning, of course you are comfortable.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:25 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I mean, 4m IS more than...
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:25 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
i didn't say you saved it over two years -- you're the one who said it was the equivalent of two years of savings (which i took to mean that you could live on that amount for two years, which implies a lifestyle far more affluent than even comfortable NYers). my point is that you must have REALLY high paying jobs to have saved that even over 10 years (which implies you've made much more than that over that 10-year period). we make about $750k per year and live pretty well in NYC (one child, public school), own our apt (with a mortgage), but have not made that income for the past 10 years (we're in our young 40s -- like most people, our income has increased over the past several years -- 10 years ago, we probably made half of what we make today, even less, likely. so, i say again, you are in a very different circumstance than even well off people in NY. so different that your situation isn't really relevant to what the average NYer is going through now. (you don't even have housing expenses really, yet $4m would last you only two years? i don't really get it.)
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:38 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]i didn't say it was = to 2 years of saving. regardless, we have been making around 2m a year for the past 8 yrs. not sure how we will do going forward but we are very pleased to be in this position. more concerned with preserving and growing our $ at this point.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:42 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]that's a great and steady income for a lot of years. you are indeed very fortunate.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:59 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
oh yeah that's savings all right!
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:23 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
how much savings do you have that you feel comfy?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:17 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]6 months worth of expenses, mortgage, food, car, insurance, etc. That is without any cuts to our budget. If we made cuts we could probably go much longer.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:18 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]just spill it. whats the dollar amount? we don't know who you are!
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:20 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]$60,000, liquid in an ING account. There are other investments, but they are long term and with the market the way it is we don't want to touch them.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:24 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]we have $1 million in cash and the rest in stocks and bonds.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:30 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
We have enough to last about 6 months which in normal market would be fine, but in this market does not seem like enough
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:30 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]we had $5million last year when Dh lost his job so we were not worried. Now we are under $1M since most of it was in a financial company that has lost most of its value. Dh still has no job and now we are getting worried.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:33 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]you are worried with 1 million in the bank? Excuse me?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:49 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]we are worried because there are still no job prospects and cushion has been decimated. Yes, we are still fine but we have very young children and many years to go when we thought we had a nest egg.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:03 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]then I assume you plan to relocate?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:56 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]kids are in school so not unless a job comes up somewhere else. Our families are from here so there is no where to go. Dh is open to relocate for work and is talking to two non-US companies.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:59 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Oh that is awful! Were you waiting for it to vest? I know so many people that left there vested money in and now have next to nothing. it is so important to diversify.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:56 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
We're OK. We could probably run a couple of years without any income at all and my spouse's job is iron-clad.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 11:51 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]what kind of job is iron clad?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:01 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Tenured professor.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:04 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]tenured trust fund professor?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:11 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Unfortunately, no. So we're not getting rich on it, but it's secure.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:30 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
even though our family has been "spared" from the economic crisis we are still budgeting and watching every penny big time. we wouldn't consider it appropriate to be spending unnecessarily right now.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:21 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Who knows who is going to be spared?? This is just begining - unless our new president can pull a rabbit out of a hat - this economic crisis is going to be long and deep.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:24 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np EXACTLY. For now, my family is fine, but who knows if we've been "spared". I have cut my spending quite considerably--and I usually spend quite a bit. Will do very low-key Christmas (my kids would be happy with a few cheap gifts as with many $$$ones) and likely no vacation at spring break. Feel WAY happier and more comfortable reeling in the spending while we're OK than ending up in panic mode because we've spent too much.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:29 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]by spared i mean, my dh probably won't lose his job. it's highly unlikely, i didn't say never, just very unlikely.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 01:02 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
same with our family. dh has a fairly stable job, but we are still cutting back.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:27 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
this kind of economy actually punishes people who save. at the rate of the bailouts going on in DC, the fed has to print a lot more dollars and they will be worth a lot less soon. get ready for hyper-inflation.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:27 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I think it's still better to save but with the market crash it also seems less brilliant to me that I scraped by to put all my money in my 401K. I got laid off so no company match for me, and what I did put in is down 40%. I could be unemployed with a few nice pieces of furniture instead!
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 12:42 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]are you retiring tomorrow? presumably, you're in your 30s or 40s and therefore, if you're like most people, won't retire for another 20 years. your 401k investment will come back. the market is cyclical, like everything else. if you were retiring in the next 5-8 years, i'd be worried. if not, relax. you'll be okay.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 01:01 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
[+] I love to have plans and be with people, but most people annoy me...is this a strange... 17 replies
- Are you the same poster below with HHI of 250K, owns apt, forced to send dc to public school?...
Talk : : November 17, 2008
I love to have plans and be with people, but most people annoy me...is this a strange contradiction in terms? how do i reconcile these feelings within myself?
17 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.17.08, 07:36 AM [ Flag ]Most people probably sense your bad attitude and only agree to have plans with you because their kids like your kids.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:38 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]wow. thanks. why do i have a bad attitude????
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:39 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]you are unhappy with your life
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:41 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]yes, that is true. I would like to change it but don't know how.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:42 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]well, why are you unhappy?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:43 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
Are you the same poster below with HHI of 250K, owns apt, forced to send dc to public school?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:42 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]absolutely not, I live in the burbs...children go to public school no questions asked. I am generally unhappy though...
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:43 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]but what is it in your life that makes you unhappy? what is missing?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:44 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]my marriage is stale, my career is stale, I just feel blahhhh, but why does that explain why I love being with people but most people annoy me???
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:45 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]because most people have the things that you do not
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:46 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]i think you are right. oh. what do i do about that? I am such a bitter misery...how do i end the cycle?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:48 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]You have to decide to take some action in your life to change the things that are not making you happy. Work on your marraige, find a way to make your job more interesting- or look for a new job. Don't just sit in your misery waiting for someone to help you. Help yourself.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:50 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I am not sure how...I feel stuck...I can't afford to make changes, and don't have time to make things more interesting. I balance a career and two children and try to have some semblance of a life. I guess I am jealous of everyone around me...
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:52 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]If you can't do it for yourself, do it for your dc's. They see their jealous, unhappy mother. Do you want them to be like you?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:54 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
One day at a time. Decide to be happy. Wake up one morning. Today I am going to be happy. A, B, & C are not going to piss me off or make me sad. Today I will be happy. Tomorrow isn't here yet and yesterday's in the past. I can't do anything about them. But today, today I will be happy.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:45 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]that is all good in theory, but it does not change my marriage, career, state of affairs with my friends etc. please explain your theory?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:47 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Decide its not going to bother you. Decide that inheirantly you are going to be a happy person. Don't sweat the small stuff. Its all a state of mind.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:55 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] Congrat's to poster below whose dc got 97 ERB. Got our schore today too. It's as high... 50 replies
- our HHI is 150 and we own and pay tuition for private school. You can do it if you...post OP feels she can't pay tuition because of HHI and owning apt....
- Are you for real? If their HHI is now 250K I am assuming they have recently...FA to attend private schools (because of the house). HHI is 150. The subtext here is you can't...straight. you have NO housing costs, 1 dc, a hhi of $250k and you are heartsick??? BOO F&CKING HOO....
Talk : : November 17, 2008
Congrat's to poster below whose dc got 97 ERB. Got our schore today too. It's as high as can be but sadly, we now know that private school is simply not an option for us financially. I am heartsick. We still don't qualify for FA (HHI will now be around 250K and we own apt.) but I will just assume my dc will be OK. So sad.
