Shaving with lather
Like conservative commentator Andrew Sullivan, I, too, used to enjoy "riding bareback." Except not in the "unprotected anal sex with men" sense of the expression. More like the "shaving without shaving cream" sense.
Actually, no one has ever referred to shaving without shaving cream as "riding bareback." But it's easy to imagine how that might happen, and funny to consider all the cultural confusion — and unexpected new friendships — that would occur as a result.
Shaving without shaving cream sounds crazy to consumers familiar with the billowy white, lemon-scented foam blasted forth from the nozzle of a Gillette can. But smooth foamy shaving aids are just not necessary. Instead of using shaving cream, you can step out of the shower, and, like a real man, just up and shave with hot water.
Result? Faster. Easier. Cleaner. And it impresses people around you, because you're such a strapping young he-man. And contrary to popular belief, unless you've got sensitive skin: no cuts. Very little irritation, if any. And it's sort of exciting when you get started.
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But truth told, after a few years of this, it can wear on you. Set in your manly ways, you don't consider going back to the decadent nancyboy fluff of commercial shaving cream, but there are many days when you just don't feel like dragging a Mach III along your unprotected face. This means a day full of stubble at your otherwise clean-shaven workplace, and goodnatured abuse from the girlfriend.
Fortunately, history has the answer — an old-fashioned shaving system using lather, instead of cream. And Maine yuppie-care provider Burt's Bees offers a throwback to the good old days when your shaving-related friction diminisher was something you made yourself, using a special block of soap, a little ceramic pot, and a bushy, masculine brush.
And what is this line of shaving and other men's care products called? Bay Rum.
God, Bay Rum. RRR. Man. Bay Rum. Yeah. Makes you want to chop down a spruce tree. Or lift up a radiator. Or adjust some lugnuts. Ungh. You feel manly just typing it, like an enormous 200-foot pine tree is going to spring up between your legs and catapult you through the air into the midst of a lumberjack competition, or something.
That aside, the real beauty of the Bay Rum shaving system is its ritual. You run some hot water into the ceramic pot. Using your brush, you whip up a layer of lather. You apply the lather to your face, shave, and you're done. It's a little more spiritual than shaving cream from a metal can. You can moderate the temperature of the lather, or the amount. The brush feels luxurious. And the shaves are first-class.
What's more: You smell like Bay Rum when you're done. No one actually knows what Bay Rum is or was, but you can bet that pirates and firemen alike used it to shave. My barebacking days are over.
