He seemingly came out of nowhere. A lone gunman with a penchant for guns, girls, and gore burst onto the PC scene in 1991 — but after a three-game rocket ride to success, the bonds of glory addiction began to squeeze too tight. Now, with a future game in development limbo and his celebrity fading fast, Duke Nukem has shocked his detractors by staging a surprise comeback in Duke Nukem: Manhattan Project.

This is Behind the Game: The Duke Nukem Story.

For a young psycho named Duke Nukem, it all began in the PC’s hallowed two-dimensional days. Starring in the low-budget Duke Nukem and Duke Nukem 2 from Apogee, Duke whiled away the hours running left and right, hopping on platforms, and killing alien scum dead with a spring in his step and a rocket launcher grasped firmly in his fist.
When the Big Time called, Duke answered with willful abandon. First-person shooter Duke Nukem 3D was a smash hit, and a sequel, Duke Nukem Forever, was given the green light. But then…nothing. The radioactive green flame of Duke’s career threatened to extinguish…maybe forever.

Now, Duke has returned to where it all began — running, jumping, and womanizing. In the 3D platform side-scroller Manhattan Project, Duke has dusted off his old catchphrases, added to his repertoire with the same irrepressible verve, and hopped once more into his “platform” shoes.

Unfortunately, a slap of paint and an extra dimension can’t hide the threadbare plot and archaic gameplay mechanics lurking beneath the surface. Though the embrace of an old friend is comforting, Duke’s triumphant comeback has the world-weariness of a modern-day Hall & Oates concert — out of touch and a missed opportunity. We can’t go for that. No can do.

Manhattan Project starts with the best of intentions: the evil Mech Morphix has infested New York with mutated beasties, baiting Duke into hunting Morphix down and disarming bombs attached to the city’s most buxom hoochies. With the motto “I go where I please, and I please where I go,” Duke races left and right, collecting key cards and killing anything that stands between him and Morphix.

But what starts with a tremendous bang ends with a whimper. Nostalgia and quips aren’t quite enough to carry Manhattan Project to its conclusion: the sameness of the game’s eight missions (each has three parts) leads to monotony, monotony leads to boredom, and boredom leads to playing other games.

Yet even while dangling from the precipice of despair, Duke still manages to pull himself up. Secrets pepper each level like strippers’ tears on a long, shiny metal pole. Topical jabs are tossed out with the consistency of used prophylactics at a fleabag hotel. (“You’re going down like Enron” is a nice one.) Best of all, Duke’s arsenal of pipe bombs, assault rifles, and pulse cannons turns pig cops into chunks of splattered meat. As Martha Stewart might say, it’s a good thing.

Duke Nukem’s explosive resurrection comes at a (good) price — $24.99, to be exact. After rapidly descending into an abyss of power-up addiction, gaming’s legendary star has made his way back to the big time. Back to his gaming roots, the man who likes to kick ass and chew bubble gum is still all out of bubble gum.

— Chuck Osborn