50 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.17.08, 07:22 AM [ Flagged ]our HHI is 150 and we own and pay tuition for private school. You can do it if you want to.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:24 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]what a stupid comment. You have no idea what kind of monthly outlaw OP's family has
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:26 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]outlay^
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:26 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Based on the info in the post OP feels she can't pay tuition because of HHI and owning apt.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:26 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Are you for real? If their HHI is now 250K I am assuming they have recently lost one income and that it could have been that or significantly more.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:27 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Why would any intelligent person assume that OP lost one income recently based on her post?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:29 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]um - because they obviously applied to provates and took the ERB and "now know" private is too much $ for them?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:31 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]poor planning
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:33 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]You sound like a bitter person.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:39 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Monthly outlay? Because if they have a monthly outlaw do they have to wear masks like Zorro?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:27 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Those swords are expensive, too.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:27 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]SCHMUCK - np
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:28 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I see your schmuck and raise you a swashbuckler!
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:29 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
and do you have 2 kids? a mortgage from a purchase made within the last 3 years?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:27 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Before you go off any more- none of this is in your post.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:28 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]It doesn't have to be. I can make a post on here b/c I am sad and I don't OWE everyone in anonymous land all the facts
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:29 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]But you don't have to be a b$$ch when someone tells you that tuition is not out of the question based on the info you do provide in your post.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:30 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]So do you want a pity party or advice?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:31 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I WANT A PITY PARTY!
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:32 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]You poor thing. You make a quarter of a million dollars. The average income for a family of four in the United States is $53,000 a year. But your dcs can't go to private anymore because you have other costs you deem more important. You poor thing.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:33 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np: I like you.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:35 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I play a bitch in really life as well. But damn I have a good time calling people on their shit.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:41 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np: i bet you don't, really. you know you're ugly through and through. nobody that mean is satisfied with their own life.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:59 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Oh but I am. I'm generally a happy person. I just don't let other people pull their BS on me.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 08:01 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]then you are in denial. op is just bummed out about a recent development in her life, if you can't give her a break, and if you are truly this bitchy in real life, i stand by my statement that you are probably rotten inside.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 08:04 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]And there are a lot of people far worse off, in this board throught the city and across the country.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 08:11 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np: but who cares? we are not here to shoot down every other person for not having problems that are the worst imaginable. you sound so petty and rageful. blech!!!
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 08:44 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Go to hell. You will of course b/c when more and more people like OP's DH lose their big $ jobs, , 3-5 people in service industries then lose jobs too.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:40 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]and they are not in Manhattan Toos
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:41 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Because the only people living in Manhattan make six figures? Seriously?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:44 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]If they have a gifted dc they now can't send to a top school I see why OP feels bad
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:52 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np - I have a gifted dc who goes to a top school. It *is* public though.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 08:00 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]G&T though or PS6 though right?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 08:05 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
i don't know why but this is such a funny line..anonymous land. you are correct, you're asking specifically for pity and all these mean people respond with their petty jealous comments. here is your pity: i would imagine it would be heartbreaking to know that your kid could probably get into a great school, but you can't manage it. i wonder if somehow you could apply and figure it out? talk to psd, maybe she has some ideas.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 08:02 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]THANK YOU
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 08:06 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
You could apply for FA if you have more than 1 dc.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:28 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Maybe but ideally, DH wants to work and will be aggressively looking for a job now. I am now the sole breadwinner.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:28 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]DH will likely have another job by the time dc starts in private school, isn't it way too soon to throw in the towel?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:34 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]She may have to cancel her trip to Aruba to pay the first installment of tuition.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:36 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I know. I am just sad
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:41 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
You will get little sympathy on here. There are seriously botter sickos relishing that others who made more are hruting.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:40 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]How did your dc do on the SB V?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:59 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]So sorry - that must be upsetting. Have you taken the Stanford Binet or signed up for the OLSAT? I bet your dc will do very well and you could do a g&t.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 08:55 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]np: 250K sounds like an awfully good salary to me. We're a family of 4 on 90K and live very nicely. I bet you could cut corners to get the money for private school. It's a matter of priorities. If you are indeed "heartsick", then cut back elsewhere to make it work. If you look at your spendings, you might find things that are unnecessary that you could eliminate or at least scale back on.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 09:48 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]ITA. There'a a REASON her family wouldn't qualify for FA--and that's because they can afford to pay tuition (for one kid--might get FA for a second).
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 09:56 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]We own our house and would probably need FA to attend private schools (because of the house). HHI is 150. The subtext here is you can't get FA if you own a house. is that true? dc got a 99 on the erb so we are thinking we will do whatever it takes if she gets into a nice school (applied for 4). What is the FA wisdom out there?
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:10 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Depends on the house.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:35 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]This is a brooklyn house in a hip but super middle class area. Its worth, arguably, a little over a million.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:40 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
let me get this straight. you have NO housing costs, 1 dc, a hhi of $250k and you are heartsick??? BOO F&CKING HOO. yeah, so sad you don't have a clue.
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:42 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I think they "own" but prob. pay their mortgage...
[ Reply | Options ]11.17.08, 07:47 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
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HHI $155K - do we qualify for fa?
4 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.15.08, 07:24 PM [ Flagged ]Yes. You'd probably get somewhere between 50 and 60% of tuition in aid.
[ Reply | Options ]11.15.08, 07:26 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Do both parents work?
[ Reply | Options ]11.15.08, 08:48 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]dh works, I am sahm with a toddler as well, and a new small-biz owner, but just breaking even
[ Reply | Options ]11.15.08, 09:08 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Financial aid also depends on assets and other financial obligations: how much money you have in the bank; whether you have a second home; tuition for other children; support of a parent. No one can answer your question accurately without the full picture.
[ Reply | Options ]11.16.08, 06:00 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
[+] Please describe: typical parent at downtown/brooklyn progressive 1 reply
- they have a HHI over 300K or are on FA?...
Talk : : November 15, 2008
[+] We haven't yet decided whether to apply for private schools. Our HHI is 300K. Many pe... 3 replies
Talk : : November 14, 2008
We haven't yet decided whether to apply for private schools. Our HHI is 300K. Many people think we make a decent living but the truth is 300k doesn't carry that far in NYC? Are we eligible for FA for 2DCs?
3 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.14.08, 07:45 PM [ Flagged ]It depends on other expenses, but it is possible - not much though
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 08:00 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]No. We didn't qualify at 180k.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 08:04 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]very unlikely
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 08:34 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
[+] UB always has a class war going on. What do people think 'wealthy' means? Curious a... 20 replies
- i think there are a lot of people in nyc with very high HHI who live a "wealthy" lifestyle but whose new worth does nto qualify them as "wealthy"...
- this is interesting. our hhi is $2m and i don't consider us 'wealthy'...
Talk : : November 14, 2008
UB always has a class war going on. What do people think 'wealthy' means? Curious about the haters and those that call themselves wealthy. Are they even talking about the same thing? For me wealthy is having a net worth of 10m or more. Not less. Is this the common consensus?
