User Comments: Date: 12 December 2001
Summary: Note to Mr. Green: Stick with your day job
The only reason why I'm not infuriated at Tom Green for this horrendous,
aimless piece of garbage is I can't say I got what I didn't expect.
Anyone
who has seen his show knows that Green has a perverse, eccentric (to say
the
least) approach to humor. And this is a perverse, eccentric movie.
What's
missing? The laughs, of course.
I've watched "The Tom Green Show" many times, and I almost always laugh
out
loud. Green doesn't have any "wit" or "structure" behind his humor, but
he's the kind of guy you have to laugh AT. And when you do, you'll laugh
big. He's an acquired taste, and I've acquired it.
This is Green's first starring role, an effort he also directed and
co-wrote. His past appearances have been in supporting roles in such
films
as "Road Trip" (where he was hilarious) and "Charlie's Angels" (where he
was
lame, but nowhere as lame as the overall film). Perhaps, he should stick
with the supporting roles. When he actually tries to write a film with a
"story" and "characters," it's a total mess! I'd rather watch him
humiliate
random civilians on his show. I think what makes the humor on his show
click is that there's variety, and you don't know what to expect. A new
surprise every week. Like the "Howard Stern Show." In this film, he
recycles the same crappy, brainless gags over and over again. This
includes
verbal gags in which he repeats the same sentence two or more times. It's
funny at times, but in the long run it's just silly and dull. There's
also
a disgusting array of humor involving masturbating animals (as in HUMANS
masturbating the animals). OK, so "Eyes Wide Shut" had to be cut for the
R-rating because of a few explicit sex scenes, but this movie gets away
with
an R while displaying an elephant drowning a guy with his
semen.
Green does some very outrageous stuff on his show, the most notorious
being
a gag where he sucks milk out of a cow's udder. Well, imagine that
outrageousness...UNCENSORED!! As if the stuff he got away with on TV
wasn't
shocking enough. Some of these gags are downright sadistic. One example
is
when he delivers a baby and cuts the umbelical cord with his teeth. As a
result, blood squirts all over the place. Excuse me if I sound like a
prude. If things like that make you crack up--first of all, I won't ask,
and second, this is the movie for you and you don't have to read another
word of this review. There's also a running gag involving a young boy
getting violently injured. As if there wasn't enough sadistic comedy,
there's one where Harland Williams gets into a skateboarding accident and
the bone from his knee pokes through his flesh. Green comes over and
licks
the blood off his bloody knee, with a smile on his face.
I don't mind watching a disturbing film, as long as it has a message, a
moral, some sort of point. And I don't mind dark comedy, as long as it's
done right. I believe almost anything can be made funny, with appropriate
handling. Just watch the graphically violent comedy "Very Bad Things" and
you'll see what I mean. Or even "Fargo"--a better example. I was just
glad
the whole child abuse subplot in this movie wasn't taken to
extremes--that's
about the best compliment I can give. There's a pretty funny scene where
Green says "F**k you" to his foul-mouthed, pedophilic father (well-played
by
Rip Torn). Dad takes it literally, pulls down his pants and wants him to
do
just that. Twisted, but funny...in a twisted way. So in case you're
wondering if the title "Freddy Got Fingered" really means what you think
it
means--you guessed correctly. And Freddy is not Green's character, it's
the
character of his brother, played by Eddie Kaye Thomas.
And of course, we can't have a sadistic comedy without a touch of
misogynism. The only major female character is a nymphomaniac!! I'm sure
feminists everywhere will p**s in their panties when they watch Green's
nympho love interest (Marisa Coughlan) continually insist on giving him a
b**w job.
I've seen dark, shocking, cynical humor before--but this is borderline
Satanic, not to mention dull. I guess Green's intention was to make this
like a car accident: have the audience gasp at the horror, yet at the
same
time have their eyes glued to the scene anticipating what will happen
next.
Well, I don't know about the rest of you guys, but I could not wait for
this
movie to be over! The only reason why I watched it straight-through was
because I wanted to get it over with, so I won't have to continue watching
it another time! And it just got more and more exhausting by the minute.
As I said, I like Tom Green--in general--and his show cracks me up, but
writing, directing and acting in movies is not his forte. This is simply
mindless (I often exaggerate when I use that word, but this time I'm as
literal as can be!!!) tripe that tries to excuse itself as low-brow,
eccentric comedy. I never said Green was a comic genius, but he does have
a
good deal of potential. It's hard trying to dignify a man whose humor is
capable of making Kindergarteners roll their eyes, but when I'm
laughing--I'm laughing. And I don't try to get too scientific about it.
But this time around, I wasn't laughing.
My score: 3 (out of 10)
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