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Number plates? Just treat them with contempt
Isn't it about time the venerable but now farcical system of sticking totally forgeable, easily stolen, number plates on motor vehicles ceased? I mean, it really is stupid when you think about it…
The original idea, a century ago, was laudable – back then, making a plate and bolting it to a car was a serious job. Now any Tom, Mary or Mpho can have a set of plates made to order – or simply steal a set – for or from a car of the same make and similar colour and Bob's your Oom.
No more camera-generated speeding tickets – except for the poor sod whose plates were stolen and who will be harassed into the grave by traffic cops bearing summonses and warrants of arrest to be followed by court appearances, contempt of court charges and other legal stuff.
Parking tickets? Any home computer can copy, edit and laser-print a reproduction licence disc with registration, engine and chassis numbers edited to match the false plates.
I submit, your honours, that a mere number plate and a photograph (despite time, date and speed printed thereon) no longer constitute irrefutable evidence and that all such prosecutions be thrown out of court, with costs.
I rest my case. – The Editor
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 |  | | IT'S ALL IN THE DETAILS: The Jaguar XK8 is so tightly styled it looks almost plain at first glance. Pictures: DAVE ABRAHAMS and ROB TILL |
Coventry's million-buck cats snarl into SA
[ See related stories ]
February 5, 2006
 By Dave Abrahams
When Jaguar's design team first put pencil to drawing board in 2000 for this the latest XK coupé and convertible the deal was for two cars in one: the successor to the XK8 had to be a luxurious 2+2 as well as a seriously muscular and agile sports car.
Classic styling by Ian Callum, with touches from the D and E-types to remind you of its pedigree, has created a car restrained almost to the point of austerity but with not a line or detail out of place.
From some angles the XK looks almost plain, from others you begin to understand how much work went into getting the proportions just right
The deck gives the coupé a long, fastback roof with more than a hint of E-type 2+2 |
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It's a big car, 4.79m in length and almost 1.9m wide with a rear deck made long to take the folded soft top that disappears in less than 18 seconds under an aluminium lid. That deck gives the coupé a long, fastback roof with more than a hint of E-type 2+2 and makes it the prettier of the two.
The all-aluminium convertible was developed first. Two enormous box-shaped extrusions run along each side over which you must clamber to get in or out – but Jaguar says they’ve given the XK the stiffest shell in its class. It also claims to be the lightest.
Slightly different inner and outer side panels and a roof created the coupé without changing the lower body; the two models share 95 percent of their parts.
The bodies are assembled from aluminium castings, extrusions and stamped sheet-metal using the bonding and riveting developed for the current XJ sedan; the car should be virtually immune to corrosion
The bodies are assembled from aluminium castings, extrusions and stamped sheet-metal |
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Power comes from Jaguar's 4.2-litre V8; for this application the maker quotes 219kW at 6000rpm (5kW down on earlier estimates) and 411Nm at 4100rpm, 85 percent of which is available from 2000 through to 6000rpm.
Jaguar claims 5.9sec to 100km/h and a (limited) top speed of 250km/h yet there's no "kick in the back" feeling; the XK seems to gather momentum rather than accelerate. The low-down torque (350Nm at 2000rpm) lets the car rumble effortlessly along on barely a whiff of throttle.
And I did say rumble: the XK's inlet and exhaust plumbing (as well as certain vibration paths in the car's structure) have been tuned to damp out higher frequencies while accentuating the bass for a very sexy V8 sound.
When you put foot a valve in the exhaust system opens and a stronger, more mechanical, sound dominates; it's louder outside the car than in and spine-tingling with the top down.
It drives through a new ZF six-speed, semi-auto transmission that replaces the universally maligned Jaguar J-shift (hooray!) with a simpler L-pattern. Put it in D and it's a smooth, very refined box, perfect for cruising; push the lever left (DriveSport) and it will hold the intermediate gears to the power peak at 6000rpm before changing – with impressive results.
Throttle blip
Manual sequential changes can be made with paddles behind the steering wheel. If the gear lever is in D the box will change up by itself. With the stick in "Go" mode, however, you almost have to bounce the big V8 off the rev limiter before it will change without your say-so and you can hold it in second through a slow corner with the engine howling.
Touch the left paddle going down to a tight corner and it will blip the throttle as it changes down – but the point is that, unless you are going so fast that the engine would self-destruct, it will change down.
This is one of the few semi-automatics that does what you tell it even when it thinks you're wrong, fulfilling Jaguars design brief that the car's electronics should "empower rather than overpower" the driver.
The adaptive suspension is supple and compliant around town but the more you stress any given corner of the car the stiffer that shock absorber will become; the front two under braking, the rear under acceleration and the outer two in hard cornering.
The steering is light (perhaps just a little too light at high speed). With traction control off it will give you just a taste of understeer before Nanny steps in.
Remarkably agile
With traction control on you don't feel it working even on a streaming wet road; the car just slows down, although I did get the tyres to complain loudly during the track section of the launch drive.
The car is remarkably agile despite its size and 1635kg; going hard over Franschhoek pass in light drizzle with the top down and the engine note blasting back from the rock walls, hitting the apex of every corner spot on and using the torque to launch out, is a memory I'll savour.
It's a hard-charging performance car with the road skills to back up its muscles.
The deep, leather bucket seats were amazingly comfortable as I cruised the Southern Cape's open roads later in the coupé. Were it not for the scenery flashing by and the lack of stale cigar smell we might have been in a gentlemen's club in London.
The XK's interior is all about fine leather, double-stitched by hand (even the fascia!) with just enough walnut inlay (not millimetre-thin veneer as on expensive competitors) to remind you that this is a very English grand tourer.
You can, however, ask for textured aluminium rather than timber for a very smart hi-tech cockpit finish. It also has some upmarket mod cons that include a touch-sensitive, 18cm screen for the satellite navigator and dual-zone air-conditioning controls.
Green-lit instruments
There are neat audio and cruise control switches on the steering wheel and the 10-way electric seat adjustment controls are on the door panels where you can actually see them rather than alongside the seat where you have to work by feel.
Between the big, green-lit instruments there's an LCD that tells you if the car is doing anything out of the ordinary (door-open, traction control off, etc) and at other times is a neat analogue clock – hard to read in bright sunlight, though.
Jaguar says that the car is bigger inside than the XK8 thanks to a longer wheelbase and wider body; that's as may be but the rear seating is still too small to accommodate even a child without moving the front seats uncomfortably far forward.
XK project leader Russ Varney said customer feedback had convinced Jaguar to retain the 2+2 layout even if it's no more than a leather-upholstered parcel shelf. Boot space, even in the coupé, is unimpressive (Jaguar's otherwise comprehensive specification sheet doesn't give its capacity) while that of the convertible is a bit of a joke.
There's a space-saver spare under the boot floor.
Jaguar SA CEO Thomas Viehweg said at the launch that the XK would be released in South Africa in late May or early June 2006 in coupé (R950 000) and convertible (R1-million+) format.
  
 
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|  | | HI-TECH COCKPIT: You can ask for textured aluminium inlay rather than timber. |
|  | | D-TYPE DETAILS: The oval grille has been a Jaguar design signature for 50 years. |
|  | | CLASSIC LINES: But from this angle the coupé is distinctly the prettier of the two. |
|  | | A GLORIOUS TOY: The XK is powered by Jaguar's proven 4.2-litre V8 (top) but the boot on the convertible (above) is a bit of a joke. |
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