20 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]11.14.08, 09:33 AM [ Flag ]it's a relative term, isn't it?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:35 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]comfortable is relative. wealthy is more definable.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:36 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]by your standards, sure, but there are many people who would define wealthy as way less than 10m
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:42 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
oh , shut up.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:36 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]why such hostility?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:36 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]b/c i'd say wealthy is over 2 million, that's why
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:42 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I disagree. 2m net is not wealthy. depends how much is in $ v. real estate. Comfortable maybe.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:45 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
i think there are a lot of people in nyc with very high HHI who live a "wealthy" lifestyle but whose new worth does nto qualify them as "wealthy"
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:43 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]true. they are not wealthy.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:47 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]and collapse
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:50 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
I consider my family wealthy on a $275k HHI.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:51 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]wealth is different from income.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:53 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]OK, I'm not sure what that means, but I still consider us wealthy
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:54 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]wealth is what you have. savings, investments, etc. that is different form high income. if you make 200K this year but spend it all and have nothing in the bank, you aren't wealthy.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:00 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Right. We have savings and want for nothing. What is that if not wealthy?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:01 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]well, i guess you and i don't 'want' the same things because $275K would be a hardship for us.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:16 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
forget it. she's not going to let you play
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:54 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]this is interesting. our hhi is $2m and i don't consider us 'wealthy'
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:13 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
IMO, $1M+ HHI. Hard to know how much $$$ people are sitting on.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]LOL, our income is 95K, so anything more than that for either income or savings sounds pretty wealthy to me!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:40 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] New psychic mom here. 123 replies
- to settle down for a while. In other words, even after you file you'll have a hard time figuring out what your HHI will be for a while....
- makes sense, that's what I'm worried about, I won't know my HHI and won't be able to plan myself until this thing is totally resolved. I might have to move temporarily with whatever he...
Talk : : November 14, 2008
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When will I conceive?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 08:54 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Early next year, I believe.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 08:54 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]jan/feb?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 08:58 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I'm getting March but I see very cold/snow so maybe early March?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 08:59 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]thanks... we're actually going to skip March as dh will be away most of it and we don't want a December baby if possible
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:01 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Hum. Guess you need to see how you're feeling in March, then. Not getting vibes that you'll have a hard time.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:03 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]thanks! hope not... I'm only 25!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:04 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Yeah, don't worry. Getting strong baby vibes from you.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:07 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]thanks!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:07 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
When I will meet the man of my life?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:08 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]hey! hey! and me?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:12 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]For you I am seeing warmer weather, shorts and bicycles. Spring? I see a large park, picnics, a frisbee.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:13 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
When I read your question, I keep seeing winter parties. I want to tell you to go to every party that you are invited to this holiday season. I also see a man with brown hair in a business suit at a party with silver decorations. It might be a New Years party or a friend's office party?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:12 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]not friend's office party, SAHM. But, if I'm invited to any I'll try to go.lol
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:17 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]But don't you have friends who work?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:19 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]yep, my best friend her dh is an IB that still has a job. Let's see, if something comes up I'll try to go!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:22 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]You know what, you should really push to go to that party. Had a strong reaction to that. Have a strong feeling that this is a friend's office party. Show your friend this thread and tell her that she needs to get you an invite. Then you must talk to everyone you meet there.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:23 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]cool! thanks! I will!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:33 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
As soon as you stop worrying about it...
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:47 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Easier said than done.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:47 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]OK 6 IVFs later - can I start worrying?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 12:11 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
Will our school director forgive us for complaining about the pirate costumes?
[ Reply | Options ]11.15.08, 08:35 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I hope you're still on: will my dd get into a tt school? will my business be successful financially soon
[ Reply | Options ]11.15.08, 06:55 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
Is the DOE going to change the K admissions policy again before next fall?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 08:55 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Magic Eight Ball says "not interesting enough, try again"
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 08:56 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Wait, I thought you were a psychic.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 08:57 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I am. I just think DOE questions are boring.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:01 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
WHERE IS MY SECOND BABY???
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 08:57 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I think you need to see an RE. I have this feeling about blockage.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 08:58 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Seen them all- there is nothing physically wrong with me or my husband- the first baby was a one night conception
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:09 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I'm sorry, still seeing blockage. Not sure what to tell you.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:15 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I think it is mental and do not know how to get rid of it. Thanks though. (I have heard this info before)
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:26 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Could absolutely be mental. Maybe take a break for a month, don't think about it at all, go on vacation?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:36 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Will I get into grad school?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:03 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Yes. You are going to make some change to the course of your study while you are there. You'll learn something that will pull you into a different direction.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:04 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]To clarify -- if you want to. I'm getting the sense that you're a bit conflicted about grad school.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:05 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]You are good
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:06 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Am I ready to start TTC?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:05 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]No, you need some more time. You're still figuring something out.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:06 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]when do you think we might be ready?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:20 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I really hope that I am wrong but I have this feeling that you need to work something out in your relationship first, and that you won't feel ready to try until you've settled it. This isn't a huge problem but it is some conflict that you have, maybe about lifestyle? Do you have very different future goals or current lifestyles? Sorry that I'm not being very clear.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:25 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I think you might be a bit off... dh and I both want kids and are settled into our relationship. We've had a rough year as his dad was ill and recently passed away. He really wants to start TTC soon, and I want to soon-ish, but not sure when. He works a LOT (lawyer) so that is the only "lifestyle" thing we have, but it is not an issue...
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:28 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Are you worried about the fact that his long hours will put a lot of strain on you as a new mom?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:37 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]a little, but we've discussed it (actually we talked about it last night). I plan to SAH with a new baby, probably until it is in preschool, which is fine with me. DH is completely willing to pull his own weight, and would rather come home and work in eves if he can... his schedule at least is pretty flexible, so he has that option. I know he'll be a great dad.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:38 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Yeah, I'm not sure why but I am getting this sense that you aren't totally ready yet, even with all these good facts. Maybe you just need to sit with the idea for a while? Are you worried about the change to your own lifestyle when you SAH?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:41 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]thanks. Yes, I think i'm not totally ready, but I do really wants kids, and not sure I'll ever be "ready". I know there will be a huge change to my life (and not a ton to dh's especially until db is born). I look forward to SAH, but I do want to work part time and I'm worried about trying that in this economy. I think we're going to start ttc in the new year...
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:43 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]You are going to be a good mom, I can tell. I think you're right to think it through and grapple with all of the feelings. Give yourself until the new year, that really feels right to me. You're going to be ready, you just need some time to go through all of the associated emotions.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:45 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]thanks so much! We've had so much to deal with this past year (got married, dh's dad's illness and death, lots of work stress) but dh wants a baby SO badly, and I want one too, at least relatively soon. I'm also worried about my mom, who is pushing that we wait longer...
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:49 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Yes, don't worry. Reassure him that you will be ready soon (and maybe tell him that you'd like to set the beginning of the new year as a loose target) but don't push yourself yet. You need time to absorb the stress of this year.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:54 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]thanks! you're good!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:55 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Happy to help!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:57 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]hey, while you're at it... do you think I'll have a girl or a boy?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:02 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Girl first. Came instantly!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:08 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]thanks. we want 3 eventually and HOPE one of each!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:15 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Yikes, I see girls all around you! Two, at least!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:42 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]awesome... ideally we want 2 girls and a boy, but would rather have 3 girls than 3 boys (I grew up with 5 brothers... want 1 boy but that's it!)
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:47 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Will my dc get in to Hunter off the waitlist?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:08 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Honestly, can't tell. Not getting any feedback on this one. Sorry.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:10 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Am I ever going to be successful in my current company? Am I respected where I am? Should I try and find a new position there?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:08 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I am getting mixed signs here. First, I don't think you are at the right place for you. Something about talent not being appreciated or that this isn't the right fit for your skill set. BUT, I am also getting the feeling that you should stay for a while and increase the length of time there for your resume and to get through choppy job market. It's not that you aren't respected, it is more that you aren't appreciated. Does that make sense?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:16 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Actually it does. Is there anything I can do while I am there to make it better (and maybe even protect my wonderful and talented team?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:18 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I keep seeing "bunker down." I guess that means that you should try to keep your head down and just work hard and stay out of the limelight for a while. Someone on your team will leave with you when you go.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:22 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]thank you - you are really good. One last question I promise - how can I get along better with my boss, who I think has my best interests from a work perspective.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:25 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Tough question. I think your boss is under a lot of pressure right now. I get the feeling that you should stay out of the way and just keep working hard through this period. I don't think your boss has an issue with you.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:38 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]so I guess I shouldn't expect to get promoted then ;)
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 12:40 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
Will DH and I start getting along better and understand each other more?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:11 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]As you indicate in your query, the issue is communication. He doesn't understand you, and you have trouble explaining yourself. This might sound strange, but I am getting the sense that you should try writing to each other instead of talking about critical issues because you will have an easier time communciating over email and really getting his focus.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:18 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
ANy serious ideas on when econ crises will level off and begin to recover?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:38 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]When I think about it, I see a long path ahead. I keep seeing summer as an end, but the problem is that I can't be sure if it is this summer, or the next one!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:42 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
What will my DC's SB score be?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:42 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]No clue, sorry. I don't usually see specific numbers and when I do they aren't necessarily in order so I don't want to scare you or get your hopes up.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:44 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
When will dh and I be finally separated?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:47 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Ok, tough question. You are fighting about the terms of the settlement, right? Did someone file something in court?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:48 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]not yet. It's very complex, can't tell everything here, but basically I'll have to wait for few months to be able to file any papers, any idea when finally I'll be able to file papers and be free fro dh?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:52 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]You haven't been living apart for a full year yet? Sorry, I'm a little confused. There is some technical legal reason for not filing? Is this an abandonment claim?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 09:56 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]we live under the same roof, because I can't file for separation yet, there's a technical legal reason for that, I just want to know when I'll finally be able to have them done and be able to file for separation and move .
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:00 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Ok, right. Got it. Here is what I am getting. You are going to file in march/april 2009, but there is some financial reason that will make it really hard to move. The filing of the papers won't result in financial settlement for a long time, maybe 6 months, so just filing isn't going to really change your living situation. For full disclosure, I'm having some fuzziness trying to read you.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:08 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]that means we'll be living under the same roof for over a year? Jesus Christ! that will be a problem! and what kind of financial problem exactly, the idea would be pay the same as here but for 2 different places.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:29 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Actually I don't see you living together for another whole year, or even close. I just don't see the filing as connected to your ability to move, if that makes sense? What I see is some fight about money that is going to really strain your ability to settle down for a while. In other words, even after you file you'll have a hard time figuring out what your HHI will be for a while.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:40 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]More specifically -- I think you are going to move somewhere very temporary, maybe to a 6 month rental or a friend's home or something like that? I just don't see you settled for a while.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:41 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]makes sense, that's what I'm worried about, I won't know my HHI and won't be able to plan myself until this thing is totally resolved. I might have to move temporarily with whatever he offers since I'm a SAHM.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:48 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Yeah, ok. That is exactly what I'm seeing. I see you very frustrated with the progress but otherwise pretty happy, honestly, in your new life. I clearly see a temporary move.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:52 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I'll definitely be a lot happier far from my husband!lol ! this temporary move you feel will staying in Battery park city or moving to Roosevelt Island or somewhere else?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 11:01 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]if you're leaving now, I want to thank you for your time replying! thanks!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 11:09 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
will my beautiful, smart, caring son get into Princeton or MIT even though he attends pubilc not private?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:22 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]ha ha. i went to one of the above and many of the smartest, coolest people there were from NYC public. that said, no read on your son re: actual college. i get the sense that he is really smart and is going to do something with his hands. architect, maybe?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:25 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]thanks :)
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:47 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Am I pregnant?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:30 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]No, I'm sorry, I don't think so.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:35 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]really? just did a transfer a few days ago
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:38 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Hum. Not getting pregnant vibe but I am never 100% accurate so keep your hopes up, you will be pregnant soon if this transfer didn't stick. Is it possible that you aren't technically pregnant yet but could be soon? I can't tell.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:44 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Walked away from laptop, saw that you will be pregnant really soon and wanted to tell you to please stay positive and maybe do yoga or meditation.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:53 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]You're funny. Thanks
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 01:16 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
what's it going to be like for me when DD #2 arrives in 6 weeks (marriage-wise, etc)
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:30 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Hum. Having a hard time reading you. Is your dh struggling a bit with baby #2?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:37 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]yeah sorry vague question. DH didn't struggle with baby #1, he just went right back to living life the way it was pre-baby...he's better now, but I'm worried that having two kids is going to drive us apart (I'm SAHM, he works at a hedge fund).
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:50 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Yeah, I almost get the sense that the frustration is more on your side. Can you try to talk to him about a plan to keep your connection strong after new baby comes? Get the sense that he isn't a bad guy, just a bit clueless (in the way that many...most? men are).
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:55 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
Will DH be laid off?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:31 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]No, but his bonus will be hit hard and others around him will be laid off. Tell him to keep his head down until March.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:38 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]He has another opportunity at a different firm--should he pursue it?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:38 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]PS, I ? you, psychic mom.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:39 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Huh? Don't understand, sorry.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:41 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
No. He should stay put. Strong feeling.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:42 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
will i have a vbac in march? will i have another ds or dd?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:36 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]DS. I see a BFP within 8 months and feel that you should keep your chin up. Does that make sense?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:43 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]no??
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 04:13 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
DH was laid off 3 months ago. Finance. When will he find a job?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:39 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Definitely not until next year, I'm sorry. Won't be far off into the new year, though. He is thinking about something totally different, right? Getting the feeling that he should be open to a different path and that it might make him happier.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:46 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]He is thinking seriously about starting a small gig of his own. Should he pursue it? Will it make him happy? Will it succeed?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:48 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]That's definitely it. YES. He might not do it for a while, I kind of see him going back to a bank or something bank-like, but that it will percolate and eventually he'll really focus on that. I think he will be happy. I don't see massive success but I see happy life.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:56 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Will I be back at work soon again?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:44 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Getting after the new year for you, too. Are you switching fields as well? Hope I'm not mixing you up with poster above yuo!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:46 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Will my ds be happy with the school he'll end up?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:45 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Yes. You will be, too, if not at first -- eventually you will feel like it was the right place.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:47 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Gotta run, folks. Will try to check in again at a later date. Best wishes to all.
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:47 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]I am pregnant, just got good news on all the tests, I am 42. Unplanned but I am happy. We don't know the sex yet - DH wants to know, says 'no more surprises please' LOL. Did not find out with DD, all I wanted was a healthy baby and thankfully she was and is. For DH though I will find out whenever the next opportunity is. Any sense girl or boy? TIA
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:52 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Ok, last one for now and unfortunately I can't tell! No clue at all, I'm sorry! I keep getting pulled in both directions, and that either means I can't read you well or...ta da...twins! Congrats, though! I'm getting "healthy" so that's good!
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 10:58 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
Will I have 1 kid or 2?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 11:05 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]Will we have another child?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 12:16 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]When will I get pregnant with #2? Boy or girl?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 12:47 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Will I get it together to write a book?
[ Reply | Options ]11.14.08, 01:24 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Will our school director forgive us for complaining about the pirate costumes?
[ Reply | Options ]11.15.08, 08:39 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]will my dd get into a tt school? will my business be financially successful soon?
[ Reply | Options ]11.15.08, 06:56 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] We have combined HHI of 500K. Dh works in Tribeca. Should we move to Brooklyn? Wha... 11 replies
Talk : : August 15, 2008
We have combined HHI of 500K. Dh works in Tribeca. Should we move to Brooklyn? What part? He wants an easy commute and I want a nice environment for kids to grow up (not sure if we are doing public or private yet - db is still a baby and we plan on at least one more). What parts would you recommend? Park Slope is too far.
11 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]08.15.08, 08:53 AM [ Flag ]Can i ask what you and DH do for work?
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 08:54 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]i'm a freelance writer. dh works in research at a bank. he brings in the bulk of it obviously. i'm home with the baby.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 08:56 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]dh works in a bank. i'm a freelance writer. he brings in most of it obviously. i'm home with the baby now.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 08:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]^^ (having trouble posting)
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 08:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
If Park Slope is too far, and DH works in Tribeca, I think that pretty much limits you to Brooklyn Heights. Your options expand dramatically if you're willing to commute a bit. Prospect Park South and Ditmas Park are beautiful, and you can have a 6 br house with a yard and a garage for the same amount you'd pay for a 2br in Park Slope.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 09:38 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]If you wanted to do the suburban thing, you could also do NJ. Many parts of it have great downtown commutes b/c you switch to the path. Hoboken could also work. In Brooklyn, I like Brooklyn Heights and Cobble Hill. In the city, I like... Tribeca and the West Village, both with good public schools.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 10:07 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]why not tribeca or the west village? would be great for dh commute. great schools, etc
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 01:12 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]I hope you are watching this. You might really like Carroll Gardens. Lotsa writers, and some great houses. It's expensive, though, like all the "discovered" neighborhoods in Brooklyn. Near Carroll Gardens is Cobble Hill (a little more upscale and conservative than CG), and Boerum Hill (which has two public schools, one of which is not very good). I love Park Slope too It is very crunchy, which is great if that is your style.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 01:20 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Good advice. I am not OP, but I also live/work in Tribeca and my dh & I are looking to move to Brooklyn with our new baby when our lease is up. DH used to live in Carroll Gardens and that is where we are looking.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 01:26 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]I live in Boerum Hill, and my favorite local nabe is Carroll Gardens. PS 58 is great. Watch the school district lines, though. You want to avoid PS 32 (east side of Smith) and PS 38 in Boerum Hill. Check insideschools.org for boundaries. Do NOT count on RE agents to tell you straight.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 01:37 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]^^^ Only if you are thinking of public schools, of course. :) There are great local private schools.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 01:39 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] The $900k. post was brilliant and quite entertaining. 5 replies
- Just read it. Yes, always love the poor little rich girl posts, fake or real! (75K hhi here)...
Talk : : August 15, 2008
The $900k. post was brilliant and quite entertaining.
5 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]08.15.08, 08:50 AM [ Flag ]LOL! ITA
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 08:53 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I genuinely believe she expected sympathy and support
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 08:53 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I think it was a fake post
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 08:59 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]i think she suddenly realized she really knows nothing about her family's finances and flipped out.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 09:30 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
Just read it. Yes, always love the poor little rich girl posts, fake or real! (75K hhi here)
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 09:14 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] HHI $180K, own a house in Park Slope, 2 dcs in public school. We're getting by fine. 1 reply
Talk : : August 14, 2008
[+] our hhi is $300K, 2 kids in private school, 1 with a nanny. rent a 3 br. 2 nice vac... 8 replies
Talk : : August 14, 2008
our hhi is $300K, 2 kids in private school, 1 with a nanny. rent a 3 br. 2 nice vacations a year. 2 european cars.
8 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]08.14.08, 08:19 AM [ Flag ]in Manhattan? Why 2 cars?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:21 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]and european cars to boot! BMW convertible is just so practical
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:46 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
Is there a question here or are you just providing information??
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:21 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Um, congratulations?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:42 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]oooh. european cars! I salute you!
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:45 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]How much do you save?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:45 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]me too, big deal
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:46 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]How much is your monthly rent?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:51 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] What would you consider wealthy, middle class and poor by manhattan's standards? 22 replies
- Our HHI is 115. There is a huge difference btwn what we can afford and what ppl...
- We have a HHI in NYC of about $650K and I can promise you we don't feel...understand, but I think it is an overly simplistic way of characterizing it. A HHI of $100K in a rent-controlled apt is different that same income in family who has...
Talk : : August 14, 2008
What would you consider wealthy, middle class and poor by manhattan's standards?
22 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]08.14.08, 08:09 AM [ Flag ]wealthy $500K +, upper middle class $250K - $500K, middle class $100-$250K, poor below $100K
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:12 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]np: wealthy is about more than your income, its what you have saved/invested.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:15 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]NNP: ITA, particularly about how lucky you were with real estate. I find that really divides the haves and have-nots, both in renting and owning.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:24 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]yes, but that's more complex to define here. I was merely addressing the income piece of the equation.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:35 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I understand, but I think it is an overly simplistic way of characterizing it. A HHI of $100K in a rent-controlled apt is different that same income in family who has to pay $4000 for similar apt. Huge difference in disposable income.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:38 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]well it's a message board, and there's only so much time and space to devote to in-depth analysis here.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:39 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
me too
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:17 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]We have a HHI in NYC of about $650K and I can promise you we don't feel wealthy. We try to save as much as possible so we can retire early, but it's stressful. I can't quit my job and we have to rely on a lot of help with the kids.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:33 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]that you can even consider early retirement makes you wealthy in my book. it's all relative, my friend.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:37 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]That's absurd. Most of the people retiring early are middle class, just with union or gov't jobs providing pensions.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:51 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]union members and those with gov't jobs aren't retiring early in Manhattan, which is the point of this thread.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:55 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]or if they do, they also work another job.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:56 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
I really couldn't say. I think it depends on if you bought something ten years ago, do private/public, have little kids that need childcare vs. older kids in public school, etc. And if you include above 96th/110th street... I notice that for us, we could live really well if we weren't intent on saving. It's the savings for college, retirement, the unknown that make budgeting more challenging.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:14 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]if we are only talking income then here would be my guidelines. 350k+ wealthy. 180-350k upper middle. 85k-180k middle class income.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:16 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]TO me, wealthy people in Manhattan don't work for a living (or don't have to). they live off investments/inheritance and never think about money. Upper middle class is anyone who works and earns above $500K. Middle class is $100K-500K. Lower middle class $50K-100K. Poor is below $50K.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:19 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I agree with this
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:21 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]np: That sounds right to me.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:22 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Our HHI is 115. There is a huge difference btwn what we can afford and what ppl making 500k or even 200k.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:25 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]OK, so move lower middle class to starting at 150K. it's not a science.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:26 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Yeah, but ain't it crazy that 150k is LMC?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:27 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Manhattan is a different world from the rest of the country. My parents live in a 5 bedroom house on an acre of land in Ohio and that house is worth about $200,000. They make about $100K a year and I would consider them middle to upper middle class where they are.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:29 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
yes, and there's a huge difference between 50K and 100K, but we're talking about ranges here.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:27 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] Our HHI is less than 150k, we rent in the 70's on the UWS, have 1 dc in private schoo... 31 replies
- hhi is about 80k. we have three dc, live in ny suburbs, own a car, send to parochial school. we even manage to save a...
- I'm poster above with mort/main of $3500. we live on a *very* tight budget with our HHI of $170K, no car etc. FA at private and we save some, but not enough. live very frugally. there was no way we could...
Talk : : August 14, 2008
Our HHI is less than 150k, we rent in the 70's on the UWS, have 1 dc in private school, own a car, vacation 2/yr...and yes, we are very happy and healthy overall. I don't know how we are getting by but we do. We have a lot to be thankful for.
31 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]08.14.08, 07:58 AM [ Flag ]good for you! how much is rent?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:59 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]$3900
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:01 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]wow. You are doing great. Guessing, financial aid for school.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:03 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]that's about our income, our mortgage/maintenance is $3500, have one dc in private with FA, don't have a nanny, no car, family vacations only (low $$). we also feel very fortunate.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:03 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
the "i make $990K a year and feel so poor" posts make me wish I could reach through the computer and slap somebody. We are getting by on $110K.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:02 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]you and me both, sister. anyone making that kind of money shoudl be grateful.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:04 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]:)
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:04 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
we are getting by on $165,000 with a one bedroom and expensive daycare, and I have nothing to complain about!
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:03 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]We are getting by on $80,000.......wonder how we do it!
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:04 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
But do you save?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:04 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I can't see how they're saving much, if anything.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:05 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]yes. wish we could put away more each month but for now, a little is better than nothing.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:05 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
You must get FA, no?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:04 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]actually no. would we qualify? didn't even apply thinking we wouldn't have a shot. maybe next year.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:06 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I call BS. there's no way you can afford private, $3900 month rent, a car, two vacations a year, and save a little on that income.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:08 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]np: I'm not quick to call bs, but have to agree here. Take home would be about $8k per month. $2500 for school, $4k to rent, leaves only $1500 per month to live on for everything, including food.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:10 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]but hey, it is doable!
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:13 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]poster below. her take home pay could be a lot higher than 8k/month.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:13 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]how?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:15 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]depends on what's being taken out. isn't it 13k gross? 20% taxes leaves her with over 10k.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:19 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]no way--take home is $7500-8K, less if putting $$ aside for 401K--I know from experience
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:21 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]She is paying more than that in taxes on that income
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:21 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
I'm poster above with mort/main of $3500. we live on a *very* tight budget with our HHI of $170K, no car etc. FA at private and we save some, but not enough. live very frugally. there was no way we could afford private with FA.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:14 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]If they are saving anything for retirement take home would be closer to 7K.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:16 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]No way, they also need childcare, utilities & when we made 140k take home was 6800 a month
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:18 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]No childcare. Sahm.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:20 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]still not possible.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:22 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
op: Not BS. See that's the thing...I honestly am amazed by how we seem to be getting by month to month. I should have also added that I rarely shop for myself and neither does my dh and we are careful about not spending frivolously day-to-day.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:12 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]then you're not telling us something. I live on that income and there's no way you can swing full $30K private tuition, your rent, a car, vacations, and save on that $$.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:16 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Your dc must not be at a private that costs 30k then b/c our mort/main is 2600 a month & we can't do private without FA & still can't take nice vacations.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:17 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
hhi is about 80k. we have three dc, live in ny suburbs, own a car, send to parochial school. we even manage to save a good amount. but we do have a great rental.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:09 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
[+] My husband and I make almost $900K together (he makes much more than me, though) and ... 124 replies
- sense. We have two kids and about the same HHI as you. Both kids are in private school and...
- Maybe the OP meant to write $90K HHI, and not $900K...
- ITTTTTTTTTTA. your HHI is 4x what ours is - and granted we...childcare which is approx $22K/year. seriously, if your HHI is 4x mine, shouldnt you be able to afford...
- These posts are very funny. Our HHI is 1/3 of yours and we manage...
Talk : : August 14, 2008
My husband and I make almost $900K together (he makes much more than me, though) and yet in NYC, we feel like we don't qualify as well-off, which is insane. Despite the recession, there are so many multi-millionaires in this city, and the housing is still unbelievably unaffordable. We have 3 kids and want a 4th and there is no way to afford enough space for everyone in a nice neighborhood. As it is, we live in a bad neighborhood, surrounded by projects, and our three kids share a room. This city is just so skewed. I wonder if the housing market will ever normalize so that we could afford to live on the UWS or even just somewhere pleasant.
124 replies [ Reply | Watch | Options ]08.14.08, 07:32 AM [ Flag ]If normalize means that a family of 5 or 6 can't get appropriate housing I am in trouble! If we had that money, we would be doing excellent.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:35 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Boohoo poor you and your paltry $900k.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 06:19 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
unless you are paying private tuition for all your kids, i don't see why, at your income level, you are in a 2 BR in a bad neighborhood. we take home less than half that and can afford a better apartment.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:36 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]We are doing private school because we live in East Harlem where our options are limited.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:41 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]you chose to live in East Harlem and have a huge HHI. why are we supposed to sympathize with you?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:44 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]then maybe you need to consider renting in a neighborhood with a decent public. no luck with TAG or Anderson?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:44 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]If the kids are like their parents, they can't be too smart.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:00 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
http://www.marykayg.com/html/for_sale.html
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 09:49 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]living in Ditmas Park isn't going to solve her school situation.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 02:41 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
ita, there must be some serious waste going on with your spending habits. we make WAY less and get along just fine.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 10:28 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
i'm trying not to flame here. yes, i think there are insanely wealthy people and they can afford to pay anything. and yes, it's driving up prices. but seriously, you can afford it to. how much do you spend on fine dining each month? how much do you spend on vacations? try tightening your belt for a couple of months instead of saying you can't afford things.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:37 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]We go on one vacation a year, and eat out only once a month. We don't own a car, we only use frequent flier miles when traveling on vacation. We are seriously not big spenders! I buy all my clothes online at JCrew. We are not brand name types.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:41 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]sorry. i don't believe you.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:43 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]then where is the money going? how old are your kids?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:44 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]We save money in IRAs and in 529s for the kids. Our mortgage and utilities are very expensive because we have a big mortgage.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:52 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]How do you have a big mortgage on a 2 bedroom in East Harlem. We own a 3 bedroom in West Harlem & can do it on 200k
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:53 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]how much did you pay for a 2 BR near the projects? and unless its huge, i don't see why utilities are so much.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:53 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]It's a brownstone, but our apartment only has 2BR. The rest we rent out. Oil heat goes up to $2000 a month in winter.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:59 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]So, sell it & buy one of those penthouses in the Langston & bank your profit.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:02 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]that's 5% of your take-home a month!
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 06:05 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Are you counting your rent roll in this 900K? Very strange.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 08:00 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
so let's see. say 50% off the top for taxes. 450k left. then private school plus 20k college savings for each kid. 300k left. say 10% retirement savings each year. 200k left. say 5k a month living expenses other than rent (which is way too much, imo). that leaves 140k a year for rent/mortgage.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:58 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]That is more than 11K a month - you can easily find something
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:00 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
np: do you save a lot of money in 401k etc. my sister always says money is tight but she saves a ton!
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:44 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]You are not making any sense. We have two kids and about the same HHI as you. Both kids are in private school and we have a house in the Hamptons and a big two-bedroom on the UES and we save money every month. Your numbers don't make any sense.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 02:35 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
There are lots of nice neighborhoods where you could live. There are still many brownstones in nice parts of Harlem that are under 2 million.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:39 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Have you tried living in Harlem. We do. And despite some improvements, there is still a lot of unpleasantness here. The playgrounds are dirty and mostly empty. There are no restaurants, let alone kid-friendly places to eat. There are no amenities. It is still very much a ghetto.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:43 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I;ve lived in Harlem for over 1 years and it is very far from a "ghetto". I see that you live in East Harlem, which is not at nice as West Harlem & has fewer amenities, so move to west harlem *& buy a brownstone.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:45 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]^^^ over 11 years that should read
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:46 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
Why East Harlem? Why not West Harlem? Or Washington Heights? Or Riverdale?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:46 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]But I just wonder why it is that affordable apts with this income aren't available south of 110th Street? Doesn't it seem skewed that a family making $900K can't live there? My parents lived on UWS and UES making far less money than we do. What has happened to this city that we have to live somewhere where we always have to commute to get to restaurants, kids' places, schools, museums, etc.?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:50 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I know plenty of people living below 110K who make under 900K - The people who make that much in Harlem own fabulous brownstones, they don't rent 2 bedrooms.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:51 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I have no idea what you're talking about. Plenty of people making a LOT LESS than $900K living below 110th Street
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:54 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
wow, what kind of harlem do you live in? The one we are in has super busy newly renovated playgrounds, plenty of places to eat and all the amenities we need but to each their own.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:48 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Where are you? If you're at 117th on the West Side, that is barely Harlem, more like Columbia. Go east to Central Harlem or East Harlem. Whole different game. We had two shootings this summer around the corner from us.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:51 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]are you op? with your income, why don't you buy a brownstone near columbia???
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:52 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]They are still too expensive. we have a brownstone. The brownstones in Harlem often look nice on the outside but require many $$ renovations to get them up to code. Many were neglected and there are lots of fixes that can't be seen from the outside, but which cost lots of money. Also, oil heating is very expensive for these houses.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:54 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]How much was the brownstone you bought?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Then buy one in the 140s, most of those east of Amsterdam and west of Bradhurst were never neglected & you can still get them for under 2 mill & they are much bigger than most of them in the 120s.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]If you have a brownstone - how do you not have enough space & why are three children sharing a bedroom?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:58 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]wait, you live in a brownstone but only have two bd rooms? Is it a condo? Something here doesn't make sense to me. You can buy a beautiful 3 bd rm apt near columbia easily on your income.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:59 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]We rent out 2 apartments in the brownstone to help pay down mortgage.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:00 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]How much do you get in rent? Also you never answered how much your brownstone was.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:02 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Mortgage and utlities are about $5800 a month, higher in winter.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:08 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]How much was your brownstone?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 09:15 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
I still don't understand where all your money is going. You should be able to spend $12k month on housing with your income.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:02 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]ITTTTTTTTTTA. your HHI is 4x what ours is - and granted we rent and have only 1 child, but we're still able to save money for savings AND retirement AND 529, pay down debt + student loans, pay over $3K in rent, and pay for childcare which is approx $22K/year. seriously, if your HHI is 4x mine, shouldnt you be able to afford more kids in a better neighborhood? i'm in UES.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 07:33 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
There were a few shootings on the LES this summer too & one on the UES. Central Harlem is just as nice as west Harlem these days.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:52 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
come on - how much do you bring home each month after taxes?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:39 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]you need to get a grip. That kind of money is insane for almost all people in this city and there is something about your spending that is the problem if you can't afford to live here.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:41 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]You I find very annoying.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:44 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]What is your monthly net income? How much is your mortgage? Do you have a car? A nanny? How old are the kids?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:45 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]They should be taking in about 34k a month
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:46 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]ita - she needs to break out for us where that money goes every month. no way they are struggling unless she is buying 3 birkins every month.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:47 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I think it is fake, if she lives in a two bedroom in East Harlem her rent in probably under 2K, or just 2K - it is one of the most affordable parts of Manhattan.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:50 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]exactly. how much is realy beign spent on tuition adn sitters? becasue that has to be the big expense.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:51 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Tuition is $25K per child, plus nanny (we both work full time). We own a brownstone, but only have 2 bedrooms in our apartment. I don't have any Birkins or any brand name bags, believe me.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:58 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]so you have rental income???
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:59 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
ita. op is not telling us the whole story. i get the feeling her standards are too high and she wants to live like a princess.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:51 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]No, we have a brownstone and rent half of it out to tenants to help pay the mortgage.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:53 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]How much was this brownstone in a crappy area? And why do you only have 2 bedrooms in half of a brownstone?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:58 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]well, you know, then you're doing okay if you can rent out half the house to help pay for the mortgage. You are a whiner supreme.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:59 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
oh my god...I can't even imagine having $34K a month!
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:48 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
That is a lot of $. Stop whining and complaining and be grateful for what you have.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:47 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]do you own your apartment? What are your monthly housing costs? How much is your kids' tuition? We make close to that, spend $7K a month on housing and nearly $40k a year on our nanny (we only have 1 child), and we take vacations and eat out a lot, and still manage to save A LOT. I can't imagine your expenses are so much higher than ours that you can't afford a decent place to live. Maybe not 4 bedrooms, but at least 3, in a decent neighborhood.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:49 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]ITTA.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:50 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Monthly housing is about $5800
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:56 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]ok, we make less than half of waht you do and coudl afford more rent than that, and get an apartment with 3 br's, in a nicer neighborhood. soemthiing is not making sense here.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:59 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]On your income you can afford more than that on housing. You are spending 10% of your income on housing. Normal is 30%.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:01 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]And how much do you get for rent? $5800 minus what - $1500?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:01 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]$5800 is what we pay after we get the rent money.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:08 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
OR: OK, so you are spending maybe $60K a year more than I am (your kids' tuition minus the difference between our housing costs; I'm assuming your nanny is in the same ballpark as mine). That still doesn't add up to me. Also, the fact that you are currently spending more on your childrens' private education than you are on housing is screwed up. Move to a neighborhood with a good public school and you can spend that additional $75K a year on an apartment.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:04 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
are you kidding???
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:49 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Please move out of NY. I live here on about 70K, so obviously your desire to "keep up with the Jones'" is skewing your perspective. Seriously, it sounds like you'd be happier elsewhere. GL...
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:50 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]ITA! I am a single mom with one dd and earn just under 100K. I live in a great, good sized, 1 BR rental apartment in Yorkville, my daughter goes to an excellent Public school, we eat out at least once a week, vacation once or twice a year and we are(nearly) deliriously happy :-) This family makes 9 times the income I do and she sounds miserable. Go figure.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 09:06 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
are you serious? You could get a brownstone on the UWS with plenty of room for your family on your income.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:51 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I know. She must be a fake.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 07:59 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Why would I bother? Not a fake at all. I think my husband manages our money conservatively because the market is so volatile. But I have not misrepresented our situation here at all. I just don't understand why on our income, we can't afford to be in a nice apt below 110th St. When I was growing up, there were middle income families of 5 and 6 on the UWS and other nice neighborhoods. Granted, the city wasn't as nice back then, but still. It has become the province of the top .5%.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:03 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]but everyone here is telling you that you can. Certainly you can afford a 3br apt below 110th street, b/c you can actually afford to spend twice what you are currently spending on housing.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:06 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]So you are saving a ton of money each month.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:06 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]we don't understand it either. have you made a monthly budget? lots of people are in nice apartments on much lower incomes. unless you paid WAY too much for that brownstone, something doesn't add up.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:06 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]The point of pretty much everyone responding to your post is that your premise is incorrect -- you CAN afford to be in a nice apartment below 110th St. on your income!!!
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:06 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]900K a year is not middle class. If I made that much, I'd consider myself rich. What everyone is telling you is: 1. there's a chunk of income that is unaccounted for in your account; 2 even if you were spending every penny on necessities, you can still live better on $5800K rent a mont than where you're living. For the same amount of money, you could have a nicer, bigger apartment in a nicer, safer, more convenient neighborhood. While I agree NY is disgustingly expensive and harder and harder to live in unless you have a lot of money, you DO have a lot of money by the standards of normal people. You just made a bad housing decision. Surely, you can see that, right? Would you rent a 2br apt in East Harlem for $5800? Nope. That $5800 can get you a nicer living situation. Your brilliant husband didn't think this through.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 10:26 AM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Big. Fat. Liar.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:02 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I think your DH must have a drug/gambling/prostitute habit he's not telling you about and half your income is going to that. There is no other explanation.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:08 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]LOL! or else he gets a lot of income in a bonus and doesn't want to sepdn that, so his idea of their income and hers are radically different.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:11 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]If Uncle Sam considers it income, it's income!
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:12 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
STFU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:39 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I don't get it. I understand how you may not feel wealthy on that but you can certainly afford a nice 3 bedroom in a nice neighborhood and live VERY comfortably on that. We make less than that (about 650) and have a 3BR coop in doorman building in the heart of the UWS. We pay about 10.5K a month for housing but still have money for a car, country club, one private school tuition, 529 and retirement savings. I don't shop on Madison ave either but certainly have money for nice dinners, vacations etc. and don't feel like I am not "well-off". You need to figure out where your money goes!
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 08:42 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]http://www.marykayg.com/html/for_sale.html
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 09:48 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]I'm sorry, you're just retarded. You both work make almost $1M, own a brownstone with income property. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and set priorities you beanhead. My DH and I make combined almost $4M per year and there are alot of people who make us feel poor but you don't hear me whining about it. Grow up.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 10:15 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]If you feel poor on 4m a year, there is something wrong with your world view. Instead of congratulating yourself on not "whining" that you are not richer, meditate on how much richer you are than all but a few. You are so privileged, you don't even really understand how privileged you are. this is a new low on UB. Someone who makes $4m a year lecturing someone who makes $900K a year on having a stiff upper lip about not being richer. Get me a barf bag, someone, quick.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 10:29 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Sorry, I had to step away to polish my diamond end table (by MYSELF!!). Please see below
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 10:50 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
ok, you need a major drubbing with a cluestick, lady. we don't even make half of what you make, we just bought a 2-bed in a nice nabe and we are making adjustments to our very nice lifestyle that we consider ourselves lucky to have. there will always be someone richer than you in nyc. that doesn't necessarily make you poor.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 10:13 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]maybe your husband has a Spitzer hobby/habit
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 10:23 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]huh?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 10:24 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]hookers at $4000 a pop, it was a joke
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 10:25 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]OK as usual you're missing the point. I do not feel poor or sorry for myself. I adore my life. My point was that compared to some people in New York that we socialize with who have their own planes, etc we have much less. But who cares????!!!!! My POINT!!! was that this woman is a beanhead for complaining.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 10:48 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]And when I say they make us "feel poor" I mean that we talk about it and joke about it like OMG they make me feel poor. Hah hah. Not boo hoo.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 10:55 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]But you make 4m a year! How hard is it to not make everything seem funny?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 10:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]OK so that made me laugh. I wasn't complaining. I totally agree. In fact whenever I find myself feeling sorry for myself for anything (as human beings do) I very quickly realize how absurd it is, AS SHOULD THIS WOMAN
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 10:59 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
I understood your point perfectly well. Here's what you don't get: A person who makes $4m a year cannot lecture anyone who makes less about their attitude toward money. It's unseemly. Do you understand that?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 04:21 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
YOUR point? i'm the cluestick poster above. stop pretending you're me.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 06:27 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
This woman is mentally defective. Why are you all encouraging her? You should be ashamed of yourself.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 02:48 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]
Don't reproduce if you don't have the money. It's not a god given right to be able to have 4 children. This world is populated enough. You shouldn't be whining about not being able to have a 4th b/c you can't afford it.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 03:10 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]but there is no good reason why she can't afford it. the numbers seh's givign do not add up.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 03:14 PM [ Flagged | link to this post ]This post does not make sense......to the original poster stop complaining and start figuring out where the money is going!!!!
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 03:24 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
you know this is just dumb. so many people in NYC make WAY less than 900k. we make about $160k combined: one of us works FT and one of us works PT to be home with our toddler. we're in contract for a new condo in a GREAT brooklyn neighborhood.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 04:44 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]very serious: what 'hood? we'll be looking soon in similar situation. thanks.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 06:22 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
you are too thick (in the head) to have any more children.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 04:45 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]As stupid as this couple is, what moronic companies are paying them a combined salary of $900k/year? Please tell us who you work for in case we own stock in these companies . . . sell, sell, sell.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 04:47 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]good point
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 04:50 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
gosh, i feel like I want to respond but am at a loss for words.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 05:02 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]good god. get a grip or move to the burbs
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 05:21 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Maybe the OP meant to write $90K HHI, and not $900K
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 06:08 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Which schools have 25K tuition over a spread of grades?
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 06:16 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]
talk to a financial advisor.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 06:16 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]GET. A. REAL. LIFE. WITH REAL PROBLEMS. GROW UP, LADY.
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 06:17 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]so sick of these posts. move out of NYC for crissakes
[ Reply | Options ]08.14.08, 06:47 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]This post really makes me sick. This is about your insecurities. Try to live life by other standards and get out of the vortex. Your "nice" neighborhood views are skewed. The rest of us are making due on about 20% of what your family earns.
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 05:20 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]These posts are very funny. Our HHI is 1/3 of yours and we manage to live okay in a East midtown doorman coop. We are however out of space if we have a 2nd child. And the next jump up in apartment size is too much $$ for us to handle right now. BUT if we made $900K, we certainly could afford a very nice 3 bedroom. Not on 5th Avenue, but w/o question we would be able to afford many UES buildings. Your problem is that you are probably hanging out w/ people that are above your income. There will always be someone richer. Make some new friends at your income level and you'll see they are more than happy and live well on $900K...
[ Reply | Options ]08.15.08, 07:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]lady, you need to get a financial planner if you're struggling with $900K a year
[ Reply | Options ]08.20.08, 01:49 PM [ Flag | link to this post ]Get over yourself. My husband and I make literally 1/10th of what you do, and we have a perfectly nice life here. You are suffering from a sense of entitlement and envy. You are a perfect example of why the rest of the world hates Americans right now.
[ Reply | Options ]08.21.08, 06:57 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]Your husband is a cheapskate and you, I'm afraid, are none too bright. He has convinced you that you need to live this way and you believe him. He's either socking away so much $ that you will be able to retire to an island paradise at 50 or he's spending it in ways that you are not aware. The best advice on this board: hire a financial planner. The numbers don't add up. And bail on Harlem. Why with all that money would you want to live in a place that you think is scary and ugly.
[ Reply | Options ]08.21.08, 07:10 AM [ Flag | link to this post ]